zipkirk1966 0 Posted October 24, 2005 All these are dead on lol Enjoy! Things that Never Happen in Star Trek • The Enterprise runs into a mysterious energy field of a type that it has encountered before. • The Enterprise goes to check up on a remote outpost of scientists who are all perfectly all right. • The Enterprise comes across a Garden-of-Eden-like planet called Paradise, where everyone is happy all the time. However, everything is soon revealed to be exactly as it seems. • The crew of the Enterprise discover a totally new lifeform, which later turns out to be a rather well-known old lifeform, wearing a silly hat. • The crew of the Enterprise are struck by a strange alien plague, for which the cure is found in the well-stocked sick-bay. • An enigmatic being composed of pure energy attempts to interface to the Enterprise's computer, only to find out that it has forgotten to bring the right leads. • A power surge on the Bridge is rapidly and correctly diagnosed as a faulty capacitor by the highly-trained and competent engineering staff. • A power surge on the Bridge fails to electrocute the user of a computer panel, due to a highly sophisticated 24th century surge protection feature called a 'fuse'. • The Enterprise ferries an alien VIP from one place to another without serious incident. • The Enterprise is captured by a vastly superior alien intelligence which does not put them on trial. • The Enterprise separates as soon as there is any danger. • The Enterprise gets involved in an enigmatic, strange, and dangerous situation, and there are no pesky aliens they can blame it on in the end. • The Enterprise is captured by a vastly inferior alien intelligence which they easily pacify with candy. • The Enterprise is involved in a bizarre time-warp phenomenon, which is in no way connected with the 20th century. • Somebody takes out a shuttle and it doesn't explode or crash. • A major Starfleet emergency breaks out near the Enterprise, and some other ships in the area are able to deal with it to everyone's satisfaction. • The shields on the Enterprise stay up during a battle. • The Enterprise visits the Klingon Home World on a bright, sunny day • An attempt at undermining the Klingon-Federation alliance is discovered without anyone noting that such an attempt, if successful, "would represent a fundamental shift of power throughout the quadrant." • A major character spends the entire episode in the Holodeck without a single malfunction trapping him/her there. • Picard hears the door chime and doesn't bother to say "Come." • Picard doesn't answer a suggestion with "Make it so"! • Picard walks up to a replicator and says, "Coke on ice." • Counsellor Troi states something other than the blindingly obvious. • Mood rings come back in style, jeopardizing Counselor Troi's position. • When Worf tells the bridge officers that something is entering visual range no one says "On screen." v • Worf actually gives another vessel more than 2 seconds to respond to one of the Enterprise's hails. • Wesley Crusher gets beaten up by his classmates for being a geek, and consequently has a go at making some friends of his own age for a change. • Guinan forgets herself, and breaks into a stand up comedy routine. • Data falls in love with the replicator. • Kirk (or Riker) falls in love with a woman on a planet he visits, and isn't tragically separated from her at the end of the episode. [or even: Kirk (or Riker) meets an attractive woman and does not fall in love.] • The Captain has to make a difficult decision about a less advanced people which is made a great deal easier by the Starfleet Prime Directive. • An unknown ensign beams down as part of an away team and lives to tell the tale. • Spock or Data is fired from his high-ranking position for not being able to understand the most basic nuances of about one in three sentences that anyone says to him. • Kirk gets into a fistfight and doesn't rip his shirt. • Kirk doesn't end up kissing the troubled guest-female before she doesn't sacrifice herself for him. • Spock isn't the only crew member not affected by new weapon/attack by alien race/etc!! due to his "darn green blood" or "bizarre Vulcan physiology" and thus he cannot save the day. • The episode ends without Bones & Kirk laughing at Spock's inability to understand the joke, and he doesn't raise his eybrow. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
youbroughtheryouRiker 2 Posted October 24, 2005 • Data falls in love with the replicator. A lot of them made me laugh, but this was my favorite. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Takara_Soong 4 Posted October 24, 2005 (edited) • Picard hears the door chime and doesn't bother to say "Come." 359707[/snapback] This one will need to come off the list because it happened in Night Terrors. LOL Picard was in his ready room and the chime kept sounding and he kept saying "come" and no one came in so after the second or third time the chime rang he got up to see who was outside his door and no one was there. Then when the chime rang twice again he ignored it until there was a knock on the door. Edited October 27, 2005 by Takara_Soong Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
