THE WRIGHT STATE OF MIND

[cptwright 1]

just had to ask, when did i become a rear admiral? cool, but just noticed today. **opens eyes, and sees the world again** :)

[Mike 5]

Congrats Cap ! I think that happens at 2500 posts if I remember right..

[Jeanway 0]

just had to ask, when did i become a rear admiral? cool, but just noticed today. **opens eyes, and sees the world again**

 

 

 

 

 

UH OH, now what? :) I guess I'll have to be nice to you now :)

[cptwright 1]

well i thought you liked me anyway, so now its only because of my rank. :) now im sad.

[cptwright 1]

this is a pic of me and justin (my adopted son) any of you who have read all along should know who he is, and the baby is a friends newborn. just thought i would put a face to a name with justin. anyway i liked the pic so i thought i would share.

 

scratch that. i'll have to shrink it and attach it later.

[cptwright 1]

well heres that pic i talked about a few days ago. what a few days its been. lots of work, no money, and a whole lot of grief. well the house will finally be listed on monday. and hopefully the realtors right, it'll sell rather quickly. ive had it around here, its been one messed up week, between the ex, and everything. mostly the ex. she is driving me absolutley batty. last night i was out for a little while,(no i did not have a drink, you know who you are. <_< ) and she must've called litterally 15 to 20 times, i tried to ignore it but you can for only so many times. saturday night i had to save her from herself, she called me drunk, and needed a ride, i got a ride for her from my sister, because i was in no shape to drive either. but anyway i had to go anyway because some guy thought he was goin home with her, she insisted that she did nothing to give this guy any ideas, but whatever, i had to set him straight that he was not goin anywhere near MY HOUSE, or ECH, MY WIFE, just so he would leave her alone, so we dropped her off at the house, at the same time a friend called, so i asked if i could call her back in a minute, oh lisa started yellin, why i dont know, but she did, she asked who it was i told her and she tried to take my phone so she could call her, of course i wouldnt let her, and she flipped out and hauled off and smacked me. i left, and sunday she was normal again, well normal for her anyway. i mean were not together, i go over there to work on the house and as a friend when she needs it, and she needs it. then i suddenly become the bad guy again because im goin out, or doin something else than just hangin out there. i know i should just tell her go pack off but i cant. i care too much about her well bein, and its just not how i am. it sucks sometimes but i cant help it. so when i move at least i wont have to be here and deal with that crap. she jsut keeps saying im different, im not the same matt, i keep saying your right, but she thinks its a horrible thing, i think its just fine, and the reaction to my circumstances. im single now nothing wrong with goin out with my buddies, i didnt do it when i was with her, she did it all, all the time. now she can she dont, i can i do. i know she regrets everything she did, and that were here now. she says all the time she wishes it could be like it was, and that she lost everything. but i cant go back to her and the life i had anymore. i just wish i could get out of this purgatory im lliving in right now and move on down in VA. i know it'll happen soon, but damn, not soon enough. well off to work again, and then to the house to finish up the bedroom. sorry for the rattleing babble, have a good one.

 

PEACE

[Jeanway 0]

So, Um, you have a new baby? HuH <_< And who's the guy? { I just hate what I'm thinking } Sounds like your on your way to Change, it's a rough ride Buddy, but you'll make it So Sorry about the AMBUSH, but someone had to do it Just trying to help. Just remember " To thine own self be true" , and everything will evolve as it should. Commodore Jeanway Out

[cptwright 1]

thanks jeanway. appreciate the support. and hey as far as the ambush goes......IT'S ALL GOOD. LOL :lol: to myself i am trying to be true. and i think i am more so than not. THANKS AGAIN. goodnight.

 

PEACE

[cptwright 1]

well its been a few days, hows everyone doin? well my house finally listed today. for sale sighn in front and all. about time. god i hope it sells quick. i cant wait to sell and move. i dont really have much to say i guess at the moment so, PEACE, ttyl

[cptwright 1]

hey whats up people? not much here, just work, work, and more work. got someone coming to look at the house tomorrow. god knows im tired, and just feel like im moving non stop without sleep. but i guess i'll sleep when im dead. lol. the ex is still driving me batty, and then not so bad. god knows i really need to get the heck out of here. well im outta here, tall to ya'll later.

 

PEACE

[cptwright 1]

well someone was at the house tonight, and the realtor called a little later and said they were really interested. GOD PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE. i really need to get away from here. im gonna miss the new friends and all but i cant deal anymore. wish me luck people. hopefully the insanity will diminish soon.

[Jeanway 0]

Aw, Matt. Everything will be ok, you'll see. But, nope the insanity goes with you. But away from there it won't seem so bad. There IS something better waiting for you out there. I hope you believe me, really, there is. :P Maybe it IS a HOUSEBOAT, who knows? I wish you all the best in your new life. And I wish you LOVE. :o You'll still be around here won't you? We'd all miss you if you weren't. Besides that, who would I torture if you weren't here?

[cptwright 1]

thanks jeanway, yeah of course ill still be around here. i could never leave this place. and the people. as far as torture goes, give me your best. lol. well off to work, and mowing the lawn at the house again, someones coming tonight to look at it.

[cptwright 1]

well damn i guess i havent been around much these days.but alas last night i tried to get on, the one night im home, with nothin to do, and what happens, AOL wouldnt connect, i couldnt get on. anyone else have problems last night with their aol? so whats everyone been up too? well had quite a few people look at my house so far. god i hope someone buys it. well i gotta get, and do a few things. talk to ya'll later.

 

PEACE

[cptwright 1]

well heres a kick in the pants for ya, or me that is. about 15 minutes ago i got a call from the realtor that the people who looked at the house last night loved it, and want to bring their folks by saturday morning to look at it, and if they like it put in an offer. PLUS, now for the NEGATIVE. anonymously i just found out that my name was not on the list of next hires for norfolk fire. it is being looked into, seein as i had an interview and all and that the only reason i didnt get the job was they didnt get to me on the list at that time, my name should be on this list. GOD HELP ME. why when i have good, does the bad always follow but outweighing the good.

[RikerChick 5]

*hugs* Wish I had something more helpful to say.

[cptwright 1]

*hugs* Wish I had something more helpful to say. 

THANKS RC :) well the inside track is that the list was of UNPROCESED applicants whereas I AM ON THE PROCESSED applicants list. so i should still be golden. PLEASE, PLEASE PLEASE. but now my trucks falling apart. :) oh yeah and im BROKE. :) god i cant wait to get rid of my house, oh yeah ive said that already. :) oh well just keep thinking whats waiting for me when i get the heck outta dodge.

[Ace 0]

Hope the job works out, Matt. Just wondering, did you get a contract with those people or did they end up not making an offer? Either way, I'm sure it'll sell soon enough.

 

(Edit: Got my dates screwed up; thought that was referring to last Saturday. :) )

[cptwright 1]

no contract yet their coming back saturday. so hopefully after that. BTW did i mention, obviously not, the night i had tuesday. i went out with some friends and was having a godo time with some girl, it was going great, then she asked for a ride to go meet a friend quick, so my friend took her, when they got back he said, BTW we need to run now, i was like WHY, he says she just bought some special k, if you dont know dont ask, but its not good, so we took off, and once again i was all alone, oh well better alone than with some drugie chic. at least i found out before instead of after. i just wish i could meet a normal, nice, cute girl. oh well at least i got my friends. FRIENDS ARE GREAT.

[Angela 1]

Dunno if you do know what special K is but it is Ketamine a horse traquilliser.

 

I was watching a show about some dead club owner on tv and thats where I learnt

[cptwright 1]

yeah i knew what special k was, thanks anyway. that combined with another rumor, which was only that till that night, just made her very undesirable. oh well. well i found out that the academy starts july 1st in norfolk, so if i got it i should get a call within a week or so, and the peopel that looked at the house today loved it. they were there for a while, then went and seen the neighbor. he came to me and said he thinks its sold. god i hope so. well if so and my job comes through this could be the best week in my life, or in turn neither happens, and be one of the worst. OUCH. well wish me luck, i gotta go back to work now from lucnh have a good one.

 

PEACE

[cptwright 1]

well it was a pretty good weekend. had a good time withh my buddies.put a motor in a car today. but lisa still gives me a headache. one day shes great even for a little while. she knows were friends, only, and so on. but then suddenly she flips on me, and like today she tells me IM gonna regret this all someday. but SHE'S the one that started all this and put me in the position to leave, so whose gonna regret this, i thnik SHE more than ME. thank GOD for friends.

[Odo 0]

Hope everthing works out for you. Good Luck.

[cptwright 1]

well we got a couple of offers on the house yesterday, now were in the counteroffer point, plus someones coming to look at it tonight, and were having an open house sunday, so its looking good. still waiting to hear from norfolk, GOD i hope that comes soon, i really want that job.

[cptwright 1]

well we signed contracts on the house yesterday. got more than i hoped for thte house. now i just hope it all goes through without a hitch. had more drama today with lisa, just when things are good, we get along good as friends then she has to go on about how she wants me back, then make me feel bad for wanting to find my sense of sanity agaihn without goin back through the hell she put me through. is it so bad that after 15 years of just wanting her to be happy, and it not working, so i finally lost all sense of reality where my life is concerned that i just had to move on to try and find myself again? am i so bad for wanting sanity in my life, i mean i still care about her, try to always be there for her, and am 100% completely honest with her about how i feel, and that i just want to be friends, i mean after 15 years i just cant hate her and still wish her the best in life. why cant she just understand where i am coming from, after all she helped in no small way to put me where i am today. oh well sorry for ranting i know that once i move i will be able to move on so much more. well night all.

 

PEACE

[Jeanway 0]

LOOK, YOU GAVE IT 15 YEARS, IT DIDN'T WORK. Where love is concerned the heart wants what it wants, you can't argue with your heart. But time is the best remedy and try to keep busy with other things. I just went through this a while back and it's hard, I know, but you will get over it. If it's possible to have no contact with her that's even better. I know it hurts but it helps you get over her. Think with your head, not your heart. Good Luck Matt. We are all here for you if you need to talk. :P Now, go to bed and get some sleep! :P Or I'll sic Baby Tongue on you :oops:

[cptwright 1]

well the inspection and appraisal is this thursday. so if all goes well with the both of those the rest should be a walk in the park, i hope. so hows everything with you all, havent been on in a while. been busy with work, and play. gotta have both ya know. well by mid july latest ill be moving unless problems arise wtih the sale. the academys july 15th now, they start setting up physicals next week so hopefully ill be gettin a call soon. well ttyl.

 

PEACE

[cptwright 1]

hello all hows things, good i hope. havent been on in a while, probably will be mia still for a while. been busy with lots of things. still waiting to hera from norfolk, the house is sold, gotta wait for closing thanks to lisa, not much else different here though. well im beat, off to bed, ill be around time to time till i move. night all.

 

PEACE

[cptwright 1]

well its been a rather crappy day today. i heard that the list of new hires is out and im not on it. so i guess im done for as far as norfolk fire goes. oh ewll

[cptwright 1]

well today was the first day of the academy. it was only orientation so it wsnt so bad. we start pt on wed. so that'll be fun, its gonna take some getting used to the whole yes sir no sir, yes maam no maam, im used to just yeah or yep or yepper well that aint gonna cut it here. lol. but i just cant beleive im finally here, and lovin it. well i gotta go study a bit and go to bed, night all.

 

PEACE