April Fools Day

[Mike 5]

From Star Trek.com

 

It took the U.S.S. Voyager and her crew seven years to return home from the Delta Quadrant, seven long years of frustrating plans and attempts to bridge the distance between where the Caretaker whisked the ship and the crew's home in the Alpha Quadrant. There has been great speculation that the journey may have been shortened considerably, had it not been for the repeated blunders of one crewman. Should Captain Janeway have relieved this crewman of his duties and confined him to quarters? Hindsight is always 20/20.

 

Here are some examples of "forks in the road," where, without the actions of Ensign Gilligan, things may very well have turned out differently…

 

Message in a Bottle

Harry Kim finds a tiny wormhole to the Alpha Quadrant and the crew becomes excited at the possibility that everyone could beam safely home. Ensign Gilligan spills coconut juice on a critical console, however, collapsing the wormhole.

 

The 37's

Ancient human aviators Amelia Earhart and Wrongway Feldman are discovered in the Delta Quadrant. Feldman knows a shortcut back home, and is willing to share it, but Gilligan keeps him awake all night crunching on celery. Upset, Feldman leaves without sharing the secret.

 

Gilluvix

While Gilligan doesn't actually prevent Voyager from getting home in this episode, had Captain Janeway not decided to split up the being created in a transporter accident with Gilligan, Tuvok and Neelix, Gilligan's future blunders might have never happened.

 

Threshold

Tom Paris and Captain Janeway cross the transwarp threshold and then transform into giant slug-like creatures. They mate and give birth to Jungle Boy, played by Kurt Russell. Deciding to send Jungle Boy home early, Gilligan fashions a balloon made of raincoats, and forgets to put the SOS note into the pocket, so when the boy is rescued by the Federation, no one knows about Voyager's plight.

 

False Profits

The wormhole a pair of Ferengi used to reach the Delta Quadrant destabilizes and collapses when Gilligan (who had upside-down vision due to a holodeck accident) trips and falls into an Engineering control panel, which sends a concentrated tetryon beam into the wormhole. Captain Janeway angrily pulls her hair out and repeatedly hits Gilligan with it.

 

The Q and the Grey

Q is willing to take the ship and crew back to the Alpha Quadrant if they'll serve as a test audience for his Civil War re-enactment. Gilligan puts together a singing act with Janeway, Torres and Kes called The Honeybees, who upstage Q's terrible performance art, so he leaves the ship in the Delta Quadrant in a fit of jealous rage.

 

Retrospect

Gilligan spills a crate of coconuts all over Cargo Bay 2, causing Seven of Nine to trip and hit her head. For a while, she thinks she's Captain Janeway and starts ordering everyone around until The Doctor cures her with another blow to the head. Janeway suspends Gilligan's coconut privileges for the rest of the journey, however long it takes.

 

Pathfinder

When a Federation subspace experiment conducted by Reginald Barclay finally makes contact with Voyager, Gilligan trips over the burning logs spelling out "HELP" so that all Earth sees is "HELLO," and they end transmission thinking Voyager's fine and nothing's wrong.

 

Muse

Torres becomes stranded on a primitive planet and becomes the inspiration for producer Herald Hecuba. His stage productions of her stories prove wildly popular until he stages "The Story of Gilligan," which enrages the natives to the point that they find Torres and imprison her for life. Robbed of its Chief Engineer and one of its brightest crew members, Voyager's journey just got that much longer.

 

Endgame

Captain Janeway makes the most brilliant decision of her Starfleet career by allowing the Borg Queen to assimilate Gilligan, thus making the Borg clumsier and more likely to get stranded in deep space, never to be heard from again. Upon her return to Earth, she is promoted to Admiral.

<_<

[3 of 7 0]

ROFL. :borgqueen:

 

<_<

[Odo 0]

Clever.

[Gotabite 0]

Fun Reading!!!

[Syperphobia 0]

Now who's been watching too much tv?? <_<

[Goose 0]

Stardate:214234.6

 

 

LOL ensign gilligan <_<

[trekzone 0]

hehe <_<

[Rob 0]

*imagines The Skip.. err, Captain hitting Gilligan with her hat (if she had one) while yelling GILLIGAAAAAN!*

[Beam me up 0]

Ensign Gilligan? That would be bad.

 

For a short time, I was reading that Gillian.

[Alexander32 0]

Hehe, good joke.

Although I thought RC's Wesley trick was better, I can see you did a lot of research and fiction.

Congrats!

[Mike 5]

Hehe, good joke.

Although I thought RC's Wesley trick was better, I can see you did a lot of research and fiction.

Congrats!

I took it right from StarTrek.com as I said in the opening line..