cptwright 1 Posted February 25, 2005 this has got some good humor too, remind me not to get on her bad side. :P This was just way too funny not to pass on---- > > > > Hell hath no fury, like a woman scorned..... > > > > "The Curtain Rods" > > She spent the first day packing her belongings into boxes, crates and suitcases. > > On the second day, she had the movers come and collect her things. > > On the third day, she sat down for the last time at their beautiful dining room table by candlelight, put on some soft background music, and feasted on a pound of shrimp, a jar of caviar, and a bottle of Chardonnay. > > When she had finished, she went into each and every room and deposited a few half-eaten shrimp shells, dipped in caviar, into the hollow of the curtain rods. > > She then cleaned up the kitchen and left. > > When the husband returned with his new girlfriend, all was bliss for the first few days. Then slowly, the house began to smell. They tried everything; cleaning and mopping and airing the place out. Vents were checked for dead rodents, and carpets were steam cleaned. Air fresheners were hung everywhere. > > Exterminators were brought in to set off gas canisters, during which they had to move out for a few days, and in the end they even paid to replace the expensive wool carpeting. > > Nothing worked. People stopped coming over to visit...Repairmen refused to work in the house...The maid quit...Finally, they could not take the stench any longer and decided to move. > > A month later, even though they had cut their price in half, they could not find a buyer for their stinky house. Word got out, and eventually, even the local realtors refused to return their calls. Finally, they had to borrow a huge sum of money from the bank to purchase a new place. The ex-wife called the man, and asked how things were going. He told her the saga of the rotting house. She listened politely, and said that she missed her old home terribly, and would be willing to reduce her divorce settlement in exchange for getting the house back... > > Knowing his ex-wife had no idea how bad the smell was, he agreed on price that was about 1/10th of what the house had been worth...But only if she were to sign the papers that very day. She agreed, and within the hour, his lawyers delivered the paperwork. > > A week later, the man and his new girlfriend stood smirking as they watched the moving company pack everything to take to their new home... > > ...including the curtain rods. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Jaz4stfguy 0 Posted February 25, 2005 :P LMAO! B) That is a gem, cptwright! B) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Spockstellaiter 0 Posted February 25, 2005 :P that is funny!! B) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Angela 1 Posted February 25, 2005 genius, her vengenance follows, She musta had THE biggest grin ever. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Theunicornhunter 2 Posted February 25, 2005 That is a good one. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
cassidy 0 Posted February 26, 2005 :biggrin: OMG! that's funny as! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Yillara Skye 1 Posted February 26, 2005 oh YES! Brilliantly wicked! I loved that!!! :lol: :biggrin: Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
KIMIMELA 1 Posted February 26, 2005 :lol: :P :biggrin: i don't understand it Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Madame Butterfly 0 Posted February 26, 2005 this has got some good humor too, remind me not to get on her bad side. :lol: This was just way too funny not to pass on---- > > > > Hell hath no fury, like a woman scorned..... > > > > "The Curtain Rods" > > She spent the first day packing her belongings into boxes, crates and suitcases. > > On the second day, she had the movers come and collect her things. > > On the third day, she sat down for the last time at their beautiful dining room table by candlelight, put on some soft background music, and feasted on a pound of shrimp, a jar of caviar, and a bottle of Chardonnay. > > When she had finished, she went into each and every room and deposited a few half-eaten shrimp shells, dipped in caviar, into the hollow of the curtain rods. > > She then cleaned up the kitchen and left. > > When the husband returned with his new girlfriend, all was bliss for the first few days. Then slowly, the house began to smell. They tried everything; cleaning and mopping and airing the place out. Vents were checked for dead rodents, and carpets were steam cleaned. Air fresheners were hung everywhere. > > Exterminators were brought in to set off gas canisters, during which they had to move out for a few days, and in the end they even paid to replace the expensive wool carpeting. > > Nothing worked. People stopped coming over to visit...Repairmen refused to work in the house...The maid quit...Finally, they could not take the stench any longer and decided to move. > > A month later, even though they had cut their price in half, they could not find a buyer for their stinky house. Word got out, and eventually, even the local realtors refused to return their calls. Finally, they had to borrow a huge sum of money from the bank to purchase a new place. The ex-wife called the man, and asked how things were going. He told her the saga of the rotting house. She listened politely, and said that she missed her old home terribly, and would be willing to reduce her divorce settlement in exchange for getting the house back... > > Knowing his ex-wife had no idea how bad the smell was, he agreed on price that was about 1/10th of what the house had been worth...But only if she were to sign the papers that very day. She agreed, and within the hour, his lawyers delivered the paperwork. > > A week later, the man and his new girlfriend stood smirking as they watched the moving company pack everything to take to their new home... > > ...including the curtain rods. 305893[/snapback] :P :biggrin: I did that in someones hubcaps. Even the coyotes were licking them, but it took forever for her to figure it. :lol: Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Valeris 2 Posted March 20, 2005 :angry: This is too funny!! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites