A l t e r E g o 9 Posted October 8, 2003 > 1. Compaq is considering changing the command "Press > Any Key" to "Press Return Key" because of the flood > of calls asking where the "Any" key is. > > 2. AST technical support had a caller complaining > that her mouse was hard to control with the dust > cover on. The cover turned out to be the plastic bag > the mouse was packaged in. > > 3. Another Dell customer called to say he couldn't > get his computer to fax anything. After 40 minutes > of troubleshooting, the technician discovered the > man was trying to fax a piece of paper by holding it > in front of the monitor screen and hitting the "Send" key. > > 4. Yet another, Dell customer called to complain > that his keyboard no longer worked. He had cleaned > it by filling up his tub with soap and water and > soaking the keyboard for a day, then removing all > the keys and washing them individually. > > 5.. A Dell technician received a call from a customer > who was enraged because his computer had told him he > was "Bad and an invalid.." The tech explained that > the computer's "bad command" and "invalid" responses > shouldn't be taken personally. > > 6. A confused caller to IBM was having trouble > printing documents. He told the technician that the > computer had said it couldn't find the printer. The > user had also tried turning the computer screen to > face the printer, but that his computer still > couldn't "see" the printer. > > 7. An exasperated caller to Dell Computer Tech > Support couldn't get her new Dell Computer to turn > on. After ensuring the computer was plugged in, the > technician asked her what happened when she pushed > the power button. Her response, "I pushed and pushed > on this foot pedal and nothing happens." The "foot > pedal" turned out to be the computer's mouse. > > 8. Another customer called Compaq tech support to > say her brand new computer wouldn't work. She said > she unpacked the unit, plugged it in and sat there > for 20 minutes waiting for something to happen. When > asked what happened when she pressed the power > button, she asked, "What power button?" > > 9. Another IBM customer had trouble installing > software and rang for support. "I put in the first > disk, and that was OK. It said to put in the second > disk, and had some problems with the disk. When it > said to put in the third disk, I couldn't even fit > it in.." The user hadn't realized that "Insert Disk > 2" implied to remove Disk 1 first. > > 10. A story from a Novel NetWire SysOp: > CALLER: "Hello, is this Tech Support?" > TECH: "Yes, it is. How may I help you?" > CALLER: "The cup holder on my PC is broken and I am > within my warranty period. How do I go about getting > that fixed?" > TECH: "I'm sorry, but did you say a cup holder?" > CALLER: "Yes, it's attached to the front of my computer." > TECH: "Please excuse me. If I seem a bit stumped, > it's because I am. Did you receive this as part of a > promotional at a trade show? How did you get this > cup holder? Does it have any trademark on it?" > CALLER: "It came with my computer. I don't know > anything about a promotional. It just has 4X on it." > > At this point, the Tech Rep had to mute the caller > because he couldn't stand it. He was laughing too > hard. The caller had been using the load drawer of > the CD-ROM drive as a cup holder and snapped it off > the drive. > > 11. A woman called the Canon help desk with a > problem with her printer. The tech asked her if she > was "running it under windows." The woman responded, > "No, my desk is next to the door. But that is a good > point. The girl sitting in the cubicle next to me is > under a window and her printer is working fine." > > 12. And last but not least: > TECH SUPPORT: "Okay Bob, let's press the control and > escape keys at the same time. That brings up a task > list in the middle of the screen. Now type the > letter "P" to bring up the Program Manager.." > CUSTOMER: "I don't have a P." > TECH SUPPORT: "On your keyboard, Bob." > CUSTOMER: "What do you mean?" > TECH SUPPORT: "P, on your keyboard, Bob." > CUSTOMER: "I'm not going to do that --------------------------------------------------------- Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Luvin1stdegree 0 Posted October 8, 2003 This was a riot! Thanks for sharing. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
trekzone 0 Posted October 8, 2003 - well done Alterego Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lessa_Soong 0 Posted October 8, 2003 Its a wonder these people can find the door and leave their houses in the morning, isn't it? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Goose 0 Posted October 9, 2003 Stardate:213770.9 Wow some people can be truly stupid Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
LordOfTheBorg 1 Posted August 7, 2005 *falls off chair from laughing* :lol: OMG, PEOPLE ARE SO STUPID ABOUT COMPUTERS! "P, on your keyboard bob... I'm not gonna do that!" :lol: :huh: Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BakulaBabe 2 Posted August 7, 2005 I don't know much about computers, but even I'm not that stupid! Sheesh, didn't those knuckleheads read the instructions? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Tal 0 Posted August 7, 2005 Theres Instructions with compuers? *Looks with all his computer stuff and pull some out* Oh yeah. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites