dsbs 0 Posted March 31, 2003 You've all probably heard me mention this site numerous times on this board. It's a ST (and other sifi) humour site, and I find it absolutely hilarious. Basically, people write "five minute" versions of episodes they see on TV, except it's supposed to be funny. Anyone can do one (I did 5 minute Haven for TNG, in fact), and I swear, some of them are absolutely the funniest things I have ever read (ok, that's a bit of an exaggeration ) the address is www.3sygma.com/fiveminute (or just search for it on yahoo, w/e) By the way, no, I am not being paid to advertise this site, lol. I would just like to share the humour with you all. (now off I go to the mall, hehehe.) But seriously, we could all use some laughs. If anyone else has any good humour sites, post away! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Yillara Skye 1 Posted March 31, 2003 I selected the one about Insurrection to try that site out and.....That was hilarious!!! I definately recommend this to anyone who can take a joke about their personal Trek favorites! There seems to be a section for all of the series, so copy dsbs's link, visit the site and ENJOY!! :lol: Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lessa_Soong 0 Posted April 1, 2003 It is a very funny site and DSBS's Fiver is great! Check it out, everyone! :lol: <<<<<<< See, Data went! He loved it! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Yillara Skye 1 Posted April 2, 2003 Well, he knows humor when he reads it!! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
dsbs 0 Posted April 2, 2003 It is a very funny site and DSBS's Fiver is great! Check it out, everyone! :lol: <<<<<<< See, Data went! He loved it! Thanks, lessa :lol: I loved VOY - 5 minute Basics. TNG - First contact and Best of Both Worlds (since the site is down now I can't get any more for references, but there were a few more...) These crack me up everytime, I could literally roll on the floor laughing for some of them. Riker: "How can it move around if it's not intelligent?" (pause) Armus: "That's it! You missed a perfectly good opportunity to insult Riker! I'm so tormenting you now" hehe Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
dsbs 0 Posted April 2, 2003 Here's another site, everyone: http://www.geocities.com/~darsplace/star_t...ault/humor.html It's great too (love the light bulb jokes! Troi: I feel the light bulb's pain!) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Takara_Soong 4 Posted April 2, 2003 I read your 5 min Trek and it was great. I just visited the other site you had the link for and I'm still laughing. I loved the Top 10 t-shirts worn by Enterprise crew. Some of them would be really great to have made up for a convention. :lol: Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
dsbs 0 Posted April 2, 2003 Thanks I thought it was ok to do haven cause it wasn't a great episode, so I thought I couldnt ruin it. Haven't read the t-shirts yet, but I will Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
dsbs 0 Posted April 3, 2003 Here are more good ones (from theh 5 minute site): Riker: Hey! Look, everyone! Captain Picard assimilated the Borg! Wesley: I'm pretty sure it went the other way, sir. Borg: We're Borg. Get assimilated. Resistance sucks. Picard: Somebody needs a new catchphrase. Borg: Like "make it so" is any better. Your distinctiveness will be added to our own. Picard: Was that a marriage proposal? Borg: What? No, you idi-- Picard: Mr. Worf, dispatch a subspace message to Admiral Hansen. Tell him... we have been engaged to the Borg. Captain's Log: The Borg have chased us into a nebula. Those jerks. As far as I'm concerned, the wedding's off. O'Brien: Morning, sirs. I have a great idea for how to beam you down. Riker: Wait a minute. Where's Shelby? O'Brien: She and Data are down there already. Now my idea is to beam you into her uniform, her into Geordi's, Geordi into -- Riker: I don't think so. O'Brien: Spoil all my fun, why don't you. Riker: Is Locutus on board? O'Brien: (over the comm) Aye, sir. But can I please get a medical team? All my bones are broken. Riker: You tried the clothing thing again, didn't you? O'Brien: It's not my fault Worf has no fashion sense! Crusher: Jean-Luc? Are you in there? Locutus: Foolish human. Picard no longer exists. Crusher: Oh, fine. Can I get you a drink? Locutus: Tea, Earl Grey, hot. --Dammit! Picard: Data... snooze. Data: Fascinating. Captain Picard has broken through his programming for the sole purpose of giving me a new word for which to recite synonyms. Snooze: sleep, nap, drowse, take five.... Picard: The snooze button, Data! Just push the damn snooze button! Shelby: (over the comm) They're all asleep over here, sir. Should I try poking them? Riker: No, that's okay. Let's just blow up that giant Microsoft metaphor and be done with it. Wesley: Microsoft? I always thought they were a metaphor for the Japanese. You know, kamikaze missions, cramped spaces.... Troi: You're both reading it completely wrong! They're the Americans, spreading their melting-pot philosophy through overwhelming force. Riker: I don't care if they represent caterpillars, just self-destruct them! Shelby: Aye sir. And one more thing.... Riker: Yes? Shelby: I think they're the supposed to be the evils of technology. Wesley: Japanese! Troi: Americans! Riker: SHUT UP! Alright, no more - I'll ruin it for you Going now, see you all 2morrow! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Yillara Skye 1 Posted April 3, 2003 dsbs....all I have to say is :) :P :( especially the Borg marriage proposal! :) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lessa_Soong 0 Posted April 3, 2003 Yep, very funny! The whole site is a riot. I need to go back and look at some of the others. Night night, dsbs! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
dsbs 0 Posted April 3, 2003 dsbs....all I have to say is :) :) especially the Borg marriage proposal! :P :( I love the marriage proposal. Here's one more, just for fun: (from Encounter @ Farpoint) Captain's Log: Well, here we go on our very first mission ever. We may face many dangers, but I'm confident that my baldness will see us through. Picard: Any thoughts on the upcoming mission, folks? Troi: None of my own, but I can tell you yours. Data: I'm not much of a thinker at this point. But if you need any synonyms, I'm your man. Yar: I don't waste time thinking. Life is short. Really, really short. Worf: No thoughts! Only violence! Picard: It seems I've found myself on the voyage of the damned. ok, a few more (these are all from that ep) Yar: The battle section is now ready for battle. Picard: Okay, this is where we surrender. Yar: You're not doing much to fight stereotypes about the French, sir. Picard: We shouldn't be on the same ship. I'd be a constant reminder to you of how I killed your husband. Er, watched him die. Crusher: Look, you take any job you can get with a silly name like Crusher. Picard: You've got nothing on Gates McFadden. Wesley: Wow, the bridge is so cool! Can I fly the ship? Pleeeeease? Picard: What the--! Who is responsible for this atrocity? Crusher: Um.... Picard: You! Beverly, I don't care if it takes me a year -- I'm getting you off this ship! Picard: There's a ship approaching. Do you know something about this? Zorn: (over the comm) No. Nothing at all. Picard: It's firing on your city. Zorn: Honest, I have no idea why that might be. Picard: The firing pattern is Morse code for "I have come to kill you for what you did, Zorn." Zorn: Lalalalalala, I can't hear you.... Picard: Looks like we may have to fire on that ship. Q: Barbarians! Picard: Will you go away? Q: Don't worry, I won't interfere. I'll just stand over here and shout "Barbarians!" every few minutes. Troi: I'm sensing satisfaction from the alien ship. Picard: We can't allow that. Get an away team over there. Alright, I'm done...got a little carried away there. GO TO THE SITE, lol. night lessa Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Yillara Skye 1 Posted April 3, 2003 Great ones dsbs!! I gotta get ready to go for the night too! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
