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Dabo Queen

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Lieutenant Nicoletti's Personal Log- Star Date 50537.5

 

Boring day. Torres assigned us to clean out plasma manifolds AGAIN. I'm so sick of looking at plasma manifolds, I could scream. As usual, she paired me with Vorik. At least she paired me with someone who knows what he's doing, and someone Star Fleet...those damn Maquis always give attitude when they're told to do an assignment they think is 'beneath' them. Torres always keeps them in line, but I still feel more comfortable when I'm not worried about taking phaser fire in the back.

 

Vorik seems back to normal after his Pon Farr incident. It must be embarrassing for him; having everybody from Captain Janeway to the other ensigns know something so private about him. What still absolutely floors me is that B'Elanna would say no to him, but yes to that womanizing jerk Tom Paris. It takes all kinds, I guess.

 

I think about the men I dated back on earth, about David, specifically. He never remembered my birthday, was always late for our dates, too busy with his astrometrics work to bother with having a serious relationship. Vorik can remember tiny details about B'Elanna's conversations; things she likes, things that make her happy. Paris is just like David, only worried about what he wants, what he likes.

 

Personal Quote For The Day: "A total abstainer is one who abstains from everything but abstention, and especially from inactivity in the affairs of others." - Ambrose Bierce

 

 

Ensign Vorik's Personal Log- Star Date 50537.5

 

Lieutenant Torres assigned me to plasma manifolds again today. While I understand clearly that this is part of my duties, I cannot help but wonder about her intentions. Does she still feel apprehensive towards me because of my conduct during Pon Farr? Would my skills not be better applied in some more important task? While it is not for me to question her openly, this is a curious example of emotion affecting judgment.

 

Lieutenant Nicoletti was also assigned to plasma manifolds today. She seems to treat me differently since my Pon Farr, which is not surprising...most of the crew has treated me differently since that time. However, while most of the crew regards me with caution, Lieutenant Nicoletti seems to exhibit what humans call sympathy. It is very curious that she would react this way in the face of my violent, emotionally charged outburst.

 

Daily Meditation Tenant: "All are lunatics, but he who can analyze his delusions is called a philosopher." - 19th Century Earth author Ambrose Bierce

 

 

 

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Coming Soon: Nicoletti takes a chance; Vorik is clueless to the Lieutenant's intentions!

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Nicoletti stood at a side control panel in engineering, performing a routine diagnostic. She kept shooting glances at Vorik, but would look away when his eyes met her own. Why am I looking away...he's going to think I'm nuts! Nicoletti thought to herself. Vorik walked near her, and she held her breath ever-so-slightly.

 

It's been so long, so very long...why not just see if he would consider it? her brain whispered. She had a flash of David, an insincere smile, a hushed conversation. "Sue, you know I'd love to go to dinner tonight, but I just can't make it. I've got a lot of important work to finish." she heard as clearly as if it had just been uttered.

 

She shook herself, and looked away from the warp core, only to come face-to-face with Vorik. She dropped her tricorder, obviously startled. Vorik bent to retrieve it.

 

"You don't have to do that." Nicoletti said, clearly uncomfortable. Vorik looked up at her, arching an eyebrow. "Lieutenant...I am receiving the impression that you are uncomfortable around me...does your discomfort stem from my incident with the Pon Farr?" he asked. "Of course not." she replied defensively. "Then, may I ask, why are you clearly experiencing what humans call 'nervousness'?" he asked.

 

Nicoletti took a deep breath, straightened her back, the model of professionalism. "I'm just having a bad day, Ensign. Nothing to do with you." she said, taking her tricorder from his hands, and starting to walk away. Vorik continued to walk beside her. "I have read about several suggestions for remedies of a 'bad day'. Sports, leisure time, various holodeck programs...human women often enjoy chocolate and an interesting concept called a 'bubble bath'." he explained.

 

Nicoletti turned and looked at Vorik's face: so young, so willing to help her. For the first time in what seemed like forever, she cracked a smile, her previous anxiety vanishing in an instant.

 

"Okay, if you're so eager to help...I want to learn to play Kal Toh...will you teach me?" she asked. She waited what seemed like an eternity for his answer, but it was actually only a few fractions of a second.

 

"Of course. Shall we play in the mess hall?" he asked. "The mess hall?" she asked questioningly. "You always take turbolift four to the mess hall at approximately eighteen forty hours after your duty shift in engineering. It is currently eighteen thirty five." Vorik informed her.

 

She smiled, pleasantly surprised with Vorik's revelation of her schedule. "I think Neelix is trying a Vulcan buffet tonight, come to think of it...you can help me choose what I'll eat." "Mr. Neelix's idea of Vulcan cuisine is a bit--overdeveloped--but I will select several food choices that are considered delicacies on Vulcan." Vorik told her.

 

They walked out of engineering together, barely noticing as Tom and B'Elanna walked by. Tom looked at B'Elanna, surprised. "You know, I think that's the first time I've ever seen Nicoletti smile?" Tom said.

 

"Yeah, and she's with Vorik." B'Elanna said, her expression hard to read.

 

 

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Coming Soon: A tough line of questioning from Janeway, and Nicoletti's past comes back to haunt her!

 

 

***

 

 

 

Posting two parts together...hope y'all enjoy! <3

 

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"I'm just worried about her is all." B'Elanna said to Captain Janeway as they stood across the mess hall, watching Nicoletti laugh at something Vorik said over the game of Kal Toh.

 

"I understand your hesitations B'Elanna...but I can't very well tell Sue she can't have feelings for Vorik just because you don't like him." Janeway told her. "I think I have a pretty good reason to not like him!" B'Elanna said, half-indignant.

 

"I'll talk to them." Janeway said, still watching Nicoletti's smile as Vorik leaned close, showing her where she should place her piece.

 

 

***

 

"Susan...do you have a minute?" Janeway said as she came up behind her in engineering. Nicoletti was working in a rather dark alcove of the engineering room, and she jumped slightly.

 

"Of course, Captain." Nicoletti replied. She was rather surprised; she admired the captain greatly, but never really engaged in a private heart-to-heart chat with her as so many of the crew had.

 

"I wanted to talk to you about your relationship with Ensign Vorik." Janeway said. "Vorik!?!" Nicoletti said, nearly dropping her tricorder. "Yes...it seems that you two are growing close to each other, bonding. In a way, you've been even more reserved with your feelings than Vorik when it comes to dealing with your fellow crew members. I was wondering why, after all this time of hiding yourself, you are opening up to Vorik, especially so soon after his incident with the Pon Farr." Janeway said.

 

Nicoletti squirmed under the captain's gaze, visibly uncomfortable. "We have common interests, that's all." she replied, avoiding Janeway's eyes. "But finding them so soon after such a violent outburst from Vorik? Susan, you have to understand why those kind of circumstances would worry me if you two are building a relationship together." Janeway said as gently as she could, putting a hand on Nicoletti's arm.

 

"Captain, Vorik and I have just become friends. That's all." Nicoletti said.

 

"Still, I'd like you to talk to the doctor...both of you. I'm not trying to make you uncomfortable, Sue...I just want to make sure that both of you are ready for this step that you're taking. Human-Vulcan relationships can be emotionally and mentally draining, even if you are just friends. Believe me, I know better than anyone." Janeway's smile didn't do anything to curb Susan's unease.

 

"Okay, Captain...I'll go." Nicoletti said, defeated.

 

 

***

 

"Describe the nature of your relationship with Ensign Vorik." the doctor said as he and Nicoletti sat alone in his office. "We're friends, that's all." Nicoletti replied. "What sparked your friendship?" the doctor continued.

 

"Well...I realized after his behavior during the Pon Farr that people were shying away from him. I felt for him; his life seemed very lonely." she explained. "But Vulcans don't express loneliness." the doctor said. "They may not express it, but they do feel it." Nicoletti said.

 

"Did you respond to Ensign Vorik's loneliness because you also feel alone?" the doctor asked gently. After a long, uncomfortable pause, Nicoletti said, "I didn't really feel lonely until I realized that I wasn't the only one."

 

The doctor handed Nicoletti a medical file...her own. "I've been reading over this, Lieutenant. I think we should talk about clearing some issues in your past if you are thinking about having a close, serious relationship with Ensign Vorik--friendship, or otherwise." he told her.

 

Nicoletti looked up at him with frightened eyes. "I don't see what this has to do with my service on Voyager. I worked very hard on Earth to overcome this so that I could continue my work with Star Fleet." Nicoletti said.

 

"Yes, and your progress in the face of such an incident has been remarkable. But friendships aren't the same thing as running engine diagnostics. They require a great deal of emotion, a great deal love. I think that we should talk our way through these unresolved issues."

 

"Doctor, I don't think I can do that." Nicoletti said.

 

"Lieutenant, everything will be fine. I'll be here to help you." the doctor said encouragingly. "Now let's start with your last major relationship, the one with Dr. David Leonard."

 

"David..." Nicoletti whispered. All the thoughts came back to her; all the feelings...the anger, the guilt, the pain, the overwhelming sorrow...

 

"NO! Doctor, I'm sorry, but I just can't do this." Nicoletti said, practically running from sickbay.

 

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Coming Soon: Nicoletti runs to Vorik for comfort; B'Elanna angrily confronts Vorik!

Edited by Dabo Queen

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