BlueCrystal

I'd rather walk off a cliff. Which would you rather do, take a mud bath it Dana Troi's mother or dance with Data?

The rigging of the pulley system was the most frightening thing I had done in my life. Far more frightening than moving into the *English* world with Daniel. After 16 years of marriage I learned a lot and loved my life with Daniel. I had finished running the coax and making the antenna to Daniel's design. He stood in the mirror looking grim. "It won't be strong enough Pretty Girl. We're going to have to use more power." "Daniel what more can we do I have built everything as you told to, I haven't complained much. How can we get more power?" I sipped my coke and stared at him in one of the mirrored panels. "Those micro-wave dishes." Daniel said then hesitated. "I know I told you that they were the wrong wave length but..." "But what Daniel?" I demand. "Their our last chance. H*ll Crystal maybe you should go and live at EDEN, Phi...I can't make promises to you that it will work and it most definitely won't be safe." Tears stunk my eyes and I look at Daniel's form. "You said Phil didn't you?" Daniel nodded,"Phil's been helping us Crystal, he's been beside me all along coaching me and you to build the transmitter. He teaches Physics and when he said we may have to go digital with this I put the brakes on." "So if Phil is with you why..why can't I see him?" I questioned remorsefully. "Because Pretty Girl, it's not your eyes that are seeing me, it's your soul. That's true love. I can't be kept from you or shielded, you know me in any form I could or would take." Daniel whispered.

I leaned against the mirror and felt as though I had been crashed. I felt hurt and upset. "You want to give up, don't you Daniel?" Daniel shook his head no and bit his lip. I could see fear in his eyes, for the first time I had ever known him I saw fear and maybe the glimmer of tears. He shut his eyes tight and then I saw his image waver. Daniel looked away then nodded his head and started to fade. I cried out. "Daniel!!! Daniel please don't leave me here. I've done everything you asked! Please!!!" Daniel's image appeared next to mine and his hand pressed against the glass where mine were. "I love you," he whispered. "I love you," I said through my tears then went on, "ask Phil, what we we need to do now?"

Spock if those two are my only choices. Who would you want to sit with on movie night. Phlox or Travis?

Play a game. Would you rather snap beans or shuck corn?

I didn't think this game was about wrong or right but just choosing the lesser of two evils. Not everyone is *Christian* so scriptural references may not mean anything.

If I have to choose between spiders and snakes, I'd choose spiders. Would you, if given the choice, KILL or MAIM a person that brutally raped you or a family member?

That was hard. I love all the doctors on series but the two I want to work on me in my *Trek World Fantasy* would be Voyager's EMH/The Doctor or because he may have different ideas about proper treatment being that he's non-human, Dr Phlox.

Good thing I never had children, or it would have been Myrtle for a girl and Stanley for a boy.

Just kidding. A son would of been called Sairrin and a daughter would of be Jen'Nyssa or Bethia

Oh that's easy...have a child in the past.

If you were captain would you marry a "Q" or a have sex with a Vulcan?

:) Too bad we didn't see Sam Beckett step in to the Quantum Leap Accelerator and disappear. :)

I have to admit in reading this when I think about the times I tried to nurture Daniel's sons I wasn't to keen on the idea. I held *personal* resentments about having to *mother* another woman's children. It took me a great deal of time to realize it didn't matter and that they were my husband's and my children by marriage and nature took over and I raised Daniel II like he was my own son.

Just finished reading Jack Donner's interview about Home and thinking about the time that my mother tried to arrange a marriage for me with a creep that was anything but nice but could do a nunber on my mother with ease.

I'm number 6 of 7 children. I was the baby of the family for 9 years and then came my kid brother. My eldest brother is 9 years older than me so in effect there is 18 years between my oldest and youngest brothers ages.

My husband is an only child and though my father and mother-in-laws could of probably had more, Daniel was enough for the both of them. He is very opinionated, likeable, and seems to have friends all over. The funny thing is he's kind of shy and refers to my family as a mob and seems uncomfortable with several of my siblings, in-laws, nephews and niece.

I crawled out of my bed and stretched, yawning, I opened the small frig in the sleeper and took a sip of coke. I wasn't the best thing for me in the morning but it was something. I had been working so hard everything else was put lower on the list. The dogs ran wild now and often crawled under the trailers to sleep or play. I left a large pan of bottled water for them and feed them their dog food. It was windy out today and I sat for the moment watching the towers shift and sway in the wind. I was concerned about motion of the towers when Daniel appeared in the right wing mirror of the truck. Daniel smiled and said, "Pretty One, they're designed to sway." I looked startled at his reflection, "how did you know I was wondering that?" "I wondered that too when I first came to a tower to cut the grass, that was how I paid my dues to the club." Daniel admitted, he was poor but he could work and it was a trade. No one else would do the work around the tower that his clubs radio repeater was on so he did it.

I worked on building the repeater as Daniel instructed using each and every component that he requested. I was his hands and I angled mirrors so he could see everything I was doing. Occasionally he got ahead of himself and had to repeat his instructions several times. I felt tired and frustrated but continued to do his will. I was fearful when he told me I would have to run more coax cable up the towers at the 50 foot level and then I also need to climb the tower as we need to set a pulley system up and run the cable of the wench through it. That would be another 50 feet up it was his way of saying I was going up 100 ft. without trying to cause me fear or panic. In the utility truck I borrowed I found climbing gear so I knew I wasn't the first to scale one of the towers. "Daniel," I protested, "50 feet is high and I may not survive a fall from that now you are wanting me to go up a 100 feet and rig a pulley. Why?!?!" Daniel was insistent, "If you listen to me you won't fall and it has to be done and done my way. Please Pretty One, if I could I would do it myself." I wordlessly agreed.

How about key-lime pie? Or a moon-pie and a RC cola!

The hours past in mere blurs as I have appropriated a truck with a cherry picker and wench on it from 'Voice of America's' maintenance department less than 2 miles away. I didn't mine the walk but sped back in a hurry to get to work. As I passed a huge microwave transmitter/receive site, I stopped hard looking at it. I then reached up and angled the rearview mirror so I could sit and see if Daniel was with me. I called out, "Daniel! Daniel, what about the satellite dishes?" The mirror stood void of Daniel. As I started down the road towards the towers, breathlessly Daniel appeared. "Give a man a minute to get to you. I'm not God, I can't be everywhere. I saw the dishes back there when we came and dropped the trailers off. We can't use them, the wave lengths would be all wrong." "Can't we modify them to work?" I questioned. Daniel shook his head, no, then answered, "it's not just the wave lengths it also the harmonics. We have to do this my way Pretty Girl."

I learned to cut the mirrored glass and piece the panels together like a seamless quilt. The glass had to be angled in a large circle set as a 45 degree angle within the three towers that formed a triangle. As the night fell I managed to finish installing the last of the floodlights about 30 feet about the ground using coax cable and the towers themselves as supports for the lights. I felt under pressure to finish Daniel's vision as quickly as I could. I had throughout the course of my work overcame my fear of heights. Daniel urged me to get some sleep but still the radio repeaters had to be built and oh so much to do. I collapsed on the bunk of the truck with my laptop laying open about to log on to Startrekfans.net. Daniel must of seen the screen waiting for my password and with what must of been his touch the computer shut itself off. His reflection whispered as his warming energy touched and rubbed my shoulders, "There will be another time to visit your friends Pretty One."

I stared at the laptops computer screen reading Jeanway's advertisement about EDEN. It was early in the morning as most mornings I woke before dawn by habit. Daniel's faint reflection shown in the screen, "What are you doing?" he asked. "I'm reading about a place called 'EDEN', there are other survivors Daniel and they're building a settlement on the Amish farms in Indiana." Daniel seemed to look away as I saw his image in profile now, "I use to regret the choice I made you make. Leaving home and the only world and life you knew behind." I reached over touching the computer screen that held his image. "Daniel with you I gained more than I lost. I'd 'jump the fence' all over again for you."

It was not the time for regrets. I grew up being educated at my parents home along side of my siblings. My education was suppose to end for me at the 8th grade level. I can remember how angry my father was when he discovered I was going to college. I remembered being on 'rumspringa' and working in a diner where I first met Daniel. He was so very different from the boys I grew up with and the ones that would call for me. When Daniel came to my parents home looking for me that cold rainy night in February. My mother was so upset, she told me I could never be with Daniel and remain with them. They threw Daniel out and I ran out after him. After that, I was with Daniel in the 'English' world.

The old farmhouse was a bit shabby but I'm sure that owners loved the place. In the small bathroom I found a claw footed bath basin. When I filled the tub with hot water I could hear the pipes rattling against the walls as it force the water down the faucet and out into the tub. I undressed leaving my clothes on the floor and laid back into the old tub. The steam bellowed up into the room and I felt warm for the first time in days. I watched the mirrors as Daniel's image seemed to jump from one mirror to another. I summized that he was looking the place over.

Daniel seem to be watching me bathe with interest, I pretended not to notice. I dried off, dressed myself and we left the old farm as we found it. As we drove away I caught a look of longing in Daniel's eyes and without saying it I knew what that look meant. I felt a blush rise to my checks. Daniel chuckled, "Feeling sick, Pretty One?" I just shook my head 'No' and kept driving. We arrived at 'Voice of America' shortly thereafter. I broke a pad lock off the fence with a crowbar and pushed the gates open wide. I ignored the signs posted warning of high RF and a number of other danger signs. I drove the truck up to the towers as near as I could get and left the one trailer there and then went and retrieved the other one I had left in a parking area nearby. In the morning I would start to build that which Daniel invisioned. I was still clueless to the design but as I laid in the bunk I saw Daniel's reflection on the screen of the laptop. "We're gonna need a truck with a big wench, maybe a cherry picker too." I nodded in agreement and whispered softly, "I love you Daniel." It was then I felt the warmth of what I believe was Daniel encircle me. I reached over and turned off a small lamp and in that instant I can't be sure but ....I must of dreamed Daniel and I made love.

Two words.

I called the dogs in after they made the rounds of a neighborhood in Dayton. It was a cold rainy autumn day and we were headed back to 'Voice of America' taking the scenic route. The trailer I found wasn't the best but it served our purpose and I had finished stripping the yet another mall of mirrors Daniel agreed that we had enough. We then headed to a store that exclusively sold amateur radio equipment. It took us hours to get there and then I made the discovery that the shop was closed. Breaking in was very difficult but I managed to smash in the glass panel door. I cut my left forearm during the ordeal and I was so angry and frustrated I cried not in pain but in anger. Daniel's image stood powerless in a display case and he look at me as if he would give anything to just hold me and rock in his arms. I felt as through I was encircled by heat and I knew it was Daniel trying to comfort me. I dried my eyes, as Daniel spoke softly and gently to me. "It's alright Pretty One, don't cry." I felt like a little girl that fell down and skinned her knee. Daniel had insisted that I show it to him and I held my arm up to the mirror above the sink in the bathroom. After a few minutes I found a first aid kit and cleaned and dressed my wound.

I worked hard getting the equipment he wanted and packing it into the truck. Soon we had moved on to the local hardware store and I took a case of duct tape, tools, over 20 flood lights, the brightest bulbs I could find, and several glass cutters. My crime spree had just begun as I move from there to a boutique that must of catered to the higher classes I took a several changes of clothes and a warm jacket as I had felt chilled with the cold and wet weather during the day. The local drugstore was my next stop for things I needed to treatment injured arm.

Night was now falling on us and I wasn't familiar with the area, there weren't any restaurants or motels so I found out in the boonies a farmhouse and stopped there for the night. The dogs needed to be fed and I wanted a hot bath.

BlueCrystal's Personal Log

I'm not even certain what day it is anymore. They come and go in blurs. I'm so tired, I sleep soundly throughout most of the nights but I often have nightmares. I find myself thinking back to a really old Twilight Zone program. It's about a man that discovers he's all alone in the world and his only desire is to go to a great library and read the books. He stumbles and breaks his glasses on some stairs and can't see well enough without them to read. I feel that way at times, I know Daniel is laying beside me but with my eyes I can't see him and only when I lift up my hand mirror can I see him beside me...

We left our trailer and I'm trying to get through Dayton and find another trailer. As we will still need more mirrors and oh coax cable. (D*mn I wish studied better and not just memorized the answers. Who'd of thought I would actually have to know this stuff.) It's hard to think straight...I must be tired. I still think this can't be happening! Daniel has be a blessing to me so calm and loving. He knows I'm scared but always he's with me. I'm going to sleep now...

Another mall another stash of mirrors. We were getting closer to home and I knew where I was at now. Daniel didn't have to direct me to the last four malls. The truck was nearly full when Daniel said another truckload after this should do it.

I was stunned and alittle upset. Those mirrors were heavy! "Another truckload of mirrors! Daniel, I'm not a pack animal." I protested and then regretted it upon looking into the reflection and seeing his eyes. "Pretty One, I know it's hard work and you're tired but you have to do it. If I could help you I would and on this end I am helping you but where you are you can't tell." I apologized and took a sip of my coke that I got from my last visit to a mall. "I guess, I'm lucky most husbands wouldn't want their wives anywhere near a mall." I said trying to focus our conversation on something else.

The state route that ran near our house wasn't far now and I was preparing to make my turn when Daniel stopped me. "Not that way Pretty Girl! We're not going home, head on and I'll direct you we have to drop our trailer off." It was another two hours but it seemed like longer when we arrived at 'Voice of America'. It was a vast park where high towers held antienas and transmitted via radio waves around the world.

The evening fell as I pulled into a rest area and used the facilities, usually I'd be scared to go in the dark but I knew there was no one around. Daniel offered to go with me but I knew he was tired too. I promised to be back soon. I stopped at the vending machines and bought a coke and some snacks for my dinner.

I found the truck quiet and called the dogs in as they roamed about the rest areas grounds doing their business. They settled in to the driver and passenger seat to sleep. I laid down on my belly with laptop in hand and took a quick glance in my compact mirror to see Daniel beside me fast asleep in the bunk.

I decided that I would log on to startrekfans.net and write alittle in my personal log.

BlueCrystal's Personal Log

It seems we travel from sun up to sun down in our quest to find large mirrors. Daniel hasn't actually said why he wants them but the world is big and very empty now with only a few thousand souls left on it. I have to admit I'm frightened, I know there are people here but I feel very much alone. I haven't mention to Daniel my finding anyone on here as, despite his love for me, he is like my mother when it comes to my love or interest in science fiction. To Daniel's honor I have to say that rather than discourage my reading science fiction he has encouraged me to write it. He wants me to be happy. I haven't told Daniel but I find the malls to be spooky. Earlier this afternoon I nearly drop a mirror when a stepped on a child's toy. It was a doll that said, 'Momma'. Maybe that's what's keeping me awake, not the toy or the child, just the feeling of loss and the unanswered question. 'WHY?!?!?'

:lol: :angry: :) :)

:angry: I would be in communications or a botanist. My dear husband would be a rogue, that I would be or fall madly in love with. Better put me on Voyager at least there Daniel and I might have a chance to develop our futures together even though I'm a bit of a ENT girl.