Roddenberry Road

[Tina 0]

um ok

 

AT stands in her door way drinkin tea..She decides not to interfear with the hoopla across the street

[TrekkieMage 0]

Noticing AT, TrekkieMage decides to join her on the steps, seeing as TM has no idea what's going on and AT seems to have the right idea.

[DrWho42 13]

Since drwho42 didn't really want to get involved with the whole elves situation, he decided it was best to be reworking certain dimensions and what not to the point that his haunted mansion would regress back to its former-self.... Before the elves sent it aflame...

[Jeanway 0]

Jeanway watches Fen dissolve in a puddle of tears as he pulls the broken porcelan remains off the hood of his now demolished car. He looks at his smouldering remains of a house and begins to out and out . Spilling the remains of his beer down his front. "Looks like you pissed yourself pretty good Fen." She says to him " Got house insurance, I hope?" She asks. Nope, got cancelled from the last Cook-out/Block-Sale we had here last year. He answered. "Oh My" She said as she put her arm around his shoulder and gave him a reassuring squeeze. He looked at her, actually, kind of leered at her with a kind of sinister smile on his face. :lol: "Hey" She began. "Tell ya what Fen. Seeing the predicament your in why don't ya come on over and you can stay in that nice loft apartment over my garage til you can get your house fixed up, ok? That sound good to you? You can stay there for as long as you need to and you don't have to pay me any rent and I'll cook gourmet meals for you every night. Oh, and use the pool, the sauna, the pool-house with the movie room, a fully stocked refrigerator and freezer, the wet bar, and the hot-tub whenever you like, have all the visitors you want and here, take my Platinum Gold Card and go buy yourself a new wardrobe, on me. Oh and don't forget we have all those fruit trees out back too. If you need to you can borrow the Jag anytime. Mi casa es su casa, OK? Fen said nothing. Just a hint of a tear formed in his eye as he stopped crying and almost laughed out loud. "Oh Fen one more thing. I hope me and my girl-friends don't bother you early in the morning, we have a Yoga class out by the pool three mornings a week, then we all take the horses out for a run. You do like horses Fen, they're at your disposal anytime you feel like riding, there is a nice path though the woods down to the lake, I go down there alot and sunbathe, au natural. Your welcome to join me at my private beach, I just bought it last week.

[fenriz275 0]

Fenriz slips into the hottub at Jeanway's house. Letting the heat soothe him he tries to ignore the smell of smoke still coming from his house while he wonders what he'll do to thank Jeanway for her generosity. Flipping open his cell-phone he dials a number, "Hey, yeah this is me. You still holding that life-sized Worf coi pond/water fountain? Sweet, deliver it tomorrow." Watching his slightly charred rubber ducky bob around in the water, he soon falls asleep.

[Rivendells_king 0]

RK, seen that it was night changed his robe and decided it was time to send away the really annoying elves. Down the slopes of mount gene a trail of light could be seen, caused by the lanterns of the leaving elves. soon the elves started to walk through the town and the charnage that was lefts from the exploded car and alteregos traps. RK and his elves than reached the west road and RK waved them good bye. After that been over he went and got into jeanways hot tube with some other people. hey people whats up?

[nik 0]

Nik barrels down the road in his car filled with elves. One is standing on the seat beside him turning the wheel, while another is on the floor working the pedals. Nik is leaning back in his seat reading his autographed copy of "Exquisite Possum Recipes from Aroung the World." An elf calls from the back seat.

 

"Hey, fat boy! You got any tunes?" His high pitch voice sounds almost like a toy coming from the back seat.

 

"Shore do son!" Nik shouts above the roar of the muffler. Nik reaches under the seat and pulls out a box of eight tracks. "Help yourself son!" Nik bellows. "Got everything you could possibly want in there... Barry Manilow, Johny Cash, Dolly Parton, and even The King himself."

 

Another elf leans over the seat. "Hey Uncle Chubs! Look what I found!" He's holding a case of beer in his tiny hands. His green pointed hat falls across his face as he talks.

 

"Yeeeee hawwwww!" Nik bellows. "I got me a bonus when I bought this car! We'll drive on down to the quarry and have us a grand ol' time boys."

 

"How 'bout some chics, larda**! Let's get some women on the way." The elves cheer and holler at the suggestion.

 

"Heck, boy! Where we gonna put 'em? Don't worry little man! All they gotta do is see the Love Doctor going by in the Love Machine, and they'll come running."

 

The Gremlin tops out at a crushing 40 miles per hour as it approaches the edge of the quarry. "Hey! Hit the breaks pipsqueak!" Nik yells.

 

"I am, butterball! Nothing's happening!" The elf on the floor shouts.

 

"Aw, heck." Nik says..... "Don't worry boys! These things always happen when you get a big engine under the hood! Damn things just want to run away from ya! Alright everyone! Open the door and drag a foot!"

 

The doors and the hatch of the Gremlin open, and several little legs and one large one drag on the ground as the green car approaches the cliff. Three elves are holding the bumper dragging both feet on the ground, and another has his arms wrapped arounds Nik's leg as he drags his feet. Inside the car, and elf busies himself going through the glove compartment.

[Jeanway 0]

Jeanway, hot and tired dives into the deep end of the pool, then swims underwater the length and back. Hugging the coping at the deep end she calls to Fenriz. "Hey, how you doin over there, feeling any better?" He waves his can of beer in the air and yells "YEE HAW, AM I! You going to join me in here or do I have to come over there and get ya?" Jeanway climbs up the ladder and walks over to the hot-tub and slides down into the steam next to Fenriz. Just then RK comes walking into the backyard. Fenriz and Jeanway look at him then at each other. "Well, this is a surprise, come on in RK." Jeanway says. "You got anyone with you?" Fen and Jeanway hoping he's alone. "Nope, I'm alone." He says. He walks down the steps into the water and sits across from Fenriz. "I sent them all away and I brought you both something to help pay for all the damage they caused you." RK hands a small cloth sack to each of them. "It's $50,000. for each of you. I hope it will make everything right again." He says to them. Again Fenriz begins to cry as Jeanway hands hers to him and says "Well, looks like you can fix your house right away now." Fenriz looked at her like this :lol: I tear formed in the corner of each eye. "The Lord giveth and the Lord taketh away." He muttered to himself.

[Jeanway 0]

Within a week Fenriz's house was being repaired. Fenriz tried his darndest to make excuses why he hadn't tried to find contractors and get things going. Finally after a couple days, Jeanway got on the phone and started the ball rolling. "I don't know about these things Fen, you have to take charge now." She said to him. " Get your butt over there and get involved in what's going on." She told him. Fenriz, equally as inexperienced at home repairs and constuction, did as she asked and made his way over to his shambles of a house to try to supervise the workmen. UH OH :lol: Clutching a six-pack of Bud he entered his house. "Anyone want a beer?" He asked. To his surprise, one of the workmen was none other than his buddy nik. :) " Hey, how ya doin?" Fenriz asked nik as nik was busy pulling down the kitchen ceiling with a crow-bar. "Hey!, I was wonderin where you were." nik answered as he took a beer from Fenriz's hand.

[nik 0]

Nik takes the beer and slaps Fenriz on the back.

 

"Hey, come look what I did!" He says. He Fenriz walk to the front where Nik's Gremlin is sitting. However, it's been repaired and renewed. The rust is gone, and its lime green paint sparkles in the sun. An air intake manifold protrudes from the hood, and her vinyl seats have been replaced with Corinthian leather. Her steering wheel is a molded chain. A nitro cannister can be seen on the floor of the passenger seat. Flames have been painted down her sides, and a spoiler has been added to the back of her roof.

 

As Fenriz and Nik approach the Gremlin, her hatch is open and movement can be seen at the end. Three elves in hardhats are working. One holds blueprints, another sorts through the power tools, and the third is sitting on the bumper looking at an

adult magazine.

 

Nik opens the door and goes through a few items in the back seat.

 

"Hey, gimme that pneumatic drill, would ya pipsqueak?"

 

An elf passes up the drill. "There you go Crisco-butt!" He says, and then gets back to work. Nik looks at the elf reading the magazine.

 

"Hey, get back to work shorty, or I'll send you back to work for that slave driver at the North Pole!" Nik says jokingly. "Only two more hours 'til beer-thirty boys! Let's get this day finished!"

 

As Nik and Fenriz walk back to the house, the elves can be heard snickering. Nik rolls his eyes in the back of head, and removes a sign from his back. The sign read "Say no to crack" with a downward pointing arrow. Nik shakes his head and pulls his pants up in back.

[Jeanway 0]

Jeanway looks across her front yard as she waters her flower garden. "Oh No." She says outloud. She sees the elves and the newly painted lime green Gremlin sitting in Fen's driveway. A rustling behind one of her Begonias catches her eye. She sees two elves trying to light a match, one holding a small pipe in his mouth. "Get outa there!" She yells as she hard sprays them with the hose. They run, dropping the pipe and the book of matches. She picks them up off the ground and walks over to Fen's front door where Fen and nik are sitting, drinking beer and laughing at a picture in an adult magazine. Nik folds it up quickly and puts it behind his back. "Look at this!" She says as she holds the pipe and matches in her outstretched palm. "We can't be having this, we are a drug free neighborhood, there are kids out here playing, do something nik, they are working for you right?" Fen cowered on the step, not saying a word. "You'd better reign them in or your fired!!" :lol:

[fenriz275 0]

At Fenriz's house the next day all of the elves are lined up in front of a port-a-pot. Parked next to it is a yellow van with C & S drugscreening services written on the side in purple letters. Fenriz and nik look on while two gnomes, Crunch and Snaders supervise the testing. "I thought you specialized in elf removal?" Fenriz asks Crunch. "That's just a side-job we run. The real money's in drug screenin' these little buggers. Pointy eared little devils love their goofballs, if ya catch my meaning." the gnome answers. One by one the elves go into the toilet then exit, handing a small plastic cup filled with elf pee to Snaders, who labels each one before putting them into a case labeled "Samples". Nik, frustrated at the delay on the job kicks the side of the port-a-pot. "Hey you, ya little squirt hurry it up, we got us a lot a work to do on this here dump of a house before it's fit to live in again." nik bellows. "Shut yer hole lardbutt, I'm tryin'. Turn on a waterhose or something, I can't concentrate in here. What exactly you have for lunch anyway? Smells like something died in here!" the elf complains. Nik kicks the port-a-pot hard and threatens "Anymore lip from you and I'll ship you back to Santa in pinebox, ya little runt. Just fill up the cup and keep it shut." While the rest of the elf construction crew waits in line nik walks Fenriz over to his Gremlin, opening the trunk he shows Fenriz a few carpet samples, "I'm thinkin' orange and gold shag for the rumpus room. Something that really works with the faux wood paneling and mirror-ball, Ya know? For the master bedroom we do the whole room like one a them real nice brothels they gots on Bourbon Street, heart shaped bed, red shag carpet, and a wall of bubbles backlit by a couple a spotlights, Sweet eh?" nik explains. "Um....That's not exactly what I ..." Fenriz begins before he's cut off by nik who slaps him on the back. "Sweet, let's go get us a couple a beers." nik says.

[nik 0]

Nik walks up and down the line of elves in front of the porta-potty waiting for the drug-testing to finish. Two elves are arguing quietly in the line and shoving each other. As Nik marches up to them, he can hear their words.

 

"You didn't give me enough, I need more."

 

"There's not that much to go around. I need some for myself, too, y'know!'

 

"Just another ounce, pleeeeeeeeease!"

 

Nik grabs the elves by their ears. "What's goin' on here!" As he shakes the elves slightly, a small bottle falls out of one's coat. Nik picks up the bottle and looks at it. It contains a yellow fluid. He opens the container and sniffs it.

 

"Aw hell! What is this?" He demands.

 

The elf begins quivering. "Uh.... I paid some kid in the chess club $20 to whiz in a cup for me.... please don't send me back to Santa Clause!"

 

The other elf chimes in. "Yeah! Please don't send us back there! Big Red's a slave driver! He doesn't pay us enough, and he's always groping the lady elves. Sometimes he witholds our pay so he can buy cigarrettes and booze."

 

Nik considers for a minute...... "Alright," he says, "But I got somethin' better for you!" Nik picks up the elves by the scruff of the neck, walks to the Gremlin and tosses them in the back, slamming the hatch shut.

 

"Ill be back in an hour." He says. As he opens the driver's door, Snaders speaks up.

 

"You too, Nik." he motions to the porta-potty. Nik looks back at Snaders.

 

"You got it!" He says. He looks around quickly, then reaches into the back of the Gremlin for a gallon jug filled with ice-tea. He empties the jug onto the lawn and walks behind the Gremlin. His pants can be heard unzipping. He leans one hand on the Gremlin and the sound of trickling water can be heard.

 

"Mmmmmmmm." Nik leans his head back and closes his eyes. "Mmmmmm..... ahhhhhh........ whew........yep......." For a long time this continues, and then Nik finally exclaims, "Wow! I feel light headed." He walks back around the Gremlin with the gallon jug 3/4 full and screws the cap back on. He hands it to Snaders.

 

"There's plenty more where that came from!" He then returns to the Gremlin, starts the engine, and revs it several times.

 

"Be right back, y'all!" The Gremlin peels out of the lawn.

[Jeanway 0]

The following morning, Jeanway and her girl-friends, Tina, Angel, 3 of 7, Unicorn Hunter, mjham, Luthien, BlueCrystal, Queenie HeadBorg and Echo gather next to the pool at sunrise for their Yoga session. The air is warm and still, the birds are just waking up as the sun peeks through the trees in her backyard casting scattered rays of sunshine down onto them. The music of a Chinese bamboo flute and the Japanese koto plays sweetly as a mist hovers in the air around them. Jeanway's prize Clydesdales come out of the stable and watch the women stretch and move to the music, scratching and pawing at the ground with their massive hoofs, braying occasionally and banging their lips in the air as if they were trying to sing. The delicious aromas of incense and Jasmine hung in the misty morning air. All was peacful and serene.

[please delete 0]

It was so peaceful that Echo, being Echo fell asleep while doing yoga and fell backwards into the pond where the goldfish scattered away... The brisk splash of cold water woke her up. "Why am I doing Yoga in the pond?"

[Lady Luthien 0]

well, hmmm, hey fenrizz lets leave the dutch elf alone, she doesn,t seem to make much trubble

Gee thanks! :lol: .

The elves are my friends didnt u know?Go kill orcs and gremlins but no Elves.

Oh and Rivendells King youre treehouse looks very beautiful is it okay if I move in ?? :)

[Rivendells_king 0]

RK, woke up from a peaceful night sleep and woke up too his peaceful normal not annoying elves bringing him a great breakfest. After his breakfest RK looked out his window and surveyed roddenberry road. Know what we need to do RK asked a random elf. I know another invasion on roddenberry road. No you idiot RK replyed we need to have a big party. Soon there was a big banner prepared and letters read to be mailed to all residences of roddenberry road. Also a letter was sent out to lady luthien asking her to move into the big tree mansion.

 

 

The letter for the party said.

 

:lol: Come one and all to RK's big big grill out party thing. To night at cara organao! Be there or be squared!!

[Lady Luthien 0]

Also a letter was sent out to lady luthien asking her to move into the big tree mansion.

 

 

Lady Luthien off course agreed to that happily and helped into the kitchen preparing the meal for the festivities later that evening

[Jeanway 0]

When suddenly from around the house walks a group of Lady Elves :lol: Dressed in sweats and T-shirts and asked. "May we join you?" The shortest one asked after she meekly cleared her throat. All the excerise stopped and they all looked at each other and shrugged and nodded affirmatively. "Sure, come on in find a spot and let's begin again." Jeanway said. The ladies of the neighborhood each in turn began to instruct the elves in the various positions and the elves followed their instructions to the letter. For the rest of the morning the session went on. Frequently they would talk with each other and to themselves making comments like. " This is fun." and "You do this everyday, here?" Jeanway answered. "No just three morning a week, your invited to come as often as you like." All the elves stopped and with saddened faces began to weep. " We thought you didn't like us." One said outloud. All the women stopped and began comforting the lady elves. "Oh Honey, it's not that we don't like you. It's just the things your men do to us that we don't like. Look at the mess they've made of Roddenberry Road." One of the elves spoke up. "We try to tell them to behave, but you know how men are, don't you?" She said. All the women began nodding affirmativley and agreeing with them. " Those B*ast*rds! Messing things up for everyone. The lady elves and the regular women now were clearly agitated. The Yoga session stopped as they all retreated to the patio and lit their cigaretts and started chugging coffee and throwing down donuts. Talking loudly about men's behaviors.

[Lady Luthien 0]

When suddenly from around the house walks a group of Lady Elves :lol: Dressed in G-strings and T-Backs.

:) :wub: Dont think someone will EVER see me dressed like that,im an elf but i got so my priorities!! None of those kind of things for me,thats like askign me to wear a....a... skirt! :lol:

[DrWho42 13]

=Several Feet Beneath Roddenberry Road=

 

DrWho42 and a rather absurdly huge snail were searching for the recently reported mutated alligator underneath Roddenberry Road in the sewers...

 

"According to the news I've got, since the elves, gnomes, and gremlins arrived, it has reworked the food-chain of the sewers in an unexpected way..."

 

The snail, for some reason, equipped with a variety of Ghostbusters gear, is taking a PKE* reading. (*Psycho-Kinetic Energy)

 

"No, snail, all the paranormal activity has seemed to move to the deeper depths of the sewers and up towards my home and fenriz's... Anyways, we're looking for a gigantic mutated alligator... It might erupt from the sewers and out into the streets of Roddenberry Road!"

 

Snail grew bored and weary of DrWho42's talking so he tried thinking of ways of aggravating certain things, like the sewer mutants and what-not.

 

"I think this is where that mutant alligator is... :lol: Underneath the road next to Jean's house..."

[fenriz275 0]

Fenriz is trying to finish up a little electrical work on his house when a gigantic mutant alligator rips it's way up through the floor. Smashing the thing on the head with a wrench Fenriz hightails it out of the house and down the street, the disgruntled reptile on his heels. "Crap, what else can go wrong?" Fenriz asks no one in particular as he fights off the alligator with a wiffle-ball bat and a trash can lid. Tired of being swatted in the face the alligator disappears down a open man-hole back to it's fetid subterranean home. Calling it a night Fenriz returns to the loft above Jeanway's garage and watches a C.H.i.P.s marathon on TV until he falls asleep drooling all over himself.

[ILIKESEVEN 0]

a little poeëm by ILS

 

"she lives across the street

in a big wooden white painted buildig,

I saw her in the shower reaching for some soap,

I knew she had to be the girl for me,

and to think i proberbly never,

would have found her,

if i had not bought that telescope"

 

[Lady Luthien 0]

haha good one ilikeseven!

[Jeanway 0]

a little poeëm by ILS

 

"she lives across the street

in a big wooden white painted buildig,

I saw her in the shower reaching for some soap,

I knew she had to be the girl for me,

and to think i proberbly never,

would have found her,

if i had not bought that telescope"

 

:P

 

 

[Jeanway 0]

"Sure, why not?" Jeanway says on her cell as she watches the alligator go down the man-hole. "Maybe you can help" She ends her call and walks to her driveway. when in front of her, in mid air, a sparkleing flash appears then hovers, soon joined by a second, then a third then a dozen. Her distant cousins "The Pixies" have arrived. :P They twitter all around her, blowing kisses some landing on her shoulders. "How you all doin?" Jeanway says as she laughs and kisses them back. "I've missed you." She says.

[Rivendells_king 0]

RK was watching the news in his mansion on roddenberry road with luthien. kNow what bob there is a swarm of tribble hai that have been destroying everying in there path heading twoards roddenberry road, o I did not know that carla lets show the vewiers the swarm. Soon the TV screen is full of fury things with black leather wings and red eyes, breathing fire on everything.

 

First my uncontroable elves, then gnomes, dwarves, germlins, mutant alligators, pixies and now tribble hai. Man this town is doomed. RK said to hims self. Well its time to open the armory and board up the windows the swarm is coming.

[DrWho42 13]

First my uncontroable elves, then gnomes, dwarves, germlins, mutant alligators, pixies and now tribble hai. Man this town is doomed. RK said to hims self. Well its time to open the armory and board up the windows the swarm is coming.

=Still in the Sewers of Roddenberry Road=

 

Still traveling amid the dark and foggy tunnels of the ancient sewers underneath Roddenberry Road, DrWho42 and the gigantic snail hear a loud crashing sound emanates from above...

 

*Snail panics, and starts shooting aimlessly at everything with his Proton Pack.*

 

"Snail! We just don't go on shooting at anything when we hear something unnatural about... And anyways... WE'RE NOT HUNTING GHOSTS!!!"

 

*Snail takes a shot at Who42, and wanders off in the other direction to a tunnel heading downwards*

 

*sigh* And so DrWho42 follows Snail deeper into the sewers, without the knowledge that one of the gigantic mutant alligators escaped from the sewers and out onto the surface-world of Roddenberry Road.

 

As they journey ever deeper and deeper to the darkest depths of the intricate networks of passages and unknown structures left behind from other diggers and constructors, they find an eerie swamp with a glowing water-fall of glowing bright-green.

 

In a strange, and ancient voice not seeming to come from that of anything human...

"Who goes there?"

 

From under some marshes, and vines, was an odd sewer mutant that seemed to have been partially garbage, tree, and what mocked being human.

 

DrWho42 stepped forward, and announced: "We are certain travellers searching for a mutant alligator, in hope that it will not threaten the surface-dwellers..."

 

The weird being then spoke, as he made sounds akin to a broken chair: "There are many monsters that lurk the sewers of this realm... Why would you be interested in searching for some big gator?"

 

"Ehm... We're bored... And plus, I think I heard it was creating chaos with everything else up there... Anything we can do to stop it?"

 

The mutant shrugged. "I don't know... Neither do I care... Go try your luck elsewhere..."

 

And so snail and DrWho42 made their way back up to the streets above.

[Jeanway 0]

Jeanway just sits and holds her head. "OH MY!" :P Since Fenriz's plumbing got blown apart and that mutant alligator chase and now with the Pixies arrival. Baby Tongue witnessed the chase and has taken up residence behind the couch. She won't come out for at least 3 days. A Monitor is no match for an Alligator.

 

She decides to go for a ride down to the lake. She goes to the stable and as she enters says "HI, Babe" to Hagrid. "How's my big boy doin?" As she smothers his beak with kisses and pats his side. She grabs a blanket, throws it on his back, then a small saddle, cinches the strap tight around his enormous middle. Puts her foot in the stirrup then pulls herself up onto her hawk-headed, horse-bodied, winged beast. "Go Haggie" She says to him as she holds the reigns and jabs at this side with her heel. They thunder out of the stable door and down the path through the woods. Upon entering a meadow on the way, Haggie decides he wants to stretch his wings. He unfolds both his wings and gives a might flap and they are in the air. Flying over the trees, the lake in clear view. Jeanway turns her head and looks back at Roddenberry Road, some smoke still rising from small fires that decided they wouldn't go out. She pulls on on one side of Haggie's reigns and he turns and flys towards the road. She flys down the whole length of Roddenberry Road to survey the damage. "OK, I've seen enough." She says to Haggie. Your just the best little Hippogriff is this whole world. Lets go to the lake." Haggies gives out a deafening squawk and turns again towards the lake. They disapoear in a streak and a flash

[please delete 0]

Echo bumps into DrWho42 in the street. She notices that he is putting the sewer cover over the smelly hole in the ground called a sewer. "Ben what were you doing in the sewer... it smells a little rancid down there. With all that murky green chemical filled water. oh, just to let you know I took apart the TARDIS... just kidding."