Corrupt a wish

[athena28 2]

Granted, but then next day is Father's Day, the next day is Halloween, the next day is Christmas, the next day is St. Patrick's day....

 

I wish people wouldn't gossip so much.

[He Who Shall Not Be Named 2]

Granted. We only gossip about you.

 

I wish my nose hairs would stop growing.

[RikerChick 5]

Granted. All that hair is now coming out your ears.

 

I wish we had central AC in our house.

[He Who Shall Not Be Named 2]

Granted, but you go to hell because central air is a sin. (They said so in the Kevin Smith movie Dogma.)

 

And ear hair is preferable to nose hair.

 

I wish... I wish the new season of Battlestar Galactica would begin already.

Edited March 3, 2008 by ddillard

[athena28 2]

Granted, but it's only 1 episode this year.

 

I wish my chicken would cook thoroughly.

[SeeingEyeBorg 0]

Granted, by the hormones the chicken was raised on cause you to sprout a third boob.

 

I wish...I wish I made more money.

[Wishfire 2]

Granted. Here's a penny.

 

I wish Anne Coulter's head would spontaneously combust on live television while I'm watching.

[RikerChick 5]

Granted, but then she'd sprout two heads in it's place. :biggrin:

 

I wish my knees weren't so sore.

[KIMIMELA 1]

Granted, take some painkillers, take my crutches and go to my therapy classes.

 

I wish I had a bottle of clear pure healthy water in my hand right now.

[A l t e r E g o 9]

Granted, but you gag and choke to death while drinking it.

 

I wish I had my old car back.

[He Who Shall Not Be Named 2]

I wish I had my old car back.

Granted, but the stereo is gone, the tires are slashed, there is sugar in the gas tank, someone tagged it, the windows are broken, and you have 100 overdue parking tickets.

 

I wish Alterego would let me post dirty comments and pictures.

[SeeingEyeBorg 0]

It took a lot of dark mojo to grant this, but hey...granted.

 

However, Alterego in turn posts pix of you performing every dirt act you comment about.

[He Who Shall Not Be Named 2]

It took a lot of dark mojo to grant this, but hey...granted.

 

However, Alterego in turn posts pix of you performing every dirt act you comment about.

 

Granted, but you have to look at the pix.

 

I wish I could perform every dirty act I comment about.

[athena28 2]

Granted, but you're so covered in filth it's painful to be around you.

 

I wish I could decide what to do next.

[jadziaezri 0]

Granted, But its sword eating

 

I wish I won the lotto jackpot

[oldfan1 0]

Granted, but it's the Nigerian lottery.

 

I wish my Gatorade was colder.

[jadziaezri 0]

Granted now its frozen and you can't drink it

 

I wish money grew on trees

[He Who Shall Not Be Named 2]

Granted, but because money (I assume you mean currency instead of "money" which is an abstract concept that is *represented* by currency) is so plentiful it sets off hyperinflation, everything costs more, the purchasing power of the money shrinks, and your salary doesn't keep pace with rising prices.

 

I wish Corina would have sex with me.

[Bethlehem 7]

Granted, But you have to wait till she is 80 years old. By that time she will be glad about the age difference. :)

 

I wish they would make a Green Acres Movie.

[He Who Shall Not Be Named 2]

Done, but it will be a "reimagining" as an action-thriller, and they will make Arnold the pig a female chicken.

 

I wish my dentist's receptionist would learn how to schedule an apointment properly.

Edited June 30, 2010 by Lt. Van Roy

[jadziaezri 0]

She does, but not for you

 

I wish I could spend more time with my children

[Bethlehem 7]

Granted with as much good and happy times as possible.

 

Wish my kids were babies again ( but just for a few hours )

[jadziaezri 0]

Granted, but you have to change diapers again

 

I wish I didn't have to work until 1am

[He Who Shall Not Be Named 2]

Granted, But you have to wait till she is 80 years old. By that time she will be glad about the age difference. :)

 

I'm sure at that point she'll be modeling for AARP and complaining about all these 100 year old men hitting on her.

 

I wish I didn't have to work until 1am

 

Granted. You're fired.

 

I wish my friend Tom's annual (somewhat anyway) feast wasn't canceled this year. Tom is the best Cajun chef this side of the Mississippi but the gulf spill is causing a seafood shortage.

Edited July 2, 2010 by Lt. Van Roy

[jadziaezri 0]

Granted, but because of the shortage he makes you mac and cheese

 

I wish I wasn't eating mac and cheese

[He Who Shall Not Be Named 2]

Granted. I'm eating your mac & cheese (the good kind that is baked, not that Kraft crap).

 

I wish I was licking ice cream off the stomach of a biker chick in a bikini.

[Bethlehem 7]

Granted, but she only bathes once a year and you are licking her the day before her annual bath.

Yuk wish I had something for my sick stomach. :) :)

[Kor37 9]

Granted but it involves an enema.

 

I wish I didn't have to work every holiday

[jadziaezri 0]

Granted, your out of business

 

I wish I had staff that knew what they are doing

[He Who Shall Not Be Named 2]

Granted. One of them is your boss now.

 

I wish I didn't have to shave.