Angel of Darkness 0 Posted October 11, 2004 I know this is personal but it's something that can happen every day to some people. Have you ever self harmed or do you know someone who does/has self harmed? What are your views on this? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BlueCrystal 0 Posted October 11, 2004 (edited) I've never done it but I have met people in group Therapy that have. Many people don't understand what they do. I was uncomfortable with the *cutters* and quit the group. They don't cutter themselves to create pain but to release pain. They said that the bleeding made them feel better and my crying made me feel better at times. Some of them would have themselves tattooed and some would do burning/branding of themselves. Edited October 11, 2004 by BlueCrystal Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Angel of Darkness 0 Posted October 11, 2004 No one take a different impression on me please or make me feel bad as this is taking a lot for me to admit this. (And this is only what I think and I'm not sure if it counts) It's something I don't mean to do but I can't help it. I don't know that I'm doing it but I do. I don't cut myself witha knige or a razor or anything but, it just happens. (Yes I feel really small and bad for this so please don't make me feel worse...) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Gotabite 0 Posted October 11, 2004 No, I don't think it's something that anyone should try to make you feel bad about....because this doesn't mean that you are a bad person.......Still, obviously it bothers you that you do this....it also seems to bother you that it just happens, and you seem not to be able to control it. You've decided to ask your friends hear for their opinions.........So, here is my opinion........I truly believe it would be wise to talk to a professional...................I'm not trying to put any kind of label on you. From reading this post, it seems that this is a behavior that you want to stop....and you aren't sure how to do it. I think the best way to do it is to get some help from a professional whose expertise is in this area. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
sea trooper 0 Posted October 11, 2004 I don't exercise. I never find the time or patience for it, and I know it might get to me in the future... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Jeanway 0 Posted October 11, 2004 Yes and yes to your questions. It's nasty business. Some professionals think it's self-loathing. You think you need to be punished for something. Like being a bad person, or guilty about something. I found in my case, it was a constant barrage of personal insults and put-downs from someone I couldn't get away from. I believed for a long time I had no right to be alive and that I was a mistake. It took me a long time to stop feeling this way. having said that now I guess some of you will understand why I don't take critisizm too well. I had my fill of it when I was growing up. When I met a few other people, kids my own age, who did the same things I did. I looked at it in a different light. Then I realized how terrible it was. The things I inflicted upon myself I wouldn't do to my worst enemy. And that's when I started to get better and stop it. Plus I prayed about it alot. When I realized that God doesn't want us to suffer by mutilating our bodies that also made a big impact on this problem, for me anyway. If it's you, you need to stop it. :angry: Nobody deserves this, NOBODY. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Theunicornhunter 2 Posted October 11, 2004 Angel, this is a very personal topic. I hope you will be able to do as Gotabite suggests and find a professional to talk to - someone you can trust. As other posts have indicated - people harm themselves for different reasons and I believe a professional could help you identify why it happens which will help you change your behavior (as you've indicated you want to do.) I think Sea Trooper was trying to make the point that some of us harm ourselves in different ways - while some issues like cutting get a lot of attention - people still harm themselves in ways that - ironic as it may seem - are socially acceptable. I grew up in a dsyfunctional family and I felt a lot of self directed rage when I was young - though I didn't participate in cutting or related activities like the teens of today. I wish no child or young person ever had to experience what I felt as a child but, sadly, I know they do and will. Good luck. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Jeanway 0 Posted October 11, 2004 Yes, U.H. and GAB, I agree with both of you. Angel, try to find someone you can talk with in person. Even though this is very personal there is just so much you can do on a web-site. But maybe bringing this up to people in here who care what happens to you might give you enough encouragment to find some help in your real world. I don't work in the Mental Health field so I can't help you that way. But Gotabite does, I believe. Maybe you and she could PM each other??? And if you need someone to talk to you can always PM me anytime. O.K.? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Valeris 2 Posted October 12, 2004 You are not alone, Angel. I cut myself too. I still do. You can always PM me. If you are not lying about your birthdate, you are only a little over a month older than me. I do not know as much about you, but I do it because I need to feel something. At moments, I am in complete emotional turmoil and at others I am completely numb. I need to feel something I know is real, something I can identify. Pain seems to be the only way out. I know it is bad too. Mom is trying to find a counselor for me, but it is hard because I moved here less than two months ago and she does not know who would be good or bad. I do not think any different of you, but then that would be beyond hypocritical, as I do the same thing. Thank you for sharing, as it finally made me brave enough to admit to it on this board too. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
hangon 3 Posted October 12, 2004 No one take a different impression on me please or make me feel bad as this is taking a lot for me to admit this. (And this is only what I think and I'm not sure if it counts) It's something I don't mean to do but I can't help it. I don't know that I'm doing it but I do. I don't cut myself witha knige or a razor or anything but, it just happens. (Yes I feel really small and bad for this so please don't make me feel worse...) 271582[/snapback] *MASSIVE HUGS*...hey it wont change my opinion of you kerry,i had a girlfriend that cut her self and it killed me having to go threw seeing her do that to herself,some ppl think its the only way to release the pain they are going threw and some ppl think its attention seeking i dont know what to think about it cuz i have never wanted to cut myself. P.s you need me kerry anytime you can always talk to me :) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Angela 1 Posted October 12, 2004 When I was in high school I self harmed, I would just cut my hands and scratch over and over again. It was almost like hypnosis during it, and then I would try to hide it. I felt bad and disrespectful and like i was hurting my parents, I was ashamed of myself. I still am, though I don't harm now. The last time I deliberatelky took something sharp to my self was the day my ex broke up with me. I hurt so direly I wanted to hurt physically, cause then I would have a reason to hurt. Prior to that I hadn't harmed in 8 years. I won't do it again. I refuse to take myself back to it. My sympathies AOD, trust me no one thinks bad of you, we just know you are going through a rough time of things. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kyra_Ashleigh 0 Posted October 12, 2004 AOD :) During the two worst depressions of my teen years, I resorted to burning myself. My tools of choice were hot candle wax or a knife heated over a flame. I still have some light scarring ten years later... now I just tell people they are from grease burns at the restaurant I used to manage. I was lucky that I had one really wonderful friend who guided my through my worst times. Please seek help from a counselor if you can. I went as far as to ask my family to put me in therapy, but we couldn't afford it. I got through my problems, but it would have been so much easier if I had been able to get the counseling I needed. Feel free to leave me a PM anytime. I am a very open person and will happily discuss my past with another who needs support! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Angel of Darkness 0 Posted October 12, 2004 *sobs with happiness* aww thank you all massive last night I cried after I posted this cause it was the first time I'd really admitted it to myself. While other people may not call it self harming I do because I make myself bleed. Not on perpose and I don't actually know what I'm doing. I don't cut myself with a blade either. If anyone wants to know a full story you can PM me. And also thanks for your stories and insights too I am going through a rough time and this has started when my confidence dropped and has made it drop more. In times like this and any other times you need your friends around you. :) to all friends. Also I got my mom to take a picture of it (Because she knows I do it, so does my nana) and they have seen it. It's gone about for about 3 years but only now gotten worse where I've done it everyday. I got her to take the picture so I can see how bad it is for myself. I may even have it as my computer desktop so I can see what I'm doing myself. I came up with an idea yesterday, one I'd thought about before but not sure if it would work. I tried it out yesterday and so far it seems to work. I'll keep doing the idea and hopefully will stop this, and re-build my confidence. Again, thank you all :) NC/AoD ~Kerry~ Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Angel of Darkness 0 Posted October 12, 2004 (edited) scratch that about me being an accidental self harmer. I'm now doing it purposely. To relieve the pain. Still without a blade but something equally dangerous. My own fingernails. Long/short they are still lethal. I just scratched at m arm continuously until it bled. It didn't so I tried somewhere else which did, just a little bit. Just that small site of blood made me stop. I wouldn't stop until I'd seen it. And now it completely stings. I'm not putting cold water on it as that will sting and also I want to bear through the pain. Why am I doing this to myself? If anyone has any advice you want to give me please do. In a PM, here on MSN, Yahoo or AIM messengers feel free. It will be appreciated EDIT: Thanks to Hangs advice I put some anteseptic cream on :) its feeling better :) Edited October 12, 2004 by Angel of Darkness Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
LoveMalePecs1 0 Posted October 12, 2004 Well i've heard of people that do that so all i can do is just hope u get better and stop cutting urself Angel ("God be with You") :) :) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Valeris 2 Posted October 12, 2004 scratch that about me being an accidental self harmer. I'm now doing it purposely. To relieve the pain. Still without a blade but something equally dangerous. My own fingernails. Long/short they are still lethal. I just scratched at m arm continuously until it bled. It didn't so I tried somewhere else which did, just a little bit. Just that small site of blood made me stop. I wouldn't stop until I'd seen it. Trust me, fingernails hurt more than a blade because they are more blunt. They really do not work that well; I tried them first too. If you have to, it (in my opinion) really is better to just use a blade. (Speaking from experience, again). And putting water on it is good, despite the fact that it will sting. It will reduce the risk of infection. A cut is not near as bad as an infected cut. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Gotabite 0 Posted October 13, 2004 (edited) As I said in an earlier post, you've come to your friends for suggestions/advice.....And most of the friends here who have had similar experiences have suggested to you that it will take a professional to help you figure this out and get beyond it.............Over 15 years ago, I gave up my professional practice to enter the educational field. But I teach mental health professionals. So I stay abreast of what is currently thought regarding emotional issues. When I was practicing, and even today, self injuring is considered a symptom of something much deeper.......more often than not, it is a behavior that will take more than you, your mother, or your friends to help you stop....It can also lead to more serious injuries if it continues.......Again with all my heart, I urge you to seek professional help. Edited October 13, 2004 by Gotabite Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Angel of Darkness 0 Posted October 13, 2004 scratch that about me being an accidental self harmer. I'm now doing it purposely. To relieve the pain. Still without a blade but something equally dangerous. My own fingernails. Long/short they are still lethal. I just scratched at m arm continuously until it bled. It didn't so I tried somewhere else which did, just a little bit. Just that small site of blood made me stop. I wouldn't stop until I'd seen it. Trust me, fingernails hurt more than a blade because they are more blunt. They really do not work that well; I tried them first too. If you have to, it (in my opinion) really is better to just use a blade. (Speaking from experience, again). And putting water on it is good, despite the fact that it will sting. It will reduce the risk of infection. A cut is not near as bad as an infected cut. 272087[/snapback] My nails worked :( But Hangon suggested antespetic cream which I'm using... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
