Lursa's Personal Log (Part2)

[Lursa 0]

Oh yeah, by the way, I learned how to make your text glow it is very easy:

 

type your text

 

I will be doing this until i forget lol.

 

no spaces it must be all together in order for it to work!

[Spockstellaiter 0]

:biggrin: I love the glowy fonts!

[KIMIMELA 1]

i can't see it with this new broswer :biggrin:

[Lursa 0]

Stardate: 0504.7

 

My friend last night was acting like i (Please stop me from cursing) and i hope that he changes his way. His name is Andy and well I used to like him alot and then he broke my heart. But that is another story. He has a girlfriend but he asked another girl and then he asks me for help. I think that he just wants to be a pimp and that is wrong. I personally feel bad for his girlfriend but then things will work out between them.

 

I'm am figuring out a scary thought. I am beginning to understand myself as a person and not to be afraid of that notion either. Well since i can't figure out anything else to type i need to finish up my english paper.

 

Lursa out.

[Lursa 0]

Oh yeah by the way I hope that you guys like my new sig:

 

[Spockstellaiter 0]

Yeah, kewl poster

[Lursa 0]

Stardate: 0504.8

 

Spockstellaiter thanks alot I like it as well! I am almost done with season one of TNG which is a great series. My favorites characters are Troi,Riker,Laforge, and of course the great John-Luc Picard. But my all time favorite episode of TNG would be A last day in Paris. John-Luc had to confront a former lover that he left behind and didn't say goodbye. I got some photos of me and Rob and we look good together! Everyone keeps on telling me that we will be together someday. But love can be a crazy game.

 

Well, my weekend will be full of homework and i just hope that i can get it done.

 

Lursa out.

[MrPsychic 1]

Not to sound snobby Lursa, but the episode was "We'll Always Have Paris" and it's Jean-Luc Picard. :P But I hope you and Rob can be together. :P

[Spockstellaiter 0]

OOh, show us! (da rob and you pix!)

[Lursa 0]

Stardate: 0504.9

 

Yesterday I found that i got expected to do the exchange program at my school the students will be coming to school on the 12th. We will go to there school the following week. Rob has not called me back yet, and well I am not worrying. I have alot of other stuff to do but Prom is almost here I can't help but mention it alot. I love going to it with him he is alot of fun, but can be serious sometimes that is good thing sometimes lol. He shows me things than I show him stuff it is cool that we learn off of each other. Learning is a great tool, that is often abused.

 

What is interesting to me is that so many girls in my school abuse it. We are given a free education that is often seemed as hard to get in other countries such as India and Japan. Both of these countries use education in a competitive sence. But for me I will stay in school as long as i can. The more I learn, the better off I will be in this corrupt society.

 

Lursa out.

[Lursa 0]

Stardate:0504.13

 

I just started to do a video about my life. The idea came to me in my sleep. It would be really cool to do that. Then one teacher then got mad at me and yelled at me like usual. teacher can be such a pain that you wish they were dead. But I will calm and collective. James a friend of mine came up to me and humped me! I told him to stop it and then he made it worse and then my teacher thought that we were doing more than being friends. I thought to myself it's all good lol.

 

It is so hard to be me sometimes. I wish I was dead sometimes my depression is coming back. It's that loneiness that is killing me right now. Not being able to hang out with friends is drving me crazy. But I bet you are wondering what took me such a long time to make another log. Well, that is due to me being busy with all of the senior crap that i really don't want to do. I'm tired of doing homework and having to deal wit all of the useless info that comes from the dictionary lol.

 

Well, I am starting to get tired and i'm listening to the Buffy soundtrack lol. Goodnight my friends.

 

Lursa out.

[Lursa 0]

Stardate: 0504.15

 

Crocheting has become a new passion for me I enjoy learning about making cool stuff that would usually cost me 20 dollars or more. At first i did'nt get it at all how it worked. But then I was determined to find out how to do it at any cost. I stopped working on my documentary on a variety of reason. My school was really giving me a hard time about it so i didn't want to push it anymore. As much as i would love to do it I can't anymore.

 

Prom is almost here and I don't have all of my stuff together. Rob, if I am sure he is going to be my date because the guy that I wanted to take was like really mean to me. He was my second choice rob was my first choice. Well, friday is here and shopping here i come.

 

Lursa out.

[Lursa 0]

Stardate:0504.20

 

I had no idea that i had to go to a different enivorment. I had the chance to go milwaukee high school of the arts. The school is deciated to the arts unlike my school which is deciated to people who don't care lol. This is school is alot of fun, races of all kinds care and respect to each other. I wish that i could feel that love at my school. I am the only black in my senior class, so it is hard to make friends at my school. Usually, people ignore me and act like i'm not there so today it was different.

 

I felt like i belonged. It was so cool to see the guys hitting me for a change lol. Instead of thest super-skinny girls that the media had made as the rolemodels for all girls. I'm not going to lie I am a big girl, who keeps herself in shape due to exerise and mediatation. For once, love is an all-around thing. It is sad that our society puts this "mind-frame" into young girls causing them to feel bad about themselves. My parents were also pissed off at me today for being late for class and they would not let me sleep at all it sucked.

 

When parents become annoying, you begin to stop loving them and that is what happened to me today. A werid day where i got alot of phone numbers and I hope that I keep in touch with these people.

 

Lursa out.

[Lursa 0]

Stardate:0504.21

 

Friday is almost here and i can't wait to talk to some of my friends who are not dating right now. Anime League forums are great and i love posting on them as well. I am almost done with the trek book that i am reading it will fun today also we will be mediatating in sociology class. Personally, i do it all the time but there is nothing better that a little R&R. Espeically i can't wait to see my love my friend rob once again. his love touches my soul and makes me feel complete. I will write some poetry for him and at a slow time at the dance, I will pull him aside and read it to him. It will be a magical moment. Also, I had a strange dream last night as well.

 

We are at the dance and i look great in my outfit it was renassiance-like.He looked great as well and well there was nothing more than i wanted was to be with him. Then he tooked me in his arms and kissed me. That's when i woke up.

 

Lursa out.

[Lursa 0]

Stardate: 0504.26

 

I am really happy that i was promoted to captain. It is a great honor to be a part of this site so it has been a very long time. You know it is really werid how life treats you. I only have one friend who is talking to me. Well I will screw them all!!!!!! (evil laugh). I told them that i was not going to prom with Rob and this will be great to see the stupid looks on there faces when i am here with him. Also, I had the chance to see him on Sunday, and well it was so great to see him again.

 

To hug him, to feel the warmth of his body but it seemed like he was not oh so happy to see me because he was really tired and out of it. The whole family was they just came (well his parents from china to go on a trip.) It is one of the places that I really want to go so it was so cool to hear about it from his father. His dad is a very interesting man and cares about me very much. So does Robert, When he looks at me her pireces through my soul.

 

That is the great thing about life there is always the one person that can make you happy no matter what. I am not really in the mood to type in glow text and not for a long time ya know. It makes me really sad that not alot of people care about me. I've been caring for myself for way too long it is time for me to rest and relax. 24/7 I am on the road with no stops. Now that is crazy. The kids at school are not making any better for me and it does not even want me to go to prom. But to get some payback for all the crap that they put me through it is about time.

 

This is my last year, senior year, and i want to be free and finally to become a person and not what my parents or family wants me to be. I hate my job, and i will change it and i am even applying for another job in the summer and also durning the school year. I really need the money for college. James is still acting really werid, and well i am going to stay away from him. I tried to make him feel better and the whole works and well somethings are better left to heal on there own.

 

Alot has happened since my last and i am trying to keep up to date.......

 

 

Computer end log........

 

Lursa out......

[Spockstellaiter 0]

Sorry you're feeling lonely B) good luck at the prom w/ rob! B)

[Odo 0]

Lursa

We are all not only friends here but family.

Maybe a large extended family but family. You can talk to anyone.

Well most anyone like any family we have the weird uncles and

cousins B) . But for the most part we look out for one another

you need to talk about anything PM one of us.

B)

[Madame Butterfly 0]

Lursa,

 

I understand exactly how you feel.

 

I had a very similar experience in high school and with my family.

 

I was the tail end of a large family, and the brother before me was the challenging one, and my Mom especially was just wiped out from it, and it nearly ended my parents marriage. And my Mom was just not in the frame of mind to parent me with the same love and devotion my older siblings received.

 

I felt alone for years.

 

There were many a time when I felt that life wasn't worth living, especially if my Mother didn't love me.

 

I'm so glad that I've learned to love myself, and life has gotten tremendously better.

 

I am so blessed.

 

You are not alone.

 

We are all here.

 

We care.

[Lursa 0]

Stardate: 0504.30

 

Well it is the day of the month, so I will try to make this short and sweet. First off, I would like once again to thank all the people that have supported me on this website it is so great to know that so many people care about me. We are a family, just like odo said, you are all like my brothers and sisters and i love you very much. Shopping was such a pain in the a$$ I don't get why prom shopping have to be like this. Parents don't make it easier at all. They still want you to look like child, but they want you to grow up.

 

This week coming up will go slow; that is for sure. I'm still not feeling better but as you can see i've changed my signature for sure. I like it alot! It reflects my Klingon nature that no matter what I can be a wild and sexy like them. Worf and Lursa are my favorites (lol) I'm so sorry that I missed the Trivia chat because I really want to move up in rank. Strength, duty,and honor that is all that I needed. I'm even learning how to speak Klingon as well. I might speak some to Robert, and see what he thinks lol. Besides I wrote a beaiuful poem for him as well.

 

Like troi said it best, he is my Imadazi (my beloved) and a truely a great friend. I had a werid dream about him, he kissed me durning prom night I wonder what that means (wink,wink, wink lol). Well I am going to finish watching TNG season 2.

 

End log...............

 

Lursa out.

[Lursa 0]

Stardate: 0505.02

 

This is crazy!!!!!!!!! May is here already and i had to make my sig smaller but some of them seem so big for sigs but oh well i don't care. Rules are rules. Most of my weekend was spent on getting stuff for prom which was also a pain in the butt. Shoes and jewelry are the worst. We were at it all day, I was so bored. Then I call Rob and he is like "you will have to do better than that."

 

I will show him that I took alot of time to get ready for this. He will stay at the house all night until morning. It will be great to spend time like this with him, because I really don't get to see him alot due to school and him being busy like myself all the time. But I want to hang out with me. But I hope that my dream that I had with him will come true.

 

To feel his lips against mine what a dream...........what a fantasy lol.

 

Lursa out.

[MrPsychic 1]

I bet you'll look beautiful Lursa. Have fun at the prom!

[Odo 0]

Lursa

You will have nothing to worry about. You will out shine everyone.

You are not only a star but a guideing light.

Here is your first bouquet

[Lursa 0]

Stardate: 0505.03

 

Thanks so much guys for your caring support. It is good to know that there are so many people that care about me. I can't wait for prom to come I will even start a countdown as well because Rob will once again look so hot. I need to tell him how I feel about him because this may be the one chance that i have that could never come again. Love is indeed a crazy thing, but I have to try and make this work.

 

My mother is still working on modifing my outfit and this is going to rock because I am ready for this and I will rock is world for sure. He is a great person and I don't feel complete without him beause he is such a good friend. Well, I have work today and I hate my job. It really sucks because half of my friends are leaving.

 

Why do all of the people that i care about have to leave me? I feel so alone right now......... But when rob comes over everything will be reveal no matter what the events will occur. One thing is for sure this will be a night that i will never forget.........

 

Lursa out.

[Lursa 0]

Stardate: 0505.04

 

My feelings for mother earth have changed. I can feel her pain, her remorse I want to change for myself and for the world. We waste so much money on useless stuff that I don't get it sometimes I don't have much to say os i will contiude this later.

[A l t e r E g o 9]

[Lursa 0]

Stardate:0505.04

 

Since I am doing my homework I might as well take a break. This whole i have been working my a$$ off for these stupid teachers. Sometimes I wish that all of my teachers would die and ever come and bother me ever again. A part of me just wants me to give up and not have anything with high school for a while. But now, it is time to fight back and once again the kids try to make me feel like crap. But this time, I frought back, and them just what they didn't expect. But most people can get mad at you for the talents that you pocess. Robert on the hand, can't come to my gradutation and i really wanted him to come and see my get my dipolma and i hate the fact that he won't be there. My heart will feel like a part of me is missing as well as my soul.

 

We also decided to not go to post-prom we be stupid at some dumb bowling alley, so he will be coming to my house and staying with me. We need to talk and this maybe the last time i will have to do this. Make it good, make it good I want him to see that I deeply care for him. I would do anything for him he is my Imazi and will ever change this. Saturday is coming so slow, that it is killing me. I have to still take my hair down and get it redone. Prom prep does take alot out of you.

 

Lursa out.

[Lursa 0]

Stardate: 0505.05

 

What a werid number I wonder what will happen when it will become 666 lol. Oh being of satan, come out and play with your children lol. No I am dark as the night and my mind has snapped once again. I don't want this life sometimes I prefer to see the utter shell of darkness. Those who get in my way, i will finish them. Andrew is the person for this punishment. He never calls me I always have to call him and it pisses me off majorly. I can't stand the fact that he spends more time with his girlfriend and yet he forgets his friends.

 

Robert from time to time does it this all the time and it is drving me crazy in the first place. Why do people always have to act like they are better than everyone else? We all are equal in God eyes, yet in our society we are put into levels and class. I want revenge more than anything, I want him to see my pain to feel it to see that what he did to me was wrong and asking out another girl while you're with me is wrong in the first place.

 

Saturday is coming close, and I want to walk in that room and look my damed best i tell ya what. The other girls will look like *poopie* and well that is my objective. I want to cringe when they see me, to feel that they are nothing and I am something to be fear. Fear can be a great tool, if you know how to use it right.

 

End log

 

Lursa

[Odo 0]

Lursa

I meant what i said above.

Your star will shine bright. You will be Cinderella they all will be the

ugly stepsisters.You and your prince charming. Will steal the night.

[Lursa 0]

Thanks odo. You must really care about me that means alot. Thank you for your support so far.

[Odo 0]

Not so far Always.

We are family here Nobody picks on my sister nobody.