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Rivendells_king

Why do most parents complain about what you do?

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Ok this week has been horrible (thanks to my loser parents) Ok Thursday my mom was naging at me because I dont leave the house that often and when I do its only for track or to go to the grocery store. So this morning me and one of my senior class ferinds decided to go to quiznos (just opened in the area I live in) So I ask my mom if I can go and I told her that he would give me a ride home and than I get this response

 

You fat but (other word) your always gone! How about for once you keep your fu__en little fat but home and just shut up.

 

I talked to my ferinds and they say this happens all the time but parents tell me why do you do this?

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Okay I'm a parent of a 19 yr old son, what do you want to know exactly...

 

are you confused because your mom can't seem to make up her mind

about you not going out enough or too much?

 

or is it the swearing? or both?

 

 

 

P.S

 

I really am trying to understand what you're asking...I read your thread 3x

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If you're a senior in high school you should be thinking about getting out of your Mom's house really soon. Try to tune out her nagging and think about how much fun it will be to ignore her for the rest of your life.

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If you're a senior in high school you should be thinking about getting out of your Mom's house really soon.  Try to tune out her nagging and think about how much fun it will be to ignore her for the rest of your life.

Yeah, sounds harsh but as soon as I turned 18 I split and didn't look back. Sometimes you really don't have a choice.

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Ok this week has been horrible (thanks to my loser parents) Ok Thursday my mom was naging at me because I dont leave the house that often and when I do its only for track or to go to the grocery store.

This is understandable.

 

So this morning me and one of my senior class ferinds decided to go to quiznos (just opened in the area I live in) So I ask my mom if I can go and I told her that he would give me a ride home and than I get this response

 

You fat but (other word) your always gone! How about for once you keep your fu__en little fat but home and just shut up.

That is really cruel for any parent to say. What prompted this? Is your mom usually nice? I don't have enough information.

 

I talked to my ferinds and they say this happens all the time but parents tell me why do you do this?

My parents were always consistant with me, they never changed their mind on a whim.

Edited by Captain Jean-Luc Picard

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:flex: Wow, my parents were never like that and sure will not be like that with my kids. I don't even know what to say. :)

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Ya know, it isn't easy being a parent. I have two daughters, ages 20 and 16. When you have kids you worry about everything. You want to protect them from certain things, but you don't want to be over-protective. You want them to go out and have fun, but you don't want them to get involved in the wrong things. You want them to be responsible, but you don't want them to be burdened down with too much responsibility to the point that they can't just 'be a kid.'

 

I think your parents are feeling just as much pressure to be a good parent as you are feeling about the various aspects of your life. Leaving at 18 and never looking back probably isn't a really good choice. Try to put yourself in your parent's shoes. They want you to be the best possible person you can be, they love you and want you around, but they don't want to hold you back. So they encourage you to go out and build a life, but sometimes they get scared that the time they have with you is short and want you to stay home. Of course this seems contradictory to you, and it is. But try to look at it from their point of view. While I don't condone the language your Mom used, I think it was out of frustration more than anything else. And of course, I don't know what else was going on in her life at that particular time that might have caused her to over-react.

 

If you do leave at 18, make sure you are ready emotionally and financially. Don't do it just to escape your parents, you might very well need them for something in the future.

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I was out of the house before I turned 18, but I had to attend mom's funeral after Boot Camp. trust me, Voric, Parents seem harsh, but they really do want to help you. just try and shut out as much negative as you can.

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If you're a senior in high school you should be thinking about getting out of your Mom's house really soon.  Try to tune out her nagging and think about how much fun it will be to ignore her for the rest of your life.

(I think) he is only a sophmore in high school.

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My mother has a minor hostility towards me because I'm more successful than she is.

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My parents iritate me quite a bit at times, in fact recently i threatened to kill myself because i was just getting sick and tired of the same old crap (didn't even come close, btw). But if it's bothering you to the point you're thinking that same way, get out as soon as you can.

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My mom had a really foul mouth and told me off often when I was high school age. It never seemed I could do anything right. I moved out after high school, but was lucky I stayed on decent terms with her. When I was 19 and had pneumonia, she insisted I come home and she cared for me until i was all better again. About three months later, I moved back home and things were fine.

 

I know firsthand how hard it is for your mom to call you things like fatas* out of anger. I was always the "lazy little sh1t" during my teen years.

 

Maybe you should try to talk to her directly about things when she's in a calm mood. It will probably help clarify why she's angry with you. Also, I recommend that you try to hold your temper if she does yell at you like that again. If you lose your cool and curse back, you'll only be making things worse.

 

Trust me, you may not see eye to eye right now, but there'll come a time when you need her and you'll wish you hadn't burned your bridges.

 

Not that I'm justifying calling a teenager nasty names, but just relating my own experience in a similar situation. My mom has been gone 6 years now and I'm glad I never cut off our relationship even though she could get ugly when she was mad.

 

Best of luck to you!

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I don't know if I can give you any advice on this since I've never been in the situations that have been described. Mom and I are really good friends and I respect her more than anyone else I know. No one is the perfect parent, but there are some pretty bad home environments that can't be excused. Without knowing exactly what goes on in your house, all I can do is send a prayer your way my friend. :flex:

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Ya know, it isn't easy being a parent.  I have two daughters, ages 20 and 16.  When you have kids you worry about everything.  You want to protect them from certain things, but you don't want to be over-protective.  You want them to go out and have fun, but you don't want them to get involved in the wrong things.  You want them to be responsible, but you don't want them to be burdened down with too much responsibility to the point that they can't just 'be a kid.'

 

I think your parents are feeling just as much pressure to be a good parent as you are feeling about the various aspects of your life.  Leaving at 18 and never looking back probably isn't a really good choice.  Try to put yourself in your parent's shoes.  They want you to be the best possible person you can be, they love you and want you around, but they don't want to hold you back.  So they encourage you to go out and build a life, but sometimes they get scared that the time they have with you is short and want you to stay home.  Of course this seems contradictory to you, and it is.  But try to look at it from their point of view.  While I don't condone the language your Mom used, I think it was out of frustration more than anything else.  And of course, I don't know what else was going on in her life at that particular time that might have caused her to over-react.

 

If you do leave at 18, make sure you are ready emotionally and financially.  Don't do it just to escape your parents, you might very well need them for something in the future.

Well I have to disagree. If he is telling the truth his mom is a psycho. Not only is she being inconsistent, and rude, but is apparently not thinking rational either - and certainly isn't a good role model to emulate.

 

Voric's mom complains he leaves the house only for track? Heck, do you know how many parents wish their kids would leave the house that often? For that matter, isn't track one of the things parents WANT their kids to leave the house for? There are plenty of worse things for a teenager to get in to.

 

Then she complains he wants to leave with his friends to go to Quiznos? Again, there are plenty of junk foods and his mom is complaining about sandwiches? It may not be the healthiest food, but there are plenty of worse things out there to eat.

 

And don't give me that she is worried about his health. How many "fat asses" make the track team? Not too many.

 

Voric, I don't know you very well, but I would advise getting out of that situation as soon as practical.

 

I left home when I was 18, which my parents said was a bad idea. When I got out of the Army, which again according to them was a bad idea, I moved back in with my mom for a couple months while I started college - and would you believe they even thought college was a bad idea? - got myself situated, and moved out again. Times were tough sometimes but I survived.

 

Now I make more than both of them combined.

Edited by lt_van_roy

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My mom had a really foul mouth and told me off often when I was high school age. It never seemed I could do anything right. I moved out after high school, but was lucky I stayed on decent terms with her. When I was 19 and had pneumonia, she insisted I come home and she cared for me until i was all better again. About three months later, I moved back home and things were fine.

 

I know firsthand how hard it is for your mom to call you things like fatas* out of anger. I was always the "lazy little sh1t" during my teen years.

 

Maybe you should try to talk to her directly about things when she's in a calm mood. It will probably help clarify why she's angry with you. Also, I recommend that you try to hold your temper if she does yell at you like that again. If you lose your cool and curse back, you'll only be making things worse.

 

Trust me, you may not see eye to eye right now, but there'll come a time when you need her and you'll wish you hadn't burned your bridges.

 

Not that I'm justifying calling a teenager nasty names, but just relating my own experience in a similar situation. My mom has been gone 6 years now and I'm glad I never cut off our relationship even though she could get ugly when she was mad.

 

Best of luck to you!

I am glad you worked things out with your mother! One of the hardest things to deal with is your parents' imperfections, but maintaining a relationship is the best solution. I think this post is very good advice.

 

Forgiveness goes a long way. When we forgive, it is for something very real and very wrong that has been done to us. It liberates us from re-living the wrong over and over and over again. And there will be times when we need others to forgive us.

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She hates me going on the net too much. You must take all honors and ap classes.... Etc. I hate Chinese parents... Yea practice an hour of piano and violin one each...

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She hates me going on the net too much. You must take all honors and ap classes.... Etc. I hate Chinese parents... Yea practice an hour of piano and violin one each...

:laugh: hehe. I honestly think you'll thank them one day. I only went into college with a few transferable( :P ) credits, and didn't keep up with any of my music lessons (drums, etc...). I wish I'd have done more now.

 

I just ask that everyone advising RK to "get out soon" realize that we don't know all the circumstances of the situation. You may be abolutely right, but you're also going off of limited info.

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yeah no offense to your mom but shes very outa line there in my opinion, just live with it try not to rebel or get into too many bad things, itll hurt u in the long run, try to live with it, find a safe outlet if it gets too much enjoy life eat cheese and remember in a few years youll be out of there

don't want to be over-protective. You want them to go out and have fun, but you don't want them to get involved in the wrong things. You want them to be responsible, but you don't want them to be burdened down with too much responsibility to the point that they can't just 'be a kid.'

the truth is, teens will do what they want, no parents are perfect because the success of the parent is measured in the child, and i know alot of parents that are great but their kids are far from (drugs and such) i personally dont do em, i guess the best atmosphere is that your child can and will tell you anyhting, and doesnt feel pressured to

She hates me going on the net too much. You must take all honors and ap classes.... Etc. I hate Chinese parents... Yea practice an hour of piano and violin one each...

yeah no offense anyone but quite a few of my friends are like asian and oriental, and they are much stricter my friend had like a 78 or something when he gets low 90s high 80s most of the time and he was saying how his dad is gonna yell at him wen he got home some parents put alot of pressure on their kids, i live with my dad and he doesnt put much pressure on me at all (cause he was raised that way) i was over at my friend's house till 2 yesterday (i dont have a cerfew) as long as im not robbing or killing anyone/thing, i go to skool and keep my grades decent hes fine :laugh:

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Wow! I feel a lot better about my parents now. They get on my nerves all the time, but they've never called me names before. The big thing that irritates me is when they tell me not to do something and then turn around and do it themselves. :laugh:

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