LOL

Well since i Myself am Captain of my own vessell ,Abmiral of the British Fleet and Ambassador to the Australian teretorries..I cannot do anything to myself

wereborg-gets the plank..after being flogged with a bible of course

Nemesis-gets exported to canada in a crate

Who's next tina? Or should I just make some people up?

Sarge--Swab the deck, then gimme 50.

Master Q--Scraping barnacles from the keel.

Nemesis--walk the plank

next victims...

AE

VBG

Takara Soong

ALTEREGO GETS 20 LASHES FROM THE COMMODORE JUST FOR BEING A BAD BOY

TAKARA, GETS PUT IN THE STOCKS FOR A WEEK SO WE CAN THROW STUFF AT HER FOR BEING AWAY SO MUCH LATELY

VBG GETS LEAD WEIGHTS TIED AROUND HIS NECK THEN MARCHED RIGHT OFF THE PLANK BLINDFOLDED, BEGGING AND CRYING THE WHOLE TIME. OOPS, SAID THE WRONG THING, RUNS AND HIDES BEHIND ALTEREGO

OK, SINCE IT'S GET EVEN WITH THE MODS DAY:

ddillard

Spacetigger

master Q

ddillard tied to the mast

spacetigger hung over a circleing group of sharks.

master q walks the plank

Next victims:

Ambassadortinadoll
VBG
Jeanway

I am not getting thrown OVERBOARD

Lets VGB drink some rum

and shoot jeanway out a cannon

Edmcgon
Nemesis
EJP( )

Hey, Hey, I say, Captain Ambassadore Tinadoll, thinks she's too good for all this, swabbie, tie a rope around her ankle and hoist her up the to the Mainsail and let her dangle for a while. La La


OH My, Edmacgon, been into the salt cod I see, a little too much Aye?? Laps, 100 laps around the deck, and step lively Man, that's an order!!!!!

Nemesis gonna strap you to the keen like a figurehead and let the Ocean take care of you for a while, tee hee. Raise that topsail, let's get moving.

EJP, get nervous, runs at full tilt, does a swan dive off the plank, up and over he goes.


HeadBorg

It van Roy

Doc 42

gets the swabbing
heh heh plank
doc gets the rum barrel

Wereborg you absent minded Putz..You forgot to add the three names


::shoots Jeanway,who is STILL a Capatin out a cannon and into the side of the HMS Whatever its name is::

golfer
basketball player
baseball player

well i guess ill make up a few

jeanway tied up to the mast, with fen torturing.

EJPM forced to join the marines for a week, cant think of much worse than that for a navy guy. just kiddin jim

myself to walk the plank

OH YEA, CAPT.WRIGHT!!! ME GETTING TORTURED BY FEN, THAT'S REALLY LOW..........OFF WITH HIS HEAD!!!!! SSSLLLLIIIICEEE, HEAD ROLLS DOWN THE DECK INTO THE SWILLBUCKET, BINGO!!!! I'LL TEACH YOU YOU WARMONGER!!!

OUCH. that hurts. i said i walk the plank. what can be worse than bein eatin by sharks.

CAPTAIN'S LOG, SUPPLEMENTAL:

WAS AWAKE MOST OF THE NIGHT TRYING TO THINK OF WAYS TO TORTURE ILIKESEVEN. FIRST THING, HE CAN ONLY EAT THE DEAD RATS WE FIND HERE ON THE SHIP. ONLY WATER HE'LL GET COMES FROM THE LATREEN. AND GOT TO FIND WORF AND THROW HIM IN THE BRIG WITH HIM, I HEAR HE'S GOING THROUGH PON-FARR RIGHT ABOUT NOW THAT OUGHT TO KEEP HIM BUSY FOR A WHILE COMMODORE JEANWAY IS HAPPY AND OUT.

Prissoner,slog supplemental

Nothing new happend today. Jeanway let me eat rats(yummy)
but the water she gives me tastes funny.
Tommorow a new prissoner will be put in my brig, maybe we can have nice long talks together
I hope my friend tinadoll will save me soon from this brig, becouse i have a terrible itch on my foot and i cant reach it.

-ILIKESEVEN out-

Strapped icebag onto Ilikeseven's itchy foot to relieve the itching, I'm not totally heartless, I know what that's like Tina can't help you now.



Three new victims:


WORF { PIECE OF CAKE} ILIKESEVEN, PUCKER UP!

KLAANG

B'LANNA TORRES

Worf, down in the hold with Ilikeseven

i feel somesort of anger between Jeanway an ILIKESEVEN,
Please explane?

No, I'm not angry with Ilikeseven You angry with me ILS?

Worf - go to the brig with ILIKESEVEN!!!
Klaang - Rum
B'Ellana - off the plank!


Paris
Janeway
Chakotay

Thank you Harry, I see what you did, that was very considerate of you.


Screaming and growling noises are coming from below deck right now Alot of banging and crashing sounds too. Sounds like Worf and Ilikeseven are getting to know each other, real good HAVING FUN YET ILS???

CHAKOTAY gets locked in the Captain's quarters for further considerations


Janeway, go below deck and watch

Paris, Ah Paris, go clean up the deck of eveyone who's not moving, then run him right off the plank, and take nik with you, { Classical Electrodynamics } goes off too.

Hangon

V Seven

Capt. Jon-Luc Picard

Hangon gets to swab the deck, I wanna see it shine bucko, and none o' that it's wood it can't shine. Swab ye scurvy dog ye!

V Seven gets to polish me treasure, cause a Capn' likes his loot shiny.

Capn. Jean-Luc Picard dances a jig on the end o' the plank fer the amusement of the crew, dance me bucko, DANCE! Or it's into the drink for ye.

So says the Cap'n of the S.S. Perwinkle, smurfingest ship o' cutsmurfs on the high seas. ARRR!!!

Don't git yer draws in a mess here be yer belated choices,

Larry

Curly

Mo

and fer good measure...Shemp

Captain's Log:

I made it to the forward deck and blessed this wretched fleet. Took up the spyglass and saw some sort of floating mattress with sails off the port bow. THOUGHT BUBBLE APPEARS:: What the H*LL is that???
Worf and Ilikeseven have finally quieted down after many hours of Mayhem below deck. I think they're sleeping together now I'll let him go at dawn in a dingy with enough provisions to get him back to Holland. I'll just keep Worf onboard for a while to scare off any other trouble makers we might come across. Commodore Jeanway Out.

they all get the plank...


since we're on the topic of pirates...


Have you seen the new pirate movie???
It's rated ARRRRRR....

....................Sets ILikeSeven adrift at dawn in small dingy.

Hope that's the LAST I see of him

::waves bye-bye::



{ Sure hope he doesn't catch up with Tidadoll }

Captians Log Suplimental

The HMS Whatever its name is is on the horizon in back of us,I am most confident that we can out run her and out gun her.We are a fater more deadly clipper ship than she is a rusty old garbage scouw.Her captain is inexperienced and likes to throw people overboard. I have already added 10 of her former crew as my own.Ilikeseven her Bosains mate is in a dingy behind her and when there is more light we will play a litle target practice at 30 paces..

Paces????? So now you walk on water???AYE?? Nice trick!


Gives orders to unfurl the mainsail and comes about, headed straight for the H.M.S. ENTERPRIZE. At full tilt, rams her starboard side, sounds of crunching wood and screaming men fill the air, men drop from the masts like fleas off some srcoungy dog, she's going down, VICTORY, ALASS!!!!

Not wanting to miss the action, nik’s ancient galleon can be spotted on the horizon drawing closer at an unbelievable rate. It is the “Pax Mediterranevm,” ghostly apparition of the flagship of the imperial fleet of Octavian, freed from the depths of Neptvne’s cold grasp to havnt the svrface of the deep. Her gold-tipped oars glint in the svnlight and her three sqvare sails billow as she slices through the blood-stained swells. Nik stands at the prow sqvinting into the svnlight, his locks blowing behind him as the spray splashes onto his leather plate armor. He is flanked by the shimmering ghosts of his ancestors – to each side a bvlky centvrion, each resting a hand on the hilt of his sword and standing motionless.

With a snap of his fingers, nik orders the “Pax” to come abovt. She leans heavily into the tvrn as she approaches the fray. As she skims effortlessly across the water, pieces of flotsam are tossed aside in her wake. With a loud crvnch, her ram splinters the majestically diminvtive vessel piloted by ILIKESEVEN. Nik glances impassively as SEVEN grasps a piece of floating board, left to the mercy of the leviathan. The “Pax” continves her rapid pursuit. As his vessel glides silently past the wreckage of the Enterprize bovnd in a deathly embrace with her prey, nik nods expressionlessly to the Commodore and the Ambassador while his centvrions each snap a sharp salvte.

The Pax continves into the mist, and eventvally vanishes to havnt other seas. She leaves bvt a single object floating in her wake….. a clay vase with a scroll sticking ovt the top. It bobs gently in the now calm waters.

::through her spygalss she sees here Nemesis Jean in the Whatever and Nik in the pax comeabout::

She orders her crew to open sails and chart a course to the Caymans to rendevous with THE BLACK PEARL

Atop in the crow's nest Jeanway spots a small object bobbing up and down in the chops. She orders one of the crewmen to use the grabbeling hook to retrieve it from the Ocean. A midshipman couriers it to Jeanway as she stands on the bow watching the 'PAX' rescuing the crew from the aforementioned sinking vessel. She opens the vessel and reaches in to retrieve a scroll of parchment, she unrolls it and reads this message silently to herself. She looks up and sees the Captain of the 'Pax' standing on his aft deck and waving to her. It's ghostly sails billowing in the wind. She salutes him and goes below deck, to her quarters.

Reaching the Caymans she sees her ex-boyfriend Capt Jack sleeping on the beach.She orders a boarding part and rows a boat to the shore..:::she kicks him::

JACK WAKE UP!::he does not budge::

FREE RUM!!! :: He wakes with a start:: Where where..o its only you love..Were you come from?

::i point to the Enterprise:: its a nice boat..But dat does not explain why you woke me...

The Uss Whatever has joined forces with the Ghost ship Pax

^*(@)&E(*)!@&#_( is all jack says as he jumps into the boat and they row towards the ships to go into battle

Jeanway pulls up along side of the U.S.S. Periwinkle. Orders crew to board this freaky little, PUFFY ship, pilfer it and take all aboard as prisoners of war. This is when she meets the Captain of the rag, tag, fugitive ship. A Captain Fenriz Sparks fly as their eyes first fall upon each other. We need to form an an alliance, we will be dealing with some unsavory characters soon and need all the help we can muster. TinaDoll is a formidable opponent in this war and Jeanway is a bit on edge. Since the 'PAX' rescued her and her crew from their sinking ship. I am confided they will be back to do more battle.

Deciding to take a vacation..She returns to the shore with jack and they sing a Pirates life for me

In the distance, the Pax tilts sharply vpon her keel as she comes abovt, and.... stops. Her sails go limp, and her oars retract as she comes to a lifeless halt in the sea. The eyes of her golden figvrehead blaze as they stare at the Commodore from accross the leagves.

Nik stands motionless vpon a bvlkhead as he stares intently at the Commodore, his arms crossed over his breastplate. It is not withovt a certain amovnt of cvriosity that nik waits patiently to see what the Commodore will do next.

Rum Rum and more rum

there i was in my dingy rowing the great ocean all alone, since the day that woman kicked me overboard in this nutshell i allready start to miss my compagnion Worf, altough we did not speak much, he was not bad compagny.

One thing i must atmid she did not leave me without water even if it tast funny.
may if i row hard enough i will encounter as ship or maybe even a island with golden beaches and native woman with.......... nah i think i will not have that luck(sips from his waterflask) sure tastes funny(starts to eat rat) Hmmm meat.

(rows on into the sunset)

Taking pity on the coarse Visigoth floating vpon a shell of wood in the raging seas, nik whistles a qvavering note which echoes eerily across the water. All is still for an instant, save for a small whirlpool before ILIKESEVEN's remains of a vessel. The tvrbvlence grows in intensity, and a dvll roar eminates from the pits of the deep. ILS's flanks of wood are tossed abovt in the now roiling oceans.

From the deep, a gloriovs reptilian creatvre rises, it's lvminescent scales glittering as jewels as water rains off it's back. It stands a fvll fvrlong in height from the deep; ILS is paralyzed in fear as he recognizes a familiar Chinese water dragon whom he once tormented, this time
achieving god-like proportions. Nik looks on passively as the dragon's nostils flare, and
it's penetrating gaze looks hvngrily upon ILS. It releases a deafening roar which ripples across the vnforgiving svrface of the water. In a single qvick motion, the dragon bends down and swallows ILS whole. The dragon glances abovt qvickly, winks qvickly at the Commodore, and plvnges into the abysmal deep with a lovd splash.

All is qviet again. The smirk on nik's face qvickly disappears, and he re-affixes his gaze on the Commodore..... waiting.....



Three day's later, the dragon vomits it's prey on the northern shores of what was once ancient Gavl, from whence the vvlgar ILS came. His clothes digested, his skin bleached white, and his mind clvtching a few remaining remnants of sanity, ILS lies exhavsted in a pool of dragon vomit, home at last........

AAAAAGGGHHHHGGGRRRGGG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!.............................
I woke up in a pile of sweat, i must have fallen asleep is sat up and saw nothing but blue ocean, then i realised it was a terrefing nightmare, damn i swear if i am ever going to be saved i wil never tormend a chinees water dragon again, and with a litte luck i will encounter a ship, but first i must drink this terrible water, each day is tastes worse like it,s not water but..but..aaagggghhhhh

Jeanway sits quietly in her cabin. By the light of a single candle she again unrolls the parchment. It's jewel encrusted, gold staff glistens in the firelight. The Treasure Map dispatched to her by way of the Ocean currents from an unknown source now haunting her , it's message is taunting her. " BY YOUR RIGHT AND YOUR RIVAL'S LEFT IS THE MYSTERY REVEALED". What can this mean? Which rival, there are so many? She spreads the map out on her large, wooden table and holds the candle over it, moving it slowly across the images. She sees that half of the map has been somehow erased, leaving only half of what appears to be a small uninhabited island. But which island? Where is it? Perhaps the maps I have in my quarters may shed some light on this mystery, she thinks. She goes to her large trunk and opens the lid. Revealing stacks of maps she has made through out her voyages. She pulls them out, one by one comparing the one half of this tiny island to each one, then discarding them in a pile on the floor. She continues doing this through the night. Then falls asleep on the floor around dawn, still searching for this tiny island, surrounded by her maps.

The captain of the late ship Periwinkle watches the golden haired captain of the Enterprise pour over charts throughout the night. Curiousity stirs in him, is she searching for some hidden island? A vast treasure from some long dead pirate king to be discovered? His piratical heart stirs at the thought of such a prize but he finds his attention fixed on his captor. He watches her while the hulking brute of a Klingon she keeps for a bodyguard glares at him throughout the night. Shortly before dawn both the captain of the Enterprise and her bodyguard fall asleep and former captain Fenriz walks quietly over to the sleeping figure on the floor surrounded by scrolls and charts. After casting a glance at the jewel encrusted parchment under her hand he tosses a small blanket over her and quietly leaves the cabin. Heading above deck Fenriz finds his thoughts on the captain of the Enterprise and the island she hunts for, " If only I can get rid of that damned Klingon..." he thinks to himself.

um, WHERE WERE WE? :: SHAKES MOTHS OUT OF HER HEAD::


Worf

nik

ILikeSeven How'd he get back here so qiuck????


EnsignRo

RikerChick

Tina

Worf - walk the plank ye Klingon dog, to the sharks with ye, if they can stomach the likes o' ye

nik - gits yer scurvy hide to polishin' that breastplate o' yers, I wants to see me face grinnin' back at me

ILikeSeven - rum for ye, ye sorry sea dog. Gittin' spit back by a sea serpent be a heap o' rejection on yer hide so drown ye sorrows bucko. Course ye go back into brig come dawn with the Klingon if the fishes spit him back as well

EnsignRo - ye gits to polish all the cannonballs on the ship cause we wants em to sparkle when they send some sorry louts to the bottom o' the deep

RikerChick - ye gits to whip this sorry crew inta shape, lazy bunch o' lubbers, keeps a close eye on that shifty Ro, she be eye'n the Capn's she I'll wager

Tina - more rum for ye! ye cant's shoot back none too straight if'n ye be 3 sheets to tha wind.

Here be yer choices ye sorry excuses for black hearted heathens:

Cap'n Hook

Cap'n Blood

Cap'n Crunch

Hook gets the plank...
blood gets the swabbin
crunch gets the rumm...

Wesley
Lwxana
Seska

EEWWW, Seska, I want her. I'm recuiting HER as a spy,


Lwxana, gets shipped to the galley, we need a cook


Wesley, sorry buddy, we've got enough cute guys on the ship already, off you go.


WeareBorg

Harry Kim

Nemesis

WeareBorg be gittin' tied to the main mast til he refers to hisself in the singular, ye be but one bucko nay a bunch ye collective brained loon.

Harry Kim be assigned to the galley ta pick the weevils out o' the moldy bread.

Nemesis be sent of a the plank cause the sharks like canadian bait, kick wit yer feet lad and maybe they'll not bite ya, much.

Here be 3 more for ye sadistic delight, ye trek ma scoundrels ye.

Fat Elvis

Skinny Elvis

Elvis Costello

" By my right and my rivals left?" HHMM, are we thinking of a country nik? Perhaps France and Holland? Or are we thinking about Gavl? Jeanway thinks.

Nik nods almost impreceptibly across the now still waters at the Commodore. From admidships aboard his ancient vessel, an object flies straight into the air. It moves slowly towards the Commodore. As it approaches, Jeanway recognizes it as a very familiar parrot. It lands graefully on the starboard bulkhead. In it's right claw is a folded piece of tattered parchment, which is holds out to the Commodore......

Looking up at the sky, Jeanway notices a small object in the distance. She picks up her spyglass and holds it up to one eye. Ah, she smiles, recognizing this messenger from the Gods of Yore. She holds out her right hand and the large Patagonian lands gently on her forearm, bows to her then holds out his talon which has a message tied to it. She gently places the bird down on the ballistrade and procedes to untie it from his leg. She kisses him gently on the top of his plume and he bows and leaps off backwards into the air, cawwing a farewell as he rights himself in the air and flys off. She unfolds the message and reads it, then peers across the calm expanse of Ocean at a ship on the horizon, with a lone figure standing atop it's bow. Thank you nik

Jeanway, in deep thought, makes her way aft. On a wooden arm-chair she sits and stares out over the endless blue expanse in front of her, as the sun goes down and the gulls circle the ship, she lights a lantern and remains there, alone.

Nik's smile is almost imperceptible and he bows his head to the Commodore. Sqvinting into the svnlight, he spots his bird as it glides towards him. The colored avian perches on nik's shovlder, and he gives a drink from a silver chalice. After drinking himself, nik sets the cup on the railing and sits himself, his legs hanging over the edge. He sets a large folded parchment in his lap and begins reading, becoming engaged in what he reads. Were she to look through her spyglass, the Commodore would make ovt some large lettering on the ovtside of the sheets: "Classical Electrodynamics, by
J.D. Jackson." Nik nod's occassionally as he read, reaching for his chalice for an occassional sip, making svre to offer some to his parrot first.

Ex-Captain Fenriz watches the Commodore of the Enterprise make her way to the aft of the ship, followed by her Klingon lackey. Going over the unusual exchange between her and the bird earlier his curiosity is peaked, already enthralled with the woman and the cryptic mission she's on, he mulls over a plan to distract that lumbering goon she has guarding her. Pulling an orange he liberated from a sleeping rum-addled sailor earlier he tosses it on the deck. Several half-crazed and starving cutthroats see it simultaneously and a viscious brawl erupts. From aft of the ship comes a growl followed by the Klingon, intent on ending this fight his way. Letting him pass and smiling at his success, Fenriz bows to the now occupied Klingon and then makes his way aft.

Jeanway not concerned with the maylay she hears behind her keeps her eyes fixed on the horizon. The Aurora-Borealus is distracting and magnetic. A hand suddenly is placed on her shoulder and she turns her head and is greeted with a smiling Captain Fenriz holding an orange in his hand for her. " Thank you" she says sweetly, " this will taste good right about now". He sits at her feet, knowing any sign of aggression towards her could land him in the brig. She peels the orange tossing the rind overboard in large pieces then splits it in half and offers it to her obviously enamoured companion. He takes it and smiles at her, she smiles back at him. They silently enjoy the orange and each others company.

GGRRRRRRRRRRR, they hear behind them. As the massive Klingon lumbers towards them. He lunges for Fenriz and Jeanway jumps up off her chair and between them. "NO!" she says to Worf, " You do not touch this man in any manner!" She stated firmly, then ordered him to midships and to wait for her there.
" Sorry about that " she said to Fenriz " we'll have to have a little talk, I'll straighten him out" Fenriz and Jeanway walked the deck and talked until dawn, when her, Fenriz and Worf all retired to her quarters, once again. Worf and Fenriz sharing a bunk in the corner and Jeanway to her own bed. Worf growled repeatedly at Fenriz, and Fenriz had a difficult time closing his eyes, he slept with one eye open and the other eye on Jeanway.