Funny Things Kids Say/Do

[Takara_Soong 4]

I had to post this topic because of something my daughter did yesterday.

 

On Saturday morning she decided to put the Space Channel on and TOS was on at the time. The episode was Trouble with Tribbles and she LOVED it. She's been talking about tribbles since then. Yesterday she was on the computer when I heard her singing "The tribbles on the dell, the tribbles on the dell hi ho the derrio the tribbles on the dell". What made this even funnier is she was looking at the episode synopsis for the TWT episode at the time and our computer is a Dell. ROFL

 

Do you have any kid stories to share?

[trekzone 0]

hehe - my little sis sings in the shower! thats funny, cause all she can do is a high pitch - something

[nik 0]

Having two boys three and under, every day brings a funny new story. I just taught my three-year-old how to do an impersonation of Marlon Brando in The Godfather. It's hilarious.

[starsinmyeyes 0]

Preschool aged children playing a word game ....I'm thinking of a B word... you say it when you play hide and seek.....all of them thought for a long time then one child pipes up and says ...'I know...Bound It!' The answer was Boo!

[mrskirk 0]

When my son was about 4 years old, he had been munching on a bunch of grapes. He had eaten them all and walked up to me with nothing but the vine in his hands. He then asked, "Mom, what should I do with these grape bones?"

[Queenie 0]

Martha, a little girl a baby sit ( she is about 4 ), was playing in the back yard with her little friends ( 3 other kids) and they were all huddled in a corner and every now and then I heard a "WOW" from the group...then they all walked up to me, martha in tow, and said " Purple ( nick name they gave me) look at what Martha found!!" Martha came up to me and held out her hands and as she did she said "ITS MAGIC CLAY! I can mold it into anything!" low and behold the child was playing with Cat poop!!! I didnt want to imbarass her so I asked if I could take the magic clay from her and asked her to come inside and wash her hands.. I then told her that she wasnt to play with any more Magic clay or the magic would go away and never come back ( what else could I say to her it was all I could do to keep from laughing at her) :borgqueen:

[Abakai2003 0]

This is a story about my actions when I was young I can only beleve they are true form the amount of people that delight in telling me.

 

I was about 4 or five when my Great Grand farther pass away.

whilest at the wake every one was being very somber as I not knowing what was going on was running around and screaming and having a great time. My mum grabbed my and said "You have to be a good boy and not make any noise" I said "why? and my mum said "because your grandad has died" To which I smiled and said in a rather loud voice "that ok then if he's dead he can't hear me, he won't mind"

[mj 7]

Many years ago I was babysitting my oldest brother's children, and there was a huge Indiana thuderstorm raging. My five (or four) year old niece was terrified, and could not be comforted.

 

I decided to try something that had worked on me years ago. I had been frightened in a thunderstorm and my mom had said to me that a thunderstorm was just God's power. That fascicnated me, and I became curious about T-storms, and would watch them with fascination, because I trusted that God was good, so somehow this had to be alright. I lost all fear.

 

So I told this to my young niece ( she's a beautiful college student now), who quickly replied,

"God!? Well, why doesn't He just stop!!??" It didn't work at all! Her God was just not that loud.

I think I just ended up holding her for a awhile.

 

I still get a smile when I think of this.

[Gotabite 0]

I am reminded of when my son was about 4 years old. We were in his pediatrician's office one day, awaiting our turn to be seen. As we were waiting, a very obese lady came in with her child and walked up to the registration window.....My son looked up at her then back at me and in a loud voice that ever one could hear he said...."Mom, that lady sure is fat!"........Highly embarrassed, I tried to quiet him, which only made matters worse. "But she is fat," he said even louder. The lady looked back at me and my son from the window.....I looked back at her, and could also hear others in the waiting room laughing. I could only say "I'm sorry" to her.....and my son looked back at me puzzled, as if to say "what did I do wrong, I only told the truth?" :(

[Theunicornhunter 2]

Many years ago I taught a class of four year olds at church. Four year olds have a limited attention span so I was trying to get them to review the main point of the lesson at the end of class.

 

I made the comment "I want you to be able to tell your mommies and daddies what you learned in primary today"

 

This little girl looks at me and says "Why, so they'll think you're a good teacher"

 

Well, you know I probably did want that but I certainly learned something that day.

[Madam Captain 0]

I have worked in several child care centres over the last five years so I am constantly hearing children say funny things. The funniest thing I heard was not actually at work but something my nephew told me when he was about three years old.

 

I was babysitting my nephews one night, the younger boy had already gone to bed but the oldest one stayed up a bit longer. I can't remember what we were talking about but he just casually came out with this:

 

"Um, Aunty Linda, you've got bosoms like my Mum"

 

I couldn't keep a straight face and I burst out laughing. He laughed along with me. Later I told my sister (his mum) about what he said and she laughed too.

 

I remember another time when my Mum and I were at my sister's house, kicking a soccer ball around the back yard with my nephews (the same boys). My oldest nephew said quite seriously, "I'm going to be a fireman when I grow up. I'm going to live in the country with all the firetrucks"

 

My Mum and I looked at each other, trying to keep a straight face but we couldn't help it and had a good laugh.

 

The same nephew had trouble saying 'truck' when he was younger. He used to say 'fruck' instead.

 

Children do come out with some classic sayings. I have heard many priceless conversations between children too.

 

Madam Captain out!!

[Madam Captain 0]

This is a story about my actions when I was young I can only beleve they are true form the amount of people that delight in telling me.

 

I was about 4 or five when my  Great Grand farther pass away.

whilest at the wake every one was being very somber as I not knowing what was going on was running around and screaming and having a great time.  My mum grabbed my and said "You have to be a good boy and not make any noise" I said "why? and my mum said "because your grandad has died" To which I smiled and said in a rather loud voice "that ok then if he's dead he can't hear me, he won't mind"

Now that is just priceless!! I had a good laugh when I read your post. My Dad likes to embarress me with this story:

 

When I was about six years old, my parents took me and my older brother and sister on a long holiday around Australia. When we were in Queensland, we went on a scenic train ride (along with some other friends of my parents) that went through the rainforest, there were waterfalls along the way and lots of tunnels. Each time we went through a tunnel, I screamed because I had never been on a train before so I had never been through a tunnel. As I was only young at the time, I thought my fear was quite understandable. My Dad just thought it was amusing. Anyway, getting back to the funny part of the story, on the train, we were sitting opposite some people from Indonesia (or Malaysia, I'm not really sure). In my loudest voice possible I said:

 

"Dad, that man over there looks like a monkey!!"

 

Of course, everyone on the train heard me and my parents were absolutely mortified. I can't even remember saying it but how embarressment!!!

 

Madam Captain out!!

[Madam Captain 0]

I am reminded of when my son was about 4 years old.  We were in his pediatrician's office one day, awaiting our turn to be seen.  As we were waiting, a very obese lady came in with her child and walked up to the  registration window.....My son looked up at her then back at me and in a loud voice that ever one could hear he said...."Mom, that lady sure is fat!"........Highly embarrassed, I tried to quiet him, which only made matters worse.  "But she is fat," he said even louder.  The lady looked back at me and my son from the window.....I looked back at her, and could also hear others in the waiting room laughing.  I could only say  "I'm sorry" to her.....and my son looked back at me puzzled, as if to say "what did I do wrong, I only told the truth?" :(

I have a similar story that happened to my Mum's goddaughter.

 

My Mum's goddaughter, Leonie, was waiting in line at the bank with her son, John, who was about five years old at the time. There was another lady standing in front of them, who clearly had a problem with body odour. John said rather loudly: "Mum, that lady really stinks!!' Leonie told John not to talk quite so loudly and he said "But she does stink Mum". By this stage, the woman, who had obviously heard him, turned around with a very angry expression on her face. Leonie thought this woman was going to hit her. Needless to say, she did her banking as quick as she could that day!!

 

Madam Captain out!!

[Madam Captain 0]

Martha, a little girl a baby sit ( she is about 4 ), was playing in the back yard with her little friends ( 3 other kids) and they were all huddled in a corner  and every now and then I heard a "WOW" from the group...then they all walked up to me, martha in tow, and said " Purple ( nick name they gave me) look at what Martha found!!" Martha came up to me and held out her hands and as she did she said "ITS MAGIC CLAY! I can mold it into anything!" low and behold the child was playing with Cat poop!!! I didnt want to imbarass her so I asked if I could take the magic clay from her and asked her to come inside and wash her hands.. I then told her that she wasnt to play with any more Magic clay or the magic would go away and never come back ( what else could I say to her it was all I could do to keep from laughing at her) :borgqueen:

That was quick thinking!!! Its a good idea to be creative when talking to children about situations like the one you mentioned. I remember a similar situation (nothing to do with cat poop) but it reminded me of your story.

 

A few years ago, my Mum and I went to visit some friends on their yacht. Their son was four years old at the time. While my Mum was talking with his parents, their son, Matthew, asked me if I wanted to see some 'surprises' in his bedroom (which was actually at the end of the yacht, with two beds next to each other, he slept in one bed and his parents slept in the other one). He sat on his parents' bed and I sat next to him. There was a small shell next to the bed and Matthew started taking things off the shelf to show me. First of all, he showed me a few novels, a small packet of tissues and an old toothbrush. He said "These are all surprises. Do you want to see some more surprises?" I said "Okay" wondering what else he would pull off the shelf. Then he handed me a tube of something that I thought was toothpaste. After having a closer look at the writing on the tube, I soon discovered it wasn't toothpaste at all but something associated with two people sleeping together. I quickly put the tube back on the shelf but then he handed me a packet of condoms!! He said "These are all surprises" and I said with a completely straight face "Maybe we should put all these surprises back on the shelf".

 

I had to keep a straight face for the rest of the visit, even when Matthew said to his Mum "I was showing Linda lots of surprises in my room".

 

Madam Captain out!!

[Madam Captain 0]

My older brother came out with a classic when he was about ten. I can't remember this because he is five years older than me but my Mum told me about it. Here goes:

 

My brother was having breakfast one morning and after he poured the milk onto his Weetbix, he started trying to read some of the stuff printed on the milk carton. On one side of the carton it had written: Pasteurised and Homogonised. He sounded out the 'pasteurised' word but then he said:

 

"Mum, what does homogenocide mean?" He was trying to sound out homogonised but came out with 'homogenocide instead!! :(

 

Another time, when my sister was about seven or eight (she is six years older than me - again my Mum told me about this) an Aboriginal family came to visit (I live in Australia). They were friends of my grandfather's and he had met them while working up north in one of the Aboriginal communities up there. This family had two or three children and they needed to have a shower (I think they stayed the night). My sister saw them going into the shower and said to my grandfather:

 

"Poppa, are they going to have a shower to wash the black off?" :(

 

Madam Captain out!!

[Madam Captain 0]

A few years ago, I worked at a child care centre with children aged three to five years. The children bought their own food to the centre for the day. I remember one day, the kids were all having afternoon tea and one little boy, Kemi, had a small container of yoghurt with a screw top lid on it. He also had some fruit which he ate first and he was about to take the lid of his yoghurt when the container fell on the floor. The lid on the container split open and most of the yoghurt spilled onto the floor. I said to Kemi,

 

"We will have to clean that up now"

 

Another child that was sitting nearby looked at Kemi and said:

 

"Yeah, its your problem" :biggrin:

 

Madam Captain out!!

[A l t e r E g o 9]

Tonight before dinner Jem came bursting into the house with eyes big as saucers shouting "Daddy daddy! I just saw a UFO! You gotta come see it!" I jumped up and ran following her to the spot, along the way she worriedly huffed between breaths asking me if I would still believe her if it was gone, I told her of course I would. Then we arrived at the spot and she pointed east exclaiming "There it is!". Sure enough, about 7 miles away and glowing in the evening sky hovered a

 

Click For Spoiler

blimp lit from within.

Edited December 27, 2004 by Alterego