Kyra_Ashleigh's Personal Log...

[Escobar 0]

how often is too often to call someone you're interested in?

I am soooo not an expert in these kind of things. I have not ever been able to become, and just stay, rrrrrealy good friends with a women. In my experience, you will not be able to just stay good friends with your friend, if you feel like I think you feel. It will just be a matter of time for something to happen. And since thats how it is in my mind, I think you should pick a good moment, and try to effect wich way the relation with your friend goes. But I can imagine you wan't to wait till your devorce is official. Mind, this is just my world... :P

 

And I hope your daughter will get well soon.

[Kyra_Ashleigh 0]

In my experience, you will not be able to just stay good friends with your friend, if you feel like I think you feel. It will just be a matter of time for something to happen. And since thats how it is in my mind, I think you should pick a good moment, and try to effect wich way the relation with your friend goes.

 

I agree with you completely. Right now I'm just playing it safe so I don't mess up a good friendship.

 

I think right now it's most important for me to try and respect his feelings, above all else. Like I mentioned, he just broke up with a very controlling girlfriend who watched his every move while they were together... I'm currently divorcing a man who was just as controlling. Neither of us would be doing ourselves any good by jumping into a relationship too soon.

 

As for now, I consider myself extremely lucky to have such a reliable, supportive person for a friend. You can't really ask for more than someone who will be there for you when you need advice or a shoulder to cry on. If our friendship turns romantic later, it's just an added bonus! :P

[Lursa 0]

I am expert of these kind of things. Right now don't bother him. There will come a time where if you are meant to be together then it will happen. Alot of people say this about me and Rob we didnt meet for no reason.

[Kyra_Ashleigh 0]

Well, it's the weekend and it's pouring down rain here.

 

I'm hoping my guy friend ended up deciding that camping this weekend wasn't a good idea... otherwise, he's stuck in a leaky tent with a bunch of his friends from work right about now.

 

I have no plans as of right now... my thrill for the evening is going to be shaving my legs and taking a hot bath. Whoo-hoo! :angry:

 

One of my girlfriends emailed me that our friend Rick's band is playing tonight. I might go to that, but I'm not sure... I'm going to wait and see if anyone else has better ideas for the evening. Rick's a nice guy but his band is simply awful!

 

Well, I'm going to go put my feet up and relax... then go take my hot bath. Maybe my friend will call, who knows?

[Escobar 0]

I consider myself extremely lucky to have such a reliable, supportive person for a friend. You can't really ask for more than someone who will be there for you when you need advice or a shoulder to cry on.

 

Good for you. :P I hope you both get through this period well.

[Kyra_Ashleigh 0]

Hmm... I haven't updated lately, mainly because it seems like there's nothing interesting happening in my life.

 

I got paid today! Whoo-hoo! :lol:

 

Other than that, things are pretty much the same. My ex is trying to get me to help him look up a bunch of information he wants as part of his political hobby. He'd be upset about me using the word hobby, but he's got no chance of actually succeeding in politics, so that's the word that works best. :P

 

My friend "L" is giving me fits. I don't really think he wants to talk to me. He just today told me that he was going to be off on vacation all of next week. Gee, you'd think a friend might mention something about taking a week's vacation. :P

 

I guess I should just give up on the idea of making plans with him anytime soon. The guy seems to be booked up for months and never tells me of his plans.

 

It wouldn't be so bad except for most of my female friends are either married or have steady boyfriends now and I have nobody to go out with on weekends. So I either go out alone and be bored or stay home and be bored. It stinks. :P

[Kyra_Ashleigh 0]

Well, I think I'm going to do something ground-breaking tonight. I'm going to go out to a club alone and not sit at home waiting for "L" to call me.

 

I looked around and couldn't find anything that sounded fun, so I picked a random club off the list and I'm going to go and hope the band doesn't stink like so many new groups do. I'm a bit bummed out though, a singer I really like is playing a show (like, right now), but I got off work too late to be able to come home and change and get over there for the show. Sometimes I really hate living so far away from everything!

 

My ex invited me over for the evening, but I don't think that's a good option for spending a Friday night. I was talking to him on the way home from work and mentioned that I might stop and buy some beer.... he says, "Come over! Bring the beer here!"

 

Ok, he doesn't want me to come over, he wants me to buy him beer.

 

I'm still tossed up between the biker bar with the 80's cover band and the country western karaoke bar. Hmmm. I've been to both before and I know people who go to both places though I think it's unlikely that I'll run into anyone I know.

 

It's tough sometimes, when I was younger, there was never a lack of things to do on a Friday night. Now I don't even know who half these new bands are and I hate going to a club and paying to get in if I know nothing about the band. I guess I should take heart though, I asked a bunch of people at work what was cool to do on a Friday night and none of them had any suggestions either.

 

Well, wish me luck with my evening.

[A l t e r E g o 9]

 

 

*resits being preachy*

 

Good luck Kyra.

[Kyra_Ashleigh 0]

Alterego... you've got me curious as to what you really wanted to say to me. You are welcome to send me a PM if you wish!

 

I stayed home last night, I got talking to my ex on the phone and decided it was too late to go anywhere after that.

 

I'm being good. Really I am.

 

Well, I'm outta here... I promised my friend "L" that I would come over and clean his kitchen and bathroom. Actually I think this is his excuse for asking me to bring a package to him that was sent to my workplace. Either way, he mentioned something about hanging around in his hot tub. Hmmm.

 

But yes, I am running over to a guy's house in order to clean it for him! :o

[A l t e r E g o 9]

Just that biker bars can be rough (but you probably knew that) sometimes and to be careful.

[Kyra_Ashleigh 0]

Thanks for your concern! I do really appreciate it! I'm very careful when I go out to only go to places I've been with friends before and feel comfortable in.

 

I just got home from my friend's place. I cleaned his bathroom and kitchen for him and he and his son made us dinner. It was a very nice evening. Then we went and sat in his condo's hot tub for a while. It was very relaxing. :o

 

Oh, and my friend looks really nice in nothing but a pair of shorts.

[Kyra_Ashleigh 0]

Well, it's Monday.

 

I have been suffering a bit of insomnia the last few days. Between the fact that I have a lot on my mind and the time change, I doubt I'll sleep well for a week or so before things go back to normal. B)

 

I have to go to a required parenting seminar tonight as part of the divorce. Everyone who has kids and wants a divorce in our county has to go to this thing. It's going to be a long seminar too, I have to sign in at 3 and then it lets out around 8:30. So I took the day off work for this thing.

 

I spent my Sunday browsing at the local bookstore. I got a Dean Koontz book for relaxing with and a book on relationships. I had to buy it.. it had a chapter called "why doesn't he call me?" B)

 

I saw it and just had to buy it. It promises lots of good tips on how long to wait to call a guy and how to call a guy so he doesn't think you're being clingy. It also has the various steps in a relationship that lead to commitment. I'm a bit scared by what the book says from what I have read so far. Apparently I am doing everything wrong! :P

 

Well, not really, but it seems that from the sterotypes of men and women presented in the book that I basically have a male personality, which can be either a good thing or a bad thing when dating.

 

And it seems my "friendship" with "L" is firmly planted in the "give him space" stage. Oh well, he was telling me he wanted me to come over more, so I suspect/fear that this is going to lead to the "serious relationship" stage that we had both agreed we weren't looking for.

 

So, it looks like I'm going to favor my instincts over the self-help book, but at least it has some good hints in it. B)

[Escobar 0]

So, it looks like I'm going to favor my instincts over the self-help book, but at least it has some good hints in it.

 

I think it can be amusing reading how you should handle things, while still going your own way. I think it can help reflect on your behavior, while not HAVING to change things. :biggrin:

[Kyra_Ashleigh 0]

Well, it's Thursday and "L" hasn't called me. I finally called his place to ask if he and his son would like to go to a concert with me on Saturday, but nobody answered, so I guess they're off doing guy things.

 

Either way, I have plans to go to a concert Saturday evening. It's a band called Novatone that my friend made me go see a few months back. They are such a good band... I'm really excited that they are playing! My girlfriends are going to be there, so I won't be alone if I can't get someone else to come with me. :P :P

 

I'm thinking I might not get to see "L" this weekend if I go out Saturday, but I'm not going to spend my weekend sitting at home waiting for him to call. Besides, I intended to invite him... if I can't reach him, it's his problem! :P

 

Well, two more workdays for me. I'm getting a little sick of my job, but it always happens at the end of the week! Time to get to bed early. :P

[Kor37 9]

I certainly hope this guy doesn't call you just when he needs his house cleaned!

[Kyra_Ashleigh 0]

I certainly hope this guy doesn't call you just when he needs his house cleaned!

 

Me too! :P

 

We've been friends for a long time and he needed a favor, ya know? :P

[Escobar 0]

Well, good for you you're not just waiting for him. Hope you have a good time saterdaynight, Kyra. Have fun.

[Kyra_Ashleigh 0]

I visited my sweetie last night. It seems like every time I get really impatient for him to call me, he calls the next day! :P

 

I'm tired right now... I stayed out way too late and no I have to get ready for work! :P

 

I'm looking forward to the concert tonigt. I still don't know which of my friends are going besides the two friends who always go to concerts. I'm hoping "L" will come and bring his son, but he may be too tired today. We talked for hours last night. :P

[KIMIMELA 1]

Enjoy the concert!!! :P

[Kyra_Ashleigh 0]

Enjoy the concert!!! 

 

Thanks! I had a great time with my girlfriends!

 

I ended up going dateless since "L" had a family thing he needed to be home for. I missed him a little bit, but I was so busy with my friends that it wasn't hard for me to be there without him.

 

It's much easier to brag about a "semi-boyfriend" when he's not right there!

 

People must think I'm a bit funny in the head... first I go on "un-dates" and then I have a "semi-boyfriend."

 

I was so happy to see my girlfriends. One of them has a serious relationship now, so I don't get to talk to her too often. Her sweetie is a really wonderful man and I am so very happy for both of them! It's nice to see one of my friends so happy, it gives me a lot of hope that I will be able to get through the tough times I have been going though.

 

Friends are the greatest things in the whole world. Hugs, support, a sympathetic ear when times are tough... how can anything be better? People, cherish every moment you spend with your friends!

[Escobar 0]

Since I got maried 15 months ago, and got a daughter 6 months ago, I don't have so much contact with my friends as much as I used to. But I think you're right, a good friendship is worth a lot. I'll have to be carefull not to loose my best friends, because I don't see them very often...

[Kyra_Ashleigh 0]

I've been neglecting my log again. Things are just never normal for me anymore!

 

My grandfather hired some nurses to help out around here, so that's a very good thing. I have been so overloaded trying to take care of him and deal with all that's going on in my life as well.

 

I felt really guilty at first because I was supposed to be the one doing everything for him and I was failing miserably. But one of the nurses talked to me and told me that at my age, I deserved a life outside of caring for an elderly family member. It was really helpful to hear that from someone, especially since my grandfather can be a real tough person to get along with. He is very demanding on family and had gotten into the habit of addressing me as, "(curse word), go to the store!"

 

I haven't had an "un-date" in a few weeks. My friend has been very overworked lately. When you leave for work at 5:30am and get home at 8pm, you have little time for a social life. I was hurt a bit because he hasn't been calling, but we talked yesterday and I understand that it wasn't because of anything I did. I'm just hoping his bosses get their (curse word) together soon so he can go back to working normal hours. Poor guy.

 

I went to a concert Friday night. I had to go alone because all of my friends had other things going on and the bar basically sucked, but it was good to get out for a while. I saw Second Coming, who are a favorite band of mine since high school. I can't say enough good things about them, they are awesome if you like hard rock.

 

I finally decided to change my signature for the boards. My 88 car isn't doing all that great, and to be honest, I'm a little peeved with Jarrett's sponsor right now for screwing up my work and my social life.

[Kyra_Ashleigh 0]

I got to spend some time with my sweetie finally! B) B)

 

He's been having a lot of trouble with his ex-girlfriend lately. She's been threatening to come over and sit in front of his place in her car to see what he's doing and if he's seeing anyone now.

 

He's all freaked out. I don't blame him, I've had trouble with exes before too. I was almost hoping this woman would show up so I could beat the snot out of her for upsetting my friend so much!

 

My work's still treating me badly. I finally got signed up to take the postal service exams, so I may end up changing jobs eventually. I'm waiting to hear from them about when the exams are so I can take time off of work. B)

[Kyra_Ashleigh 0]

I have been pretty busy lately. I'm working on final papers for my divorce right now.

 

I've also been spending my free time with my guy friend and going to concerts. I saw a band called Peace And Silence on Saturday and they are awesome.

 

I might go to see a show with my guy friend Friday... it all depends on which concert I decide to go to. There's this one singer I like who's playing in Seattle, but the band my guy friend wants to see is playing down south somewhere. Tough decision for sure!

 

He just called me to say his computer crashed. I encouraged him to use the "computer repair kit" I gave him months ago when his email was acting up.

 

It looks like my grandpa will have to go into an assisted living place. He's not doing too well, even with the nurses and has been back in the hospital again.

 

I'm worried a bit about my security living here, considering my grandpa owns the place and he's not able to care for himself any more. I'm thinking my uncle might decide to kick me out if my grandpa moves into a "home."

 

Well, time for bed... three more long days to go before my one-day weekend!

[Lursa 0]

I will pray that everything will work for you.

[Kyra_Ashleigh 0]

Thanks Lursa! Sometimes you just need to keep your head up and take life as it comes!

 

My work has me too tired right now. Today I packed 97 pieces of antique glassware, a bed frame and a toilet! I was already tired by the time the store owner had us lug 40 boxes of books from one end of the store to the other without a logical reason. And I was exhausted to the point of nearly falling down when I decided to be nice and help the UPS driver load his truck!

 

I'm really looking forward to the weekend. My guy friend has suggested we go to a club near where he lives and see a band he likes. I'm going to miss another good concert to go with him, but I think I'd rather see a band I've never seen before with my sweetie than go to a different club alone.

 

I'm also looking forward to getting off work early tomarrow and taking a nice ride on my new mountain bike. I want to go hit some trails near my workplace! B)

 

I'm pretty happy with my life right now, aside from the fact that I'm dead tired. I'm almost done with fine-tuning my divorce papers. It's a big weight off my shoulders to have this almost done after so long!

[Kyra_Ashleigh 0]

Good news! Looks like we hve reached a final agreement on the divorce! Now I just need to contact the future ex to let him know things are cool, call my lawyer to arrange an appointment and get the darn things signed!

 

It's nice to have this worked out finally.

 

I may have a date tonight, but I'm not banking on it. I saw my friend at work today and he's over-scheduled again, so he might not get off until late, which might screw up our plans. It's okay, I have an alternate event that I will attend with some of my friends if he can't get together. B)

 

Since I'm off work early, I'm doing some laundry and stuff so I have clothes to wear tonight. I'm planning on taking my bike for a ride in a little while if it doesn't start raining! B)

 

I'm going to see Second Coming tomarrow night, so that will be fun. I'm hoping that my weekend will go as planned, but things around here are never predictable!

 

Sunday's Mother's Day, so I have to go to my mom's gravesite and take some flowers. I always miss my mom badly this time of year, especially since Mother's Day and my Birthday are so close together. B)

[Kyra_Ashleigh 0]

I took a nice, unplanned road trip this afternoon after work. I really needed to get out and think and drive a bit. I ended up on the Kitsap Peninsula before I turned around and came home. Traffic stunk just about everywhere I went, road construction and accidents galore! B)

 

I'm glad to be home for a while. I'm going to see Second Coming this evening. I think it will be very theraputical for me to go to an angry rock concert. I had a bit of a negative evening yesterday and I need to work out my frustrations in a constructive manner.

 

That good "friend" of mine.... well, he got back together with his ex. And here he was inviting me out to a concert when he has a "girlfriend". Oooh, I am soooo very angry. B)

 

To top that off, a mutual friend of ours told me today that he and my former "friend" are planning to go to a concert I had planned to attend on my Birthday weekend! So I'm either going to skip the show or make sure I'm surrounded by my girlfriends all night.

 

I'll get through it. I always do, but darn, I'm livid about this whole situation.

 

It wouldn't be so much of a problem, being that this guy was just a good friend of mine and not really a "boyfriend," but it sucks to have to lose a good friend because he's gotten back together with his psycho, paranoid ex. The last thing I said to him was, "I care about you and don't want you to get hurt again. Watch your back, because people who disrespect you and invade your privacy rarely learn from their mistakes. And if this girl hurts you again, I'm going to find her and kick her a$$!" My "friend" really deserves better.

[Kor37 9]

I didn't want to say anything because its none of my business but I kind of saw this coming. It seems like you were always the one that had to initiate contact. You clean his house (I've NEVER had a girlfriend do that....Damn!) You make plans and he finds some way to break them using work as an excuse much of the time. You were definitely the pursuer not the other way around like it ought to be.

Please don't dwell on this Kyra. You'll find someone else out there that will give you the respect that you deserve.

[Kyra_Ashleigh 0]

It's been a busy few weeks here!

 

My divorce was finalized last Friday (my birthday). I'm happy to have the stress of that off my shoulders now.

 

I spent Friday evening with my friend "L". I know I should probably give him a nice, swift kick in the backside instead of continuing to be friends with him, but the reality check worked wonders on me and it seems I can manage to be friends with him without getting my feelings hurt, so that's good.

 

I spent Saturday night and all of Sunday with my favorite cousin who's like a big sister to me. She works a lot, so even though she's only an hour away, we only see each other once every few months. She and her roommate took me out for breakfast and coffee and then we played poker at her house all day long. :(

 

My friend "M" is mad at me because I was supposed to go to a concert he was going to on Saturday. Well, he told me he wasn't going to go if it rained and it was raining. Looks like he went anyway and nobody he knew was there! I told him he should have called my cell phone since I was right on the other side of the freeway and would have come down, but he didn't have my number because "L" backed out on him too and "L" is the one who always calls me. So he pouted a bit on Monday, but it seems all cool now. I probably shouldn't be out drinking with "M" anyway since he just got married, but he's a friend of one of my cousins, so it's apparently okay for him to hang around with me! B)

 

People at my work have started to look at me funny since it's become quite obvious that I'm socializing with "L" and "M" and their inner circle outside of work. These guys come into my work for various reasons daily, so that's how I know them... but I don't think it's a stretch for me to hang around with guys who are friends with my cousin Frank. Plus, "L" let it slip the other day that I occasionally have a beer with the guys at the "UPS Deli."

 

Basically, it's the place where all the UPS drvers go after work to watch sports until the traffic dies down. The darn place is on my way home and I ended up having a beer with the guys one night by chance and now I go about once a week. I think I've met about 25 UPS Drivers from our local area and not one of them is single. Maybe I need to re-think my motivations here! B)

 

I'm taking my daughter to central Washington for the weekend. It's going to be a nice break... I had to beg one of my coworkers to switch shifts for me so I could go on this trip, but I was a bit sad that all my friends were going camping to different places and I didn't want to stay home. I might get online from the vacation house, but I'm not positive on that yet... my laptop gets on my nerves at times.

 

So, I'm officially single again, I've decided I'm not going to try dating again until my life settles down a bit, I'm hoping to relocate in the next six months and I'm looking for a new job near where I plan to move to. Yeah, I'm just a little bit busy!