Yillara Skye 1 Posted July 24, 2003 ACTUAL STUDENT COMMENTS The following student comments were gleaned from essays, examinations and classroom discussions. These beguiling theories are in no way hypothetical. They are all real and attest to the high level of scientific literacy in our nation: 1 - In some rocks we find the fossil footprints of fishes. 2 - Many dead animals of the past changed to fossils while others preferred to be oil. 3 - All animals were here before mankind. The animals lived peacefully until mankind came along and made roads, houses, hotels and condoms. 4 - Sir Isaac Newton invented gravity. 5 - Involuntary muscles are not as willing as voluntary ones. 6 - Galileo showed that the earth was round and not vice versa. He dropped his balls to prove gravity. 7 - Mare Curie did her research at the Sore Buns Institute in France. 8 - Men are mammals and women are femammals. 9 - Proteins are composed of a mean old acid. 10 - The largest mammals are to be found in the sea because there is nowhere else to put them. 11 - Those who catch soars get leprosy. 12 - Methane, a greenhouse gas, comes from the burning of trees and cows. 13 - The spinal column is a long bunch of bones. The head sits on the top and you sit on the bottom. 14 - Water is melted steam. 15 - Mushrooms always grow in damp places and so they look like umbrellas. 16 - A monkey has a reprehensible tail. 17 - Some people say we condescended from the apes. 18 - The leopard has black spots that look like round soars on its body. 19 - A liter is a nest of young baby animals. 20 - Hot lather comes from volcanoes, when it cools it turns into rocks. 21 - Parallel lines never meet unless you bend one or both of them. 22 - The three cavities of the body are the head cavity, the tooth cavity and the abominable cavity. 23 - Most books say the sun is a star. But it still knows how to change back into the sun in the daytime. 24 - Cadavers are dead bodies that have donated themselves to science. This procedure is called gross anatomy. 25 - The cause of dew is through the earth revolving on its own axis and perspiring freely. 26 - Genetics explains why you look like your father and if you don‘t, why you should. 27 - A supersaturated solution is one that holds more than it can hold. 28 - The pistol of a flower is its only protection against insects. 29 - Respiration is composed of two acts, first inspiration, then expectoration. 30 - Algebra was the wife of Euclid. 31 - A circle is a figure with o corners and only one side. 32 - An example of animal breeding is the farmer who mated a bull that gave a great deal of milk with a bull with good meat. 33 - Water is composed of two gins, Oxygin and Hydrogin. Oxygin is pure gin. Hydrogin is gin and water. 34 - When oxygen is combined with anything, heat is given off. This is known as constipation. 35 - As the rain forests in the Amazon are shrinking, so are the Indians. 36 - You can listen to thunder after lightning and tell how close you came to getting hit. If you don‘t hear it, you got hit so never mind. 37 - The skeleton is what is left after the insides have been taken out and the outsides have been taken off. The purpose of the skeleton is something to hitch meat to. 38 - "Scientists are hypothetical people," wrote a student in chemistry. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lollypop 0 Posted July 24, 2003 I just love these. :( There's nothing funnier than people, or kids. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Goose 0 Posted July 24, 2003 Stardate:213559.9 36 - You can listen to thunder after lightning and tell how close you came to getting hit. If you don‘t hear it, you got hit so never mind. That kid deserves an A!! :( Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
dsbs 0 Posted July 24, 2003 lol geronimo These are really funny. I got them on a forward once Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Riaan 0 Posted July 28, 2003 6 - Galileo showed that the earth was round and not vice versa. He dropped his balls to prove gravity. 7 - Mare Curie did her research at the Sore Buns Institute in France. I did have to start drinking a glass of Coke before I read those! *Wipes Coke off monitor* Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
A l t e r E g o 9 Posted July 28, 2003 My top 5 favorites 5. 27 - A supersaturated solution is one that holds more than it can hold. 4. 9 - Proteins are composed of a mean old acid. 3. 31 - A circle is a figure with o corners and only one side.. 2. 15 - Mushrooms always grow in damp places and so they look like umbrellas. 1. 13 - The spinal column is a long bunch of bones. The head sits on the top and you sit on the bottom. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
removed 0 Posted July 28, 2003 22 - The three cavities of the body are the head cavity, the tooth cavity and the abominable cavity. 23 - Most books say the sun is a star. But it still knows how to change back into the sun in the daytime. 31 - A circle is a figure with o corners and only one side. 32 - An example of animal breeding is the farmer who mated a bull that gave a great deal of milk with a bull with good meat. 33 - Water is composed of two gins, Oxygin and Hydrogin. Oxygin is pure gin. Hydrogin is gin and water. wow. scary. lol. (and i see this happen alot in science classes. theres alot of pretty dumb people around. lol) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Yillara Skye 1 Posted July 29, 2003 22 - The three cavities of the body are the head cavity, the tooth cavity and the abominable cavity. 23 - Most books say the sun is a star. But it still knows how to change back into the sun in the daytime. 31 - A circle is a figure with o corners and only one side. 32 - An example of animal breeding is the farmer who mated a bull that gave a great deal of milk with a bull with good meat. 33 - Water is composed of two gins, Oxygin and Hydrogin. Oxygin is pure gin. Hydrogin is gin and water. wow. scary. lol. (and i see this happen alot in science classes. theres alot of pretty dumb people around. lol) know what is REALLY scary?? I saw/heard answers like this in COLLEGE classes, and these were various science majors answering like this! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
removed 0 Posted July 29, 2003 22 - The three cavities of the body are the head cavity, the tooth cavity and the abominable cavity. 23 - Most books say the sun is a star. But it still knows how to change back into the sun in the daytime. 31 - A circle is a figure with o corners and only one side. 32 - An example of animal breeding is the farmer who mated a bull that gave a great deal of milk with a bull with good meat. 33 - Water is composed of two gins, Oxygin and Hydrogin. Oxygin is pure gin. Hydrogin is gin and water. wow. scary. lol. (and i see this happen alot in science classes. theres alot of pretty dumb people around. lol) know what is REALLY scary?? I saw/heard answers like this in COLLEGE classes, and these were various science majors answering like this! youre right! that is scary! lol. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
barry 0 Posted September 14, 2003 There are some crackers on that list. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
