Luvin1stdegree 0 Posted July 14, 2003 INFORMATION YOU MAY NEED TO HELP YOU CHOOSE YOUR NEXT HEALTH PLAN. Q. What does HMO stand for? A. This is actually a variation of the phrase, "HEY MOE." Its roots go back to a concept pioneered by Moe of the Three Stooges, who discovered that a patient could be made to forget about the pain in his foot if he was poked hard enough in the eyes. Q. I just joined an HMO. How difficult will it be to choose the doctor I want? A. Just slightly more difficult than choosing your parents. Your insurer will provide you with a book listing all the doctors in the plan. These doctors basically fall into two categories -- those who are no longer accepting new patients, and those who will see you but are no longer participating in the plan. But don't worry; the remaining doctor who is still in the plan and accepting new patients has an office just a half-day's drive away, and a diploma from a Third World country. Q. Do all diagnostic procedures require pre-certification? A. No. Only those you need. Q. Can I get coverage for my preexisting conditions? A. Certainly, as long as they don't require any treatment. Q. What happens if I want to try alternative forms of medicine? A. You'll need to find alternative forms of payment. Q. My pharmacy plan only covers generic drugs, but I need the name brand. I tried the Generic Medication, but it gave me a stomach ache. What should I do? A. Poke yourself in the eye. Q. What if I'm away from home and I get sick? A. You really shouldn't do that. Q. I think I need to see a specialist, but my doctor insists he can handle my problem. Can a general practitioner really perform a heart transplant right in his office? A. Hard to say, but considering that all you're risking is the $20 co-payment, there's no harm in giving him a shot at it. Q. Will health care be different in the next century? A. No. But if you call right now, you might get an appointment by then. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lessa_Soong 0 Posted July 14, 2003 ROFLMAO!!!! OMG those were GREAT! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Yillara Skye 1 Posted July 14, 2003 ROFL!!!! Aint that the truth! Yillara's view of Doctors---> Her new view of doctors after her injury---> :( !!!! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TrekkieMage 0 Posted July 14, 2003 LMAO! That be the truth...You should have seen us trying to get a physical for me! Our one doctor who we found and were comforable with, got booted out of her office and is starting up again. She's got everything she needs at the moment, except insurance. Gack. And she had all my papers :( Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
A l t e r E g o 9 Posted July 14, 2003 ROFL!!!! Aint that the truth! :( You mean it IS a joke? I thought she was sharing her experiences. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TrekkieMage 0 Posted July 14, 2003 ROFL!!!! Aint that the truth! :( You mean it IS a joke? I thought she was sharing her experiences. LOL!! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Yillara Skye 1 Posted July 14, 2003 ROFL!!!! Aint that the truth! :( You mean it IS a joke? I thought she was sharing her experiences. you know, there is a fine line in this situation... it could be serious, could be a joke... arggggghhh! Doctors! *runs around screaming!* Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
dsbs 0 Posted July 24, 2003 I loved these 3: Q. My pharmacy plan only covers generic drugs, but I need the name brand. I tried the Generic Medication, but it gave me a stomach ache. What should I do? A. Poke yourself in the eye. Q. What if I'm away from home and I get sick? A. You really shouldn't do that. Q. Will health care be different in the next century? A. No. But if you call right now, you might get an appointment by then. ROFL!! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
