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should i be good or bad?   18 members have voted

  1. 1. should i be good or bad?

    • Good
      16
    • Bad
      2

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32 posts in this topic

All my life i was a nice guy i treated everyone with repect, then a girl hurt me and i turned bad, then it was girls all around, i then found one i liked alot, i had heard that bad boys attract women, but a nice guy keeps a women, so i gradually turned nice, and now i'm single, i'm so confused.

 

Click for Spoiler:

Why nice guys suck

Nice guys are ugly! They haven't the air of sensuality about them that bad guys do, because they just haven't had lives.

 

Nice guys think women are a 'special species' from another planet.

 

Nice guys suffocate their girlfriends, expecting them to be their lovers, mother, sister, princess, china doll, and the Goddess who brings up the sun in their mornings. They also expect their girlfriends to be their best buddy, because 'real' guys won't have anything to do with the geeks!

 

Nice guys sit there entranced by their girlfriends as the girlfriend carries on the whole conversation by themselves. Nice guys haven't lived so they have nothing to add to the conversation. Nice guys bore women to death.

 

Nice guys stare at their girlfriends in total worship awe. Women find it difficult to eat when they are being visually consumed by a staring, mindless dope.

 

Nice guys quickly look at you when they do a social blunder (such as fart) to see if you caught it. Who cares!

 

Nice guys pretend to be 'just our friend' and then go home and fantasize about us mothering their 'nice guy' kids.

 

Nice guys have no real life or interest of their own. They sit around and dream of getting a girlfriend to fill their empty lives.

 

Nice guys feel so undeserving of 'awesome you' that they make you feel that you have, most assuredly, picked a real loser.

 

Nice guys think women are porcelain goddesses. Women don't want to have to keep living up to a surreal image. If you belch in front of us we won't break!

 

Nice guys think that if a woman doesn't want to have anything to do with their boring, empty shell of manlihood, they're stupid (I'm trying to say a bad word but can't)es who would rather be with a jerk that beats them. Yep, this is every woman's dream.

 

Nice guys are too STUPID to figure out that woman don't want to be the leader on the dance floor.

 

Nice guys wear tucked in golf shirts and make a clean, straight part in their hair, exactly two-inches above their left ear. This really turns woman on. So sexy! Why can't Fabio and Brad Pitt take fashion and grooming lessons from nice guys?

 

Nice guys sit there like passive puppies, waiting for their girl to make all the moves. This is because woman love to feel undesirable.

 

Nice guys can fool our parents. They are often quoted by the respected elder as being kind, loving, committed. Translation: Gay

 

Nice guys suck because you can't complain about them to your friends.

 

Dating a nice guy is like dating yourself. If you like Broccoli, he likes Broccoli. If you hate Jay Leno, he hates Jay Leno. If you order a Shirley Temple, he orders a Shirley Temple. If you are pro capital punishment, he is pro capital punishment. If you think Austin Powers was disgusting he thinks Austin Powers was disgusting. If you prefer Kotex over Tampax...

 

Nice guys eventually turn into jerks too, so why not just date a jerk right from the start and skip all that insecurity stage?

 

Nice guys laugh at your jokes...before you've even reached the punchline.

 

Nice guys quickly get emotionally attached. Sucking the life of you.

 

Nice guys eagerly show affection. Who can appreciate that of which they didn't have to work for?

 

Nice guys are gentle, tender, pedal-soft lovers. Woman love this...hopefully her nice guy will wake her up to let her know that he is coming. "I'm not hurting you now, am I hon.?"

 

Nice guys will never, ever eagerly lust and devour your hot, throbbing body or steamy, sweetened inner core. Nice guys can't hear your body screaming, "hold me, touch me, RAVISH me! (I'm trying to say a bad word but can't) ME NOW!!!"

 

Hopefully, your nice guy will eventually turn into a jerk and cheat on you (so someone else can endure his lack of lovemaking skills).

 

Nice guys will make you feel guilty if you spend a minute anywhere but with them.

 

Nice guys will buy you flowers. Then ask you all evening long if you liked them.

 

Nice guys will never actually tell their girlfriends when they don't like what she's doing. Instead, he will get mad about it six months later.

 

Nice guys are hideously insecure. Nice guys never do for you anything for the simple sake of giving. Everything they do for their girlfriends are like stock investments. The stock is up at Acceptance and Approval. Each gift he gives you, or loving gesture he shows you, is really a guaranteed down payment toward a future of him clinging to you like a drowning man to a life-saver.

 

Nice guys are confused about romance. They either go overboard and bring a dozen roses to a "lets go for a walk in the park" date...or...they are so unsuave and unsure of themselves that they hang around you, pretending to be your friend. Yep, I just love an unconfident, self-doubting man.

 

Nice guys are so desperate to please that they have no identity of their own. Ask a nice guy his thoughts on anything. Guess what? He doesn't have any!

 

Nice guys are easily used. I just love a man I have no respect for.

 

Nice guys suffer from the "Night in Shining Armor" syndrome. They pick out the sleaziest, "hard luck" cases to rescue. Moral of the story? Wear condoms while sleeping thru the sex act with your nice guy.

 

Nice guys are so eager to please that they rarely speak up when something bothers them. Thus, they can make their girlfriends feel guilty when they say, "Everything I did, I did for you".

 

Nice guys truly think that they are making their girlfriends happy by sacrificing their own life, desires, wants, needs, opinions, and identities to that of their girlfriends. They can then claim that "no one will ever love you as much as I do". Translation: "You are such a (I'm trying to say a bad word but can't), be grateful I'm willing to put up with you and love you anyway."

 

Nice guys make you their Life, their only source of happiness. Woman love this burden placed on them.

 

Nice Guys really don't like themselves. Insecurity is not sexy, it is suffocating, clinging and obsessive. Issues with nice men are unbearable. Issues with jerks are workable.

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You need to be the kind of person you can look at straight in the eye in the mirror.

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Just be yourself and eventually you'll attract a woman who loves who you are not what you're trying to be.

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Just be yourself and eventually you'll attract a woman who loves who you are not what you're trying to be.

Ah, good advice :eek:

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You need to be the kind of person you can look at straight in the eye in the mirror.

That's just it, i can live with either, i knew i shouldnt have sold my soul for a can of coke on that hot summer 98

 

Alterego, i don't know who i am anymore.

 

btw i'd like to apologise to Alterego and the others who warned me about my ex, and thank all those who offered support.

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Alterego, i don't know who i am anymore.

 

Try to remember. Who you are is in your memory, listen to yourself and you'll find you again. Did you keep any journals when you were younger, who you were may be in them awaiting re-discovery. Old friends you've lost touch with could help you. Ask mom!

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Alterego, i don't know who i am anymore.

 

Try to remember. Who you are is in your memory, listen to yourself and you'll find you again. Did you keep any journals when you were younger, who you were may be in them awaiting re-discovery. Old friends you've lost touch with could help you. Ask mom!

I didn't write about my life, i wish i had.

The only friends i have now are the ones from before i met my ex.

My mum isn't alot of help, it's all 'i told you so' and 'you can do better'

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Well then that leaves you and your memory to sort it out. Perhaps trying to find out who you are/were isn't necessary, just be the best you you can be and the rest will fall into place. Come to think of it the only thing I know of who I am is by what I say and do everyday, I'm not always perfect but I am always me; whoever that is.

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Alterego, i don't know who i am anymore.

 

Try to remember. Who you are is in your memory, listen to yourself and you'll find you again. Did you keep any journals when you were younger, who you were may be in them awaiting re-discovery. Old friends you've lost touch with could help you. Ask mom!

I didn't write about my life, i wish i had.

The only friends i have now are the ones from before i met my ex.

My mum isn't alot of help, it's all 'i told you so' and 'you can do better'

Try finding some old toys, old favorite pictures, books. Try and remember how you felt playing or reading or looking.

 

I voted for good, but it's not the ultimate answer. Just take a breather and figure out what you think and want and believe. Eventually there will be someone who understands you. When they come along, try and acept them for who they are and don't smother them. Just make them feel wanted and they'll do the same for you.

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Alterego, i don't know who i am anymore.

 

Try to remember. Who you are is in your memory, listen to yourself and you'll find you again. Did you keep any journals when you were younger, who you were may be in them awaiting re-discovery. Old friends you've lost touch with could help you. Ask mom!

I didn't write about my life, i wish i had.

The only friends i have now are the ones from before i met my ex.

My mum isn't alot of help, it's all 'i told you so' and 'you can do better'

Try finding some old toys, old favorite pictures, books. Try and remember how you felt playing or reading or looking.

 

I voted for good, but it's not the ultimate answer. Just take a breather and figure out what you think and want and believe. Eventually there will be someone who understands you. When they come along, try and acept them for who they are and don't smother them. Just make them feel wanted and they'll do the same for you.

Some sound advice, theres only 3 people in this world that truly understand me though, my mum, and my oldest friends Jared and Laura.

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Some sound advice, theres only 3 people in this world that truly understand me though, my mum, and my oldest friends Jared and Laura.

Just talk to them. Ask funny questions, like what you were like as a child. Stange things you did, games you liked to play books you liked to read. Just follow your life from beginning to now, figure yourself out. Then start trying to answer questions about youself.

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OH MY! My head is spinning from all that. No wonder you can't figure out who you, that would mess anyone up. :eek: Tell you what. My best advice would be to delete all that and start over. That sounds like a total bunch of bull to me. Who told you all this anyway? I never heard such crap. Just dump in. Open up one of your plasma vents and just let it go and start over. In time you'll forget about this ex of yours. But that's alot to digest my friend and none of it is good.

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Some sound advice, theres only 3 people in this world that truly understand me though, my mum, and my oldest friends Jared and Laura.

Just talk to them. Ask funny questions, like what you were like as a child. Stange things you did, games you liked to play books you liked to read. Just follow your life from beginning to now, figure yourself out. Then start trying to answer questions about youself.

Good idea.

 

Jeanway, i got that from one of LOTB's topics.

 

It's hard to forget a full and important year of my life.

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No offense to anyone, but that spoiler list (e-mail forward?) was such a crock. :eek: If I may say so, not many of the arrogant, self-centered guys have marriages that last more than 5 years. Sounds like a real formula for success to me. :eek:

 

Adam: Be who you are; don't let those terms define you. Probably no one is 100% one way or the other anyway. You don't have to have a girlfriend all the time. If you take the time to figure out who you are, without looking to a girlfriend for definition, you're alot more likely to find someone who appreciates you for your true-self rather than some image you may try to project.

 

I'm here if you want to chat, old pal.

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No offense to anyone, but that spoiler list (e-mail forward?) was such a crock. :eek:  If I may say so, not many of the arrogant, self-centered guys have marriages that last more than 5 years. Sounds like a real formula for success to me. :eek:

 

Adam: Be who you are; don't let those terms define you. Probably no one is 100% one way or the other anyway. You don't have to have a girlfriend all the time. If you take the time to figure out who you are, without looking to a girlfriend for definition, you're alot more likely to find someone who appreciates you for your true-self rather than some image you may try to project.

 

I'm here if you want to chat, old pal.

Thanks old friend that meant alot to me.

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It occured to me last night after I read this that guys actually say this kind of stuff looking for 'Pity' :eek: Your not pitiful!!!! :eek:

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All my life i was a nice guy i treated everyone with repect, then a girl hurt me and i turned bad, then it was girls all around, i then found one i liked alot, i had heard that bad boys attract women, but a nice guy keeps a women, so i gradually turned nice, and now i'm single, i'm so confused.

 

Click for Spoiler:

Why nice guys suck

Nice guys are ugly! They haven't the air of sensuality about them that bad guys do, because they just haven't had lives.

 

Nice guys think women are a 'special species' from another planet.

 

Nice guys suffocate their girlfriends, expecting them to be their lovers, mother, sister, princess, china doll, and the Goddess who brings up the sun in their mornings. They also expect their girlfriends to be their best buddy, because 'real' guys won't have anything to do with the geeks!

 

Nice guys sit there entranced by their girlfriends as the girlfriend carries on the whole conversation by themselves. Nice guys haven't lived so they have nothing to add to the conversation. Nice guys bore women to death.

 

Nice guys stare at their girlfriends in total worship awe. Women find it difficult to eat when they are being visually consumed by a staring, mindless dope.

 

Nice guys quickly look at you when they do a social blunder (such as fart) to see if you caught it. Who cares!

 

Nice guys pretend to be 'just our friend' and then go home and fantasize about us mothering their 'nice guy' kids.

 

Nice guys have no real life or interest of their own. They sit around and dream of getting a girlfriend to fill their empty lives.

 

Nice guys feel so undeserving of 'awesome you' that they make you feel that you have, most assuredly, picked a real loser.

 

Nice guys think women are porcelain goddesses. Women don't want to have to keep living up to a surreal image. If you belch in front of us we won't break!

 

Nice guys think that if a woman doesn't want to have anything to do with their boring, empty shell of manlihood, they're stupid (I'm trying to say a bad word but can't)es who would rather be with a jerk that beats them. Yep, this is every woman's dream.

 

Nice guys are too STUPID to figure out that woman don't want to be the leader on the dance floor.

 

Nice guys wear tucked in golf shirts and make a clean, straight part in their hair, exactly two-inches above their left ear. This really turns woman on. So sexy! Why can't Fabio and Brad Pitt take fashion and grooming lessons from nice guys?

 

Nice guys sit there like passive puppies, waiting for their girl to make all the moves. This is because woman love to feel undesirable.

 

Nice guys can fool our parents. They are often quoted by the respected elder as being kind, loving, committed. Translation: Gay

 

Nice guys suck because you can't complain about them to your friends.

 

Dating a nice guy is like dating yourself. If you like Broccoli, he likes Broccoli. If you hate Jay Leno, he hates Jay Leno. If you order a Shirley Temple, he orders a Shirley Temple. If you are pro capital punishment, he is pro capital punishment. If you think Austin Powers was disgusting he thinks Austin Powers was disgusting. If you prefer Kotex over Tampax...

 

Nice guys eventually turn into jerks too, so why not just date a jerk right from the start and skip all that insecurity stage?

 

Nice guys laugh at your jokes...before you've even reached the punchline.

 

Nice guys quickly get emotionally attached. Sucking the life of you.

 

Nice guys eagerly show affection. Who can appreciate that of which they didn't have to work for?

 

Nice guys are gentle, tender, pedal-soft lovers. Woman love this...hopefully her nice guy will wake her up to let her know that he is coming. "I'm not hurting you now, am I hon.?"

 

Nice guys will never, ever eagerly lust and devour your hot, throbbing body or steamy, sweetened inner core. Nice guys can't hear your body screaming, "hold me, touch me, RAVISH me! (I'm trying to say a bad word but can't) ME NOW!!!"

 

Hopefully, your nice guy will eventually turn into a jerk and cheat on you (so someone else can endure his lack of lovemaking skills).

 

Nice guys will make you feel guilty if you spend a minute anywhere but with them.

 

Nice guys will buy you flowers. Then ask you all evening long if you liked them.

 

Nice guys will never actually tell their girlfriends when they don't like what she's doing. Instead, he will get mad about it six months later.

 

Nice guys are hideously insecure. Nice guys never do for you anything for the simple sake of giving. Everything they do for their girlfriends are like stock investments. The stock is up at Acceptance and Approval. Each gift he gives you, or loving gesture he shows you, is really a guaranteed down payment toward a future of him clinging to you like a drowning man to a life-saver.

 

Nice guys are confused about romance. They either go overboard and bring a dozen roses to a "lets go for a walk in the park" date...or...they are so unsuave and unsure of themselves that they hang around you, pretending to be your friend. Yep, I just love an unconfident, self-doubting man.

 

Nice guys are so desperate to please that they have no identity of their own. Ask a nice guy his thoughts on anything. Guess what? He doesn't have any!

 

Nice guys are easily used. I just love a man I have no respect for.

 

Nice guys suffer from the "Night in Shining Armor" syndrome. They pick out the sleaziest, "hard luck" cases to rescue. Moral of the story? Wear condoms while sleeping thru the sex act with your nice guy.

 

Nice guys are so eager to please that they rarely speak up when something bothers them. Thus, they can make their girlfriends feel guilty when they say, "Everything I did, I did for you".

 

Nice guys truly think that they are making their girlfriends happy by sacrificing their own life, desires, wants, needs, opinions, and identities to that of their girlfriends. They can then claim that "no one will ever love you as much as I do". Translation: "You are such a (I'm trying to say a bad word but can't), be grateful I'm willing to put up with you and love you anyway."

 

Nice guys make you their Life, their only source of happiness. Woman love this burden placed on them.

 

Nice Guys really don't like themselves. Insecurity is not sexy, it is suffocating, clinging and obsessive. Issues with nice men are unbearable. Issues with jerks are workable.

Same thing happened to me Arms and it sucks,if i was you i would just be yourself i like being a nice guy oki i like to play the bad boy as well cause it does attract some girls but thats more because they think you are confident in yourself not because your bad,i really know what your going through Arms i have been there..good luck man.

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I voted be bad. But if you do, be prepared to lose someone yet again when you revert to your usual, nice self and discover you aren't who your were pretending to be. By the way, that thing you posted about nice guys is true for some women/girls, but not all. I wouldn't bother being too nice at the beginning - it doesn't really make much difference as far as I can tell since most women will doubt your intentions if they have any sense (unless they're quite young and still naive).

 

Do whatever you want and stop worrying about what they want. Your "niceness" won't be appreciated until you really get to know one another. From what I've seen, some girls (I'm not saying all) who pick up on this early in a relationship will use it to manipulate you.

 

It may sound Machiavellian but how people perceive you is just as important as how you really are and you can never control that as it's affected by their own shortcomings and messed-up experiences.

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Thanks, Bysty, Hangon and Red Shirt.

 

Jeanway why try to make me feel bad?

 

I think i'll try the good confident guy for a while...

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I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just made a comment about what some guys do, that's all. They crawl up on the 'Pity Pot' and won't get of it. Oh, I think there is also a term for what they are after too, but I can't say it. :eek::eek: I'm sure that's NOT what this is about, right?

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I'll take a good guy over a bad guy who talks about himself or a bad guy in general any day.

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Hey just remember this, nice guys finish last.

 

We are the Kings, were the ones who get the hapiness in the end.

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I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just made a comment about what some guys do, that's all. They crawl up on the 'Pity Pot' and won't get of it. Oh, I think there is also a term for what they are after too, but I can't say it. :eek:  :eek: I'm sure that's NOT what this is about, right?

 

You say that is if sitting on the pity pot is exclusive to males around here but I got news for you; the gals pity posts out-number the guys by at least 5:1 (probably by more) AND the gals don't limit their pity pleas to one particular post they create about their problem; they spread it around to other forums. :o

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i don't pity post, i just say what i am thinking and feeling.

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I voted be good, but I have no advice to give, because I have very little insight into the area of relationships. Oh, but lack of experience never stopped anyone from chipping in their two cents worth, now did it?

 

Shakespeare had some advice on being yourself. Paraphrasing, to thine own self be true, and it shall follow as night follows day that you will then be false to no man.

 

I have learned who I am, and I stick with it, through all the many disappointments in my life. It allows peace of mind to dominate my life, no matter what is straifing my life at the moment.

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I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just made a comment about what some guys do, that's all. They crawl up on the 'Pity Pot' and won't get of it. Oh, I think there is also a term for what they are after too, but I can't say it. :tear:  :eek: I'm sure that's NOT what this is about, right?

 

You say that is if sitting on the pity pot is exclusive to males around here but I got news for you; the gals pity posts out-number the guys by at least 5:1 (probably by more) AND the gals don't limit their pity pleas to one particular post they create about their problem; they spread it around to other forums. :eek:

AMEN TO THAT :o :eek:

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Stay good unless you can really handle being a bad guy. My husband when I met him drove a motorcycle, and had a bit of a reputation of being wild and in a way that excited me. :eek: When he decided he wanted me as a wife he sold the motorcycle, took a job, started going to church, and went the proper route of asking my father for me. My Dad was neat about it, afterall my husband was divorced and on my Dad's side they're all Catholics. Dad didn't object. My mother had a fit and demanded I have nothing to do with Daniel. I ran off and married him a week later. So the bad guy attracted me but the good guy he is now got me and kept me. :eek:

Edited by BlueCrystal

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i don't pity post, i just say what i am thinking and feeling.

 

 

 

I'm sorry A. But sometimes it's better to keep private things private, like in a PM or IM. Unless it's a happy thing then you can go to Party Loco with it. We all have troubles A, I'll be happy to talk with you anytime. :eek:

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