A l t e r E g o 9 Posted July 9, 2003 Top 10 Best (Worst) Ways to Kill Wesley Crusher Due to some potentially offending material I am adding a spoiler, enter at your own risk! Click for Spoiler: 10. After slugging down six Shirley Temple's in 10-forward, Wes stumbles to the holodeck, which he commands to "take me to hell." His broken body is later found on the empty holodeck in a pool of vomit. 9. Wesley gets gang-raped by a group of female Klingons. 8. Riker gets carried away executing an order from Picard to "knock the little snot around a bit." 7. Data catches him tossing off. Uncomprehending, he requires a detailed explanation from Wesley, who dies of embarrassment. 6. Extensive lab analysis of a green slime found on one of the control panels uncovers the fact that our favorite ensign has, once again, been picking his nose. He is summarily fired and commits suicide. 5. Wes gets gang-raped by a group of male Klingons. 4. On an earlier episode, Wes got to kiss a girl who turned into a Chewbacca-like creature. Here, she returns, and they once again get involved. (Un)fortunately, once she gets really heated, she mutates back into a wookie and forces Wesley to be her cringing sex slave. She then tears him limb from limb and eats him. 3. In a rare episode involving characters from both ST and ST:TNG, Spock attempts a Vulcan mind-meld with Wesley. Wesley's head explodes. Spock barely survives, spending the next several days scratching himself and whining. 2. Worf notices a Romulan ship on the scanners, and sends Wesley down to clean out the photon tubes. Later, someone makes a comment about the needs of the many having outweighed the needs of the few. 1. Wes gets involved in a deviant sexual practice known as "tribble stuffing," not realizing that tribbles multiply any where. Even an emergency laser enema by Dr. Crusher fails to save him Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mrskirk 0 Posted July 9, 2003 Tribble stuffing! EWWWWW! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lessa_Soong 0 Posted July 9, 2003 OMG. funny, very funny! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
A Z 0 Posted September 30, 2003 hahahahaha! i had no idea that fel...err...stuffing would be a joke here! LOL! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
barry 0 Posted September 30, 2003 Number 9 is great: Wesley gets ganged raped by a group of female Klingons Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Riaan 0 Posted October 2, 2003 I loved #2 2. Worf notices a Romulan ship on the scanners, and sends Wesley down to clean out the photon tubes. Later, someone makes a comment about the needs of the many having outweighed the needs of the few. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Captain Bolivar 0 Posted October 4, 2003 That was the funniest Star Trek joke thing I have ever read! I liked the comment about the needs of the many outweighing the needs of the few. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites